Mending Broken Pieces
by Englasu
Summary: Completed sequel to Adjusting From Ignorance It's after the breakup. And both Kaiba and Tea have changed. Still SetoTea.
1. The Way Things Are

((Hello again! I'm back again! Now we can write more for the happiness of the wonderful world for you all. I hope you like this story just as much as the other two. So here we go, on our way to more happy kaibaness. On With The Fic!!!))  
  
Disclaimer: However sad it may be * sniffles * I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or any of the charries T.T  
  
Kaiba sat outside on his balcony late into the night as he ran a shaky hand down the side of his sweat-drenched face and shivered. Five months. That's how long it had been. Five long, long months. The dreams had started then. Each of them basically the same with a little twist each time. This one had just been like all the others, and it had the same feeling that came with it too. That sickly sweet feeling that was comforting and frightening at the exact same time as the repetitive play had repeated itself once more on this night.  
  
Walking inside once again he climbed into his bed slowly and pulled the sheets back over. Get through this night. That's all he had to focus on. One night at a time. Get through this one, then the next, and then the next. Take each one individually and then it didn't seem too bad. So all he had to do was sleep through the rest of this night, and then in the morning it would all be forgotten and he wouldn't need to worry anymore.  
  
With his eyes beginning to flicker slowly shut he settled his breath into the soft rhythmic pattern of sleep as he let his muscles relax again and his thoughts take their own paths once more.  
  
********************  
  
The sun shining in his eyes was what woke Seto up that morning. Placing an arm over his head to block the pestering rays he threw his sheets off of him and slunked over to his dresser where he opened the drawers and grabbed his outfit for the day. Black pants, black sleeveless shirt, and to top it off a silver chain and some black leather wrist guards.  
  
Glancing over at the clock he then grabbed his cell phone out of his trench and shoved it into his back pocket before he headed on his way downstairs. Saturday, Seto's absolute least favorite day, and to top it all off it was summer. Yes summer had come to rear its ugly head in the Kaiba mansion. And Seto was not enjoying one minute of it.  
  
The worst part about summer was that he could finish his work in a couple of hours, and then he would have the rest of the day ahead of him to deal with. So he'd decided to basically stick to the schedule he had during the school year, start work at three, and end it at six. But that still meant he had to find something else to do with himself.  
  
The first two weeks after school had been let out were essentially spent exhausting all the supplies the mansion had to offer. Kaiba has combed the library through and also set up a good number of alternate duel-monster decks that could be used, and that was basically it. In the more current weeks he'd taken up the habit of walking. There wasn't much else he COULD do, and the quiet time in the fresh air he found was actually doing him some good.  
  
So that's what he set out to do this morning. When he'd gone down the stairs he'd found Mokuba loyally glued to his cartoon shows the only reason why he would be up before eight on a Saturday. Rolling his eyes slightly Seto leaned over the back of the couch and ruffled the scruffy mane that Mokuba was slowly regaining.  
  
"I'm going out for a walk, okay kiddo?"  
  
The younger leaned his head back to stare up at the face of his big brother. "You're gonna be back in time for our game right?"  
  
Kaiba nodded and ruffled the hair again before sliding off the back of the couch and calling behind him. "Wouldn't miss it. Back in a while, later."  
  
That was another thing Seto had picked up a few months back. Every day he would play some sort of a game or another with Mokuba. Generally they ended up with chess, or duel-monsters, but there was always the occasional Scrabble of Battleship thrown into the mix.  
  
Opening the car door he climbed in and started driving towards where he was going to take his hike today. There were a few good places he'd found in the area, some woods with trails cut through them, but today he was just going to go through the park.  
  
******************  
  
Kaiba strolled on the outer rim of the baseball field and looked through the mesh fencing until he found an opening and stepped through as he went to sit on the bleachers and watch the various groups of people in the area. It was now almost eleven and the sun was well up into the sky, so the amount of people in the park had been steadily growing and there were quite a few.  
  
Seto's gaze ran over a small group of kids forming up teams on the diamond and he smiled as his mind began to wander.  
  
******************  
  
"Hey can we play?" A seven-year-old Seto walked up with a very small Mokuba towing along behind him with a firm grasp onto his brother's hand.  
  
The other kid who was about the same age as Seto shrugged. "Only one of ya can, otherwise we'd have an uneven number. Why don't you leave him on the bench." He pointed to Mokuba and then looked back up at Seto. "You can play shortstop for us."  
  
Seto shook his head though and pushed Mokuba forward. "Oh no, that's okay. I'll watch. Mokuba will play instead." He gave his younger brother a gentle shove and smiled down at him, reassuring him that he really didn't mind sitting, and then he made his way over to the bench and sat down as the game started going into play.  
  
After a couple of innings had passed through Seto felt a large baseball cap fall onto his head backwards and it was given a playful tug.  
  
"What are you doing sitting over here all by yourself?"  
  
With a smile Seto lifted the cap off of his eyes and stared at his father next to him. "They didn't have enough room for both of us so I let Mokuba go." He shrugged. "It's fine." Turning his head back he pointed at his grinning little brother who was poised and ready to run on first base. "Lookit how happy he is."  
  
Seto's father shook his head and chuckled as he yanked the cap back over his eldest son's eyes. "Come on then. Up with you. We can't let Mokuba have all the fun."  
  
Seto had his father's arm wrap around his middle and lift him off the bench where he carried him over to a spot further down the field where they had dumped the blanket and other such things for the day. After being dumped down onto the grass Seto watched as his dad pulled two gloves and a baseball.  
  
Chucking the oversized glove to his son Seto's father smiled and fit his own glove on. Then walking over a few feet away he waited until Seto got up and stood a few feet away before throwing the ball in his direction.  
  
Catching the ball a big smile grew onto the young one's feature and he laughed as he threw it back. His father caught it in return and threw it again. Then as he caught what was thrown back to him by Seto again he opened his mouth.  
  
"Yo Kaiba! Heads up!"  
  
*******************  
  
Kaiba snapped back into reality as the strange voice came out of his father, just in time to see the baseball coming straight for his face, and then his world went black.  
  
*******************  
  
"Hellooooooo, anybody in there?"  
  
A whispered comment came from somewhere off in the distance. "Joey, your aim sucks."  
  
Another female voice chimed in. "Not like yours is any better."  
  
"At least I got it NEAR the person."  
  
"I had to run like ten feet to catch your pass."  
  
"Well I still didn't hit anybody."  
  
The first voice butted in. "Shut up you guys, I think he's coming around."  
  
Seto's eye flickered open slowly and a blurry image of the blonde appeared in his vision and he sat up. Immediately afterwards a throbbing pain entered his head and he put a hand against it and stared at the three people huddled around him. Joey in the foremost position with Tea and Tristan slightly behind.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
Tristan smirked and pointed his thumb at his friend. "Mr. Genius here whacked you in the face with a baseball."  
  
Joey glared at him. "I didn't MEAN to!"  
  
"Suuuuuuure."  
  
Joey sent another glare in his direction and then turned back to Kaiba. "You alright dude?"  
  
Seto slowly rose to his feet and leaned against the bleachers, which he had been moved off of. Narrowing his eyes he still held a hand to his head as he stared at the blonde. "I'm fine you moron."  
  
He got up from the kneel he had been in over Kaiba and turned on his heel huffily. "Geez, sorry for caring."  
  
Tristan and Tea followed after him and left Seto to lean on the bleachers as he recovered himself.  
  
After a few minutes the throbbing lessened so he left the spot and headed towards the other end of the park where he had put his car.  
  
So that was the way things had settled. After the breakup everything had gradually settled back into being the way they had used to be. Kaiba had returned to his corner for the rest of the school year, the gang had gone back to ignoring him, and he had slowly adapted himself back into work mode. Of course there had been a few changes that couldn't be helped. Seto was no longer hated, and he didn't hate them in return. But that was essentially all that the feelings were, feelings of tolerance, not of acceptance. All emotions that used to have gone in Tea's directions had been successfully redirected towards Mokuba and work.  
  
Ere go, that was how the game time had started each day.  
  
Everything that had gone by in the months before was wiped from everybody's minds. As far as they were concerned it never happened. so there was no reason to ever bring it up again.  
  
Over the summer there had been a few brief run-ins with each other, but they mostly went the way this last one had. Very short, very sweet, and generally with one of them just turning and leaving.  
  
*****************  
  
Opening the door into the mansion with the soft thumping pain in his head still steadily working away Kaiba walked in and slumped down onto the couch next to Mokuba, who of course was still watching his cartoons since it wasn't quite yet twelve and they were still running.  
  
Looking away for a moment Mokuba stared at his brother who was rubbing at the blueish-black mark growing in the middle of his forehead.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
Seto gave a small sigh and smirked. "Oh, just a reminder that baseballs don't belong in people's faces." He saw Mokuba's expression before more confused and he smiled. "Forget about it."  
  
******************  
  
Later that night Kaiba set out once again. He figured his walk earlier that day had been ruined, but there was no reason why he couldn't finish it now. He decided to opt for hiking through the woods instead of the park, since generally all the psychopaths decided to hang around there in large numbers once the sun went down.  
  
At this point he was standing on a bridge with a wide shallow stream running below it. Seto leaned against the railing and closed is eyes as he let the night's sounds lull through his brain.  
  
"I can give you wings, If you let me in, You can take my heart, I can cure your sins."  
  
The soft musical hum reached Kaiba's ears and he opened his eyes to look for the person, but there was no one to be seen.  
  
"You're the cookie on the sheet, Tender soft and oh so sweet, Left in the sun you crack and break, I know that there's too much to take."  
  
Seto walked off the edge of the bridge and started down the course of the stream where he heard the voice trailing from.  
  
"Alone you can not survive, But I'll take you in, You can take me heart, I can cure your sins."  
  
'Who's singing that?' Still glancing around he looked for the person, but still there was no one.  
  
"The wind of time wears hearts away, Tears the rugs and makes them fray, They can be sewn and put to mend, But all you needed was a friend."  
  
The gentle melody continued echoing through the woods as he went further downstream.  
  
"Don't shut your spirit out, I'll put it back in, You can take my heart, I can cure your sins."  
  
He went further, still in search of the voice that was hauntingly drifting towards him.  
  
"Sand is small and very frail, Tan and brown and oh so pale, Yet it conquers mountains large, Don't fight to much, let me take charge."  
  
The voice decreased slightly in volume so Seto sped up his pace.  
  
"Alone you are a fighter, But you need to let me in, You can take my heart, I can cure your sins."  
  
It became quieter still and he made his feet move faster across the soil below.  
  
"Stream and rivers ever flowing, On with life you are still rowing, Let me help and take you in, You can take my heart, I can cure your sins."  
  
It became even softer and Kaiba broke out into a run in hopes a catching the voice before it disappeared all together.  
  
"The past was forced behind you, But you miss it dear, Let me help you remember, Move over, let me steer."  
  
Knocking twigs and branches out of his way he sprinted towards where the voice was coming from.  
  
"You can take my heart, I can cure you sins, You can take my heart, Alone you can not win."  
  
Seto broke out of the trees and found himself right on the edge of a cliff. Screeching to a halt and spraying rocks and loose soil in front of him just before he vaulted out over the jagged edge, he froze as he finally say the person causing the haunting melody. Standing as close to the edge as he dared, he stared at the girl skipping from rock to rock as she hummed the last few verses softly to herself as the moonlight played itself across the bubbling spring.  
  
"You can take my heart, I trust in you, believe, You can take my heart, Look what we achieve. You can take my heart, We are not broken, You can take my heart, Forever take my heart."  
  
Seto gazed down at her while she continued humming the enchanting tune as she made her way to the shore and sat down on the grass beside it with her back facing him. Slowly breaking from his trance he started climbing down the cliff face until he was able to jump the last bit. Then walking next to her as the surreal atmosphere with the moon and the opened glade played over his thoughts he slid down next to her without her noticing, and stared at the water just as she was, before speaking gently.  
  
"That was a very nice song Tea."  
  
((So how was that for chapter one? You likey? Hope so * crosses fingers * Just mentioning, I came up with the song lyrics all by myself, so I got claim to 'em ^_^ but okay, anyway, enough talk. I should be typing! Posting is probably gonna be going at a snails pace . Been kinda slow lately. but I'll go as fast as I can!. Later now! Review lots!)) 


	2. There

Jerking backwards in surprise Tea blinked a couple times in shock over at him. "Oh, uh, Kaiba, what are you doing here?"  
  
Seto gave a small smirk and continued staring at the stream that was softly bubbling in front of them. "I heard you singing and I came to check it out." He turned his head to look at her. "So what are you doing all the way out here, and on a Saturday night no less?"  
  
"Oh not much." She shrugged. "I didn't really have anything to do tonight so I figured I'd come out here."  
  
"I'm surprised you didn't decide to go hang out with your friends"  
  
She gave another shrug. "Mm.Well you know, every once in a while it's nice to get off by yourself."  
  
He nodded. "I know what you mean."  
  
"So what are YOU doing out here?"  
  
Seto smirked a little. "Just thinking. Keeping my head busy."  
  
"Any reason in particular?"  
  
He picked up a few dead twigs and snapped them in his fingers. "Not one that really matters."  
  
Tea was about to ask something about this, just out of curiosity, but he stopped her.  
  
"I hope you have a good rest of the night."  
  
"Oh, yeah, sure. You too." She blinked a couple of times and watched him get up. "Tell Mokuba I said hi."  
  
With a nod Kaiba walked off leaving Tea in the small glade as the moon cast its shadow down on the still night.  
  
*********************  
  
"Mokuba." A tear trickled down Seto's face as he stared at the grave of his younger brother. "Why Mokuba? Why?" Shaking his head he turned and walked away with a shovel gripped tensely in his fist. He'd just buried his brother, his own little brother in his own back yard. Mokuba had died that day, he'd just plain died. One second he was walking into Kaiba's room to wake him up, the next he was a lifeless bundle on the floor.  
  
Seto rounded the corner to the mansion and threw the shovel through one of the lower windows. Watching the glass shatter he then stepped up onto the sill and climbed inside as he stepped down onto the boggy ground underneath him.  
  
He walked forward slowly as the soil squelched with each step until he found his foot caught in the deep ooze. Grabbing his leg with both hands he tried to yank it out unsuccessfully. As he gave a couple hard pulls his other foot sank deeper. Kaiba noticed this and then tried to free this one while it just had the same effect as the last time. He moaned slightly as a small feeling of panic took over him as he sank down to his calves.  
  
Looking around frantically he saw a chair set up a couple feet away from him. He tried to lean over and grab it, but he couldn't reach. So in a desperate attempt he gave a lung forward that ended up setting him off balance so that he fell face first into the bog that was his mansion's floor. Turning his head as best he could as the sticky ooze slowly crept its way further and further over his body he tried to push himself up with his arms, but that only resulted in them sinking further into the mire as well.  
  
Seto gasped for air as the choking stench of rotting vegetation filled his nostrils and the mud also made its way over his chest. As the pressure built up on his rib cage he grunted in pain as thoughts flood into his mind. 'Why was this happening? When would it stop? Why was he being left all alone to die like this? Would death be a bad thing? Would it free him from all of his pain or would it just cause him more?'  
  
His mouth sank under the ooze and gradually it began covering his nose too. As the last of his air was cut off from him he watched the mud close over his eyes and the world go black as he sat in darkness for a few moments until everything became blurry and he was forced to try and breath. All that his lungs received however was the choking taste of mud that took him over and finally, as the absolute last oxygen left in his body was taken away.. his heart stopped the rhythmic pattern and lay still.  
  
*******************  
  
Kaiba found himself in a dark hallway. Reaching his arms onto either side of him he felt the walls there but could not see them. The only thing his eyes could see was a small dot of light off in the distance. He got up off the ground and started heading down the path as images started flickering past him.  
  
"Brother are you alright?" Mokuba's face slid back down the hallway behind Kaiba.  
  
"Don't be sad Seto. If you remember your mother then she'll always be with you." His father's image flew past as well.  
  
"I'm proud of you son." His mother's face disappeared behind him.  
  
"Are you finished with those programs?" Gozaburo flew past.  
  
"See you tomorrow." Tea went back down the hallway too as more little tidbits of his life and people flew by.  
  
"I knew you wouldn't leave me."  
  
"Happy birthday Seto!"  
  
"Want me to come over?"  
  
"Yo dude! What's up?"  
  
"Step as you swing, you'll get more punch that way."  
  
"Kaiba? What have you done Kaiba?!"  
  
"Shut up you stupid kid."  
  
"Ya big jerk!"  
  
"Get out of my life!"  
  
"Why brother? Why are you doing this?"  
  
The voices started drifting into his own.  
  
"I-I'm sorry sir."  
  
"Can you forgive me?"  
  
"I missed you too."  
  
"It's called justifiable homicide Joseph."  
  
"I've just been hurting you this entire time."  
  
As the voices became more jumbled and mixed together, switching between things he'd said in the past and what others had, with also scenes from his life going through as well. The pictures suddenly ground to a halt and Seto was left with a feeling of peace as it all went silent and all the he could see before him was the small white light.  
  
Slowly pacing forward the light grew larger and the feeling became more apparent until he came to a sort of crossroad in the hallway. There were two hallways coming off of the one he was currently in. If he went straight there was the light, to his right the feint sound of chains clinking together made themselves apparent and a fuzzy image of fire entered his brain. But to his left, down the left hallway there was a soft melody coming forth.  
  
Seto froze and stared down the path as the music reached his ears. 'That song. I've heard that song before.'  
  
Turning from the main path he felt himself drawn towards the gentle tune, but he was going blindly, and he couldn't see. The light was totally gone so there was nothing for him to go by, and he was just stumbling down the dark path with the hope of finding whatever it was he wanted to find.  
  
After a few minutes of traveling down the black hallway a silhouetted figure came before him and he smiled.  
  
"Tea, what are you doing here?"  
  
She in turn nodded to him and drew her finger out, beckoning him to come forward.  
  
Still with the pulling feeling taking over him Kaiba took a few steps in Tea's direction until one of his steps was not rewarded with a floor to hold him.  
  
As Tea disappeared from his view a small wind flew around him as he fell down into the dark. He fell, and he fell, and he just kept falling and just when he thought he couldn't fall anymore. He was wrong.  
  
********************  
  
Seto woke again in another dark place. Pushing his arms out he found they could only move and inch or so. A little confused he tried to push forward, but again his fingers met with a velvety lining a few inches away.  
  
'I know where I am.' Kaiba smiled and settled back down in the place with a soft sigh. 'I'm finally here.'  
  
He then bunched his legs up as best he could and pushed the wall that he was met with up. There was a soft creaking as the hinges to the lid moved, and Seto could put his hand through the small crack and felt the damp earth outside of his small confined space. Bending himself at an odd angle he started shoveling the soil inside the coffin which he now knew he was in, until he was able to squeeze half of his body into the hollow he'd made.  
  
Filling the rest of the box with the dirt he pushed up on the soil above his head and found that it moved slightly. Giving it another couple of good shoves his hand broke through and he started widening the small hole he'd made until he was able to climb out onto the soft grass.  
  
Turning he looked behind him and saw the lines and lines of gravestones, the closest of course being his own, and ahead of him he saw people. Most of them he had little to no recognition of, but over to his right he saw a small group of three people having a picnic. Smiling he finished climbing out of the hole and he brushed himself off before heading over and sitting next to one of the three on the checkered blanket. Ruffling the hair he chuckled.  
  
"Glad to see you got here alright."  
  
Mokuba took a lick from the ice cream cone he was eating and smiled up at him. "I didn't know you were coming so soon."  
  
He shrugged. "Yeah, well, you know." Then bringing his head up he smiled again. "Hey Dad, long time no see."  
  
His father looked him up and down. "My, you've sure grown."  
  
Reaching into the picnic basket his mother pulled out a sandwich and gave it to Seto. "You certainly have. So how have things been?"  
  
Kaiba shrugged and took a bite from the sandwich. "Recently it's been okay. Not much else to do except work and walk. I ran into Tea on my way here though."  
  
"Who's Tea?"  
  
Mokuba answered for him, "She's the nice lady Seto's gonna marry!"  
  
His dad's expression grew curious. "Really?"  
  
"Yeah, we were planning the 25th of this month. I just hope that we can get everything done by then. You know, she still hasn't bought her dress yet, and we have to get the rings engraved. There's just so much to be done."  
  
"That sounds very nice Seto, but how are you going to get married if you're here, and she's back down there?" His mother's tone was growing a little anxious.  
  
Kaiba just shrugged however. "I'll think of something. Maybe we'll just get married when she gets up here. That could work as well."  
  
Mokuba started looking sad. "Seto, you aren't supposed to be here yet."  
  
He raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"  
  
Kaiba's father nodded. "I think Mokuba is right. You shouldn't be here yet son. You need to go back."  
  
His mother nodded as well and stared at him. "You don't belong here."  
  
Seto's expression grew hurt. "But I don't want to go back. I want to stay here with you. We're finally a family again."  
  
"Shut up and get your useless self out of here you little brat."  
  
Kaiba whirled around and saw Gozaburo standing there glaring at him with his arms folded, and he just froze there in shock at seeing him.  
  
"Are you getting hard of hearing? I told you to get out of here. Now!"  
  
Seto blinked a couple of times before standing and blinking more. "But I just got here-"  
  
"Dammit! You stupid kid! Leave!" Gozaburo approached him and struck him hard across the face.  
  
He put a hand up to his cheek and felt the burn go through it, but Kaiba turned to face his family. "Mom, Dad, you don't really want me to go. Do you?"  
  
His father got up and solemnly nodded. "It's for the best son."  
  
"B-But Dad-?"  
  
He held his hand up. "No, you're leaving. That's that."  
  
Seto looked around at them in disbelief. "But I- I don't want to go. I want to stay here!"  
  
This time his mother stood up with the same grim expression that had coated everyone's faces except for Seto. "I'm afraid you don't have a choice in the matter."  
  
Kaiba shook his head. "No. No! I'm not going!"  
  
The other people in the area started to slowly creep there way towards him, along with his parents, Gozaburo, and Mokuba.  
  
Seto tried to back away but found they were all around him. Staring in disbelief at them he stammered. "But I don't want to! I'm not going to! You can't make me!"  
  
A hand fell down onto his shoulder and he noticed it slowly decay into a mere skeleton as he looked over to the face of the person it belonged to. But he couldn't recognize them until a rasping voice escaped that clearly belonged to his mother which had been just the way he remembered her a few moments before.  
  
"Leave Seto!"  
  
The other people surrounding him closed in further as they started chanting and their bodies decayed into skeletons with the flesh hanging loosely off their bones. "Leave, leave, leave, leave."  
  
Kaiba shook his head and tried to shove them away but they grabbed onto his arms and the revolting smell of their decaying bodies filled his nose and he gagged trying to breath through his mouth but he ended up just tasting it instead. He shivered and struggled as they closed further in on him. Tackling him to the ground still continuing to chant in their raspy voices from what was left of their voice boxes. As he fell under the weight and they fell across his face, burying him in themselves he felt them start chewing on his skin, his arms, his legs, even his face.  
  
He yelled out, half in pain, half in just the plain fact that he knew he was being eaten alive. As they ate away from the outside, a feeling of being eaten from the inside started taking over him. Screaming out again he tried to struggle, but he couldn't, there was nothing he could do, the crushing weight of their numbers pressed him against the ground. The air was being squeezed out of his lungs as the stench made him go dizzy and he tried to scream again but there was no sound that came out.  
  
Kaiba pulled his arm through the writhing mass and grabbed at one of the bodies, which he pulled over himself, trying to shield himself with the squirming zombie. A black lock fell down onto his face from the back of the thing's head and it shouted.  
  
"Brother, let me go!"  
  
Seto froze and stared at the back of the still squirming figure's head as they shifted back into a full-fledged person. Mokuba sat on top of him and then turned over with a black light glowing from his eyes and he hissed. "Good things come to those who wait Seto Kaiba!" And he launched forward, mouth open, ready to devour once more.  
  
((Hehe, I'm just answering lovely questions that people put to me, but Yami is just kinda non-existent O.o Maybe he did go to Cuba, with Bakura's yami too! ^_^ Well, awe well.. Too late now. I don't think it really makes that much difference at this point anyway. So later and stuff peeps! Keep reviewing!)) 


	3. The Party

((Okay, for all of you confused people out there. I'm gonna give a little summary of what happened, but it may possibly make more sense once you read a little bit of this chapters.. But ANYway, I'll give you a summary just in case.  
  
Last chapter: Tea was surprised to see Kaiba there in the glade at night. They had a very small conversation of just sort of idle chitchat. Afterwards it skips right into where Seto is walking away from the grave that he just dug and put Mokuba in. Who is now dead. Then he chucked the shovel through a window and used that to get into the mansion instead of a door. The floor of his mansion has turned into a swamp, which he ended up sinking down into presumably dead. After that he was in a dark tunnel and flashes from the past were just sort of humming around him until he came to a crossway. One direction was essentially heaven, the other hell, and the last an unknown. Kaiba went down the unknown since he heard the song Tea had been singing earlier coming from it. Down that hallway he in fact found Tea, and was about to go up to her when he fell down a hole in the floor that he couldn't see since it was dark. After that, he woke up inside a coffin, which he dug himself out of, and was now in a sort of Land of the Dead, should we say. There he found his mom, his dad, and Mokuba and was catching up with them on how things were going. The subject of Tea was brought up and Seto explained how he was planning on marrying her (even if he really wasn't, it's just the way dreams work on things not being the way they really are.) After that his parents told him he wasn't supposed to be dead yet and that he should go back to life. Seto of course was unhappy about this, since he wanted to stay with his reunited family. The zombie people attacked him and started eating him. He tried to pull one of the zombie's in front of him as a sort of shield, and in fact that particular zombie was Mokuba. Seto let him go and then Mokuba was all possessed and turned on Kaiba saying that "Good things come to those who wait." The lovely line that I keep bringing up in this fic. And then Mokuba attacked Seto like all the other zombies were.  
  
Eheh, well. That was sort of long, but I hope it helped some . Anyway, here's the next chap for ya.))  
  
"Mokuba, No!" Seto shot up in his bed with his eyes wide open. Looking around he checked where he was before flinging the covers off and walking out onto the balcony.  
  
Another perfect night, the same dream again.  
  
He ran a finger down the side of his face and shook his head. He hated that dream, just hated it, and of course that was the one that kept coming back to haunt him.  
  
Turning from the balcony again he walked inside and sat on the edge of his bed clutching at his stomach as a sickly feeling took over him and the ending scenes flickered across his brainwaves. Leaning forward he took a couple deep breaths as he stared at the floor and tried to drive the pictures out of his head. but they just wouldn't leave.  
  
"It's just tonight. It's just tonight. Don't worry about the others, just worry about tonight." He muttered under his breath as he shook slightly as he closed his eyes and took shaky breaths. "It'll all be fine in the morning. It's not real. It's just for this one night."  
  
Of course this last part was a lie, and he knew it, but it was all the comforting that he could give himself in order to make it through this night and onto the next.  
  
Taking another couple of deep breaths he leaned back on his bed and stared up at the ceiling still with a sick feeling churning in his stomach, but he ignored it and closed his eyes. 'It's just tonight. It'll all get better. Don't worry about it.'  
  
****************  
  
The next day, or rather the next afternoon, Kaiba returned to the house from his daily walk and took a shower. Now he was coming back downstairs after picking out another entirely black outfit, and he looked over at Mokuba who was playing the Nintendo 64.  
  
"Hey Mokuba. Did we get any mail today?"  
  
"Yup, it's over on the table."  
  
Seto walked over and flipped through the papers. "Bill, bill, bill, bill, junk, junk, Oh, what's this?"  
  
Mokuba didn't look away from his game but asked, "Something interesting big brother?"  
  
Kaiba shrugged and put the other things back on the table as he starts opening the letter in his hand. "Not especially, just a letter."  
  
"Who's it from?"  
  
"I'm getting to that." When he finished opening it he pulled out the piece of paper and ran his eyes over it as he started reading out loud. "You are invited to a pool party hosted by Aina Travis. Everybody's going to be there. Come and join the fun." Pulling a wry face he dumped it back on the table. "Why would I waste my time with something like that?"  
  
Mokuba paused his game and jumped up to go look at the paper himself. While looking it over he yank on Seto's pant leg. "Can I go?"  
  
Kaiba looked down at him. "I'm not sure if you can, do you really want to go?"  
  
The small blue eyes stared at him pleadingly. "Can you ask? Please?"  
  
He couldn't help but smile at the eagerness of his little brother. "Okay, I'll see what I can do. But don't get your hopes up."  
  
Mokuba grinned and held the invite into Kaiba's face. "Call 'em now!"  
  
Seto shook his head and pulled his cell phone from his pocket with a chuckle. "Okay." He then took the paper from Mokuba and pushed in the number and waited for someone to pick up.  
  
Ring. Ring. Ring.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hello, may I please speak to Aina."  
  
"This is she, may I ask who's calling please?"  
  
"It's Seto Kaiba, you sent me and invitation to your party."  
  
"Oh hey! Do you need directions or something?"  
  
"No, that's fine. I was wondering if my little brother could join me. Would that be alright?"  
  
There was a little pause and then a valley-style. "Okay! See ya Wednesday then! Make sure to bring your suit and your towel! Later!"  
  
"Bye." Hanging up the phone he shoved it back in his pocket and then looked down to the hopeful gaze of Mokuba and shook his head. "Sorry Mokuba."  
  
The little one's expression sank and then Seto smiled and ruffled his hair. "Just kidding little guy. You can go, it's no problem."  
  
"Yay!" Mokuba leaped in the air and hugged onto his brother's leg. "Thank you!" Then continuing on with his happy spazz he ran around the room a couple of times before springing over the back of the couch and starting right back into his video game.  
  
Kaiba shook his head at the youngster's antics and chuckled at how please he was to just be allowed to go to some lame party some random person from Seto's class was throwing. 'If only it were so simple to find happiness for me.'  
  
***************  
  
Tea walked through the house and into the backyard with Yugi and the gang. All of them had gotten invitations to this party as well.  
  
She felt very uncomfortable and wrung the ends of the towel that was draped over her shoulder, but as soon as they stepped out onto the back porch a perky blonde bounced up to them.  
  
"Hey, glad you could make it! Pools over that if you like, wanna take a swim, and the food is like right next to it." Aina flashed a smile at them and then ran back to all the other people who were already there.  
  
Tea glanced around and them and relaxed slightly when she saw that most or all of the people were just from their class. Stepping off the porch she watched Joey and Tristan bolt off towards the food. She rolled her eyes and smiled before putting her towel down on one of the chairs next to the pool, and she also slid off her shorts that she had put on over her bathing suit.  
  
Next she made her way to the diving board where she did a hop skip run to the end before springing off and going down into the water.  
  
****************  
  
Kaiba was idly sitting in one of the lounge chairs on the edge of the pool. He hadn't brought his suit, he didn't have any intention whatsoever of going swimming. The only reason why he'd come at all was because of Mokuba, who was having a high old time swimming around in the pool. Seto smirked a little and shook his head at his little brother. 'I'm glad he's enjoying himself.'  
  
The other kids hadn't minded at all having the ten-year-old join in the game. He was actually doing a very good job of fitting in. The main event in the pool at the moment was someone standing at one end throwing a Styrofoam football, and the large group of people at the other end would scramble to get it when it was thrown in hopes to get the points that the main thrower called out. Mokuba was thoroughly enjoying himself as he splashed around and giggled. Seto almost wished he could join them. almost.  
  
"Hey, why aren't you swimmin'?" Joey came up with a plateful of food and sat down on the chair next to him.  
  
Kaiba blankly stared at him, only slightly annoyed that his peace had been interrupted. "I don't want to."  
  
Tristan then came up on his other side with a plate of food similar to Joey's and raised an eyebrow. "What's the point of coming to a pool party if you aren't going to swim?"  
  
Seto just lifted his arm and pointed at Mokuba swimming in the water before he leaned back in the chair and crossed his arms with his eyes closed.  
  
As such, he didn't see the evil grin that passed between Joey and Tristan.  
  
A few moments after he'd leaned back Kaiba found himself feeling his body lifted off the chair as hands grabbed onto his feet and underneath his arms. He opened his eyes and realized what was happening a little too late..  
  
******************  
  
Tea covered her face with her arms as the splash went out. Wiping the water from her eyes she looked over at Tristan and Joey who were smiling on the edge at somebody in the pool and her eyes traveled over to who they were staring at.  
  
Kaiba was in the water, fully dressed, shoes and all with a look of disgust on his face. He made his way towards the ladder and climbed up it and then traveled over to the two who had just thrown him in with a glare as the water dripped off of him.  
  
Reaching into his back pocket he opened his cell phone and watched the water pour out of it and then glared at Joey and Tristan.  
  
"Did it ever occur to you two, that I didn't WANT to go swimming?"  
  
Joey shrugged and smiled. "Hey, it's all in fun dude."  
  
Seto gave a low growl and clenched his fists before speaking through clenched teeth. "Well next time have your 'fun' with somebody else." Eyes twitching slightly he turned and strode away from them leaving Tristan with a curious expression to his blonde friend.  
  
"That's it?"  
  
Joey was just as bewildered. "I, guess so."  
  
*****************  
  
At seven Kaiba drove Mokuba home and dropped him off before returning to the party that was going to go much later that night. He didn't really want to go back, but the only way that the hostess, Aina, would allow him to bring Mokuba home was if he left something as hostage in assurance that he would come back.  
  
Therefore he was being forced to go back in order to retrieve his necklace, which he had very sorely parted with, but it was the only thing that he had had on him that was worth anything after being dumped in the pool. At least with him being able to go home for the brief moment he was able to change to another pair of black pants and t-shirt to match.  
  
As he walked back into the back of the party as the sun set he retrieved his necklace from Aina and put it back around his neck as small hate thoughts for the ditzy blonde that was throwing this bash flitted through his mind. As soon as he had gotten the item of interest he made his way to a far corner where essentially no one was.  
  
'I don't even know why I'm still here. It's not like I have a reason to be. Mokuba's gone now, and the only reason I came in the first place was just to watch him. I could go pay Joey and Tristan back for dumping me in the water, but that would upset Tea and I don't want to do that.'  
  
Realizing what he'd just thought he stopped and tilted his head in the slightest. 'Okay, I didn't just say that. I don't have any feelings for her anymore. That's gone, said and done. No more.'  
  
He folded his arms and closed his eyes just as he noticed his stomach starting to churn and an image of him walking away from Mokuba's grave with the shovel in his hand started playing through his mind.  
  
'No!' His eyes snapped open and he stared around at the people who were illuminated by the lamplight since the sun was long past down. The recurring dream started going further and he shook his head trying to halt its progress. 'No, not here! This can't happen here!'  
  
Leaving the corner as quickly as possible he rushed through the people as fast as he could without drawing attention to himself and went inside the house trying to find a solitary room for himself that would be safe.  
  
******************  
  
"Be right back guys!"  
  
Tea waved at her friends and started heading for the inside. She'd slid her shorts back on over her swimsuit and was now wandering around the inside of the house looking for a bathroom to use.  
  
She opened a couple of the doors and found other rooms instead. A guest room, billiard room, the like, nothing special. Walking down the hall further she heard a thudding noise come from one of the rooms and she opened the door.  
  
Inside she found the room she was looking for, but it was already occupied. Stammering a couple of times she blushed. "Oh, I'm sorry! I'll just leave and." Her voice trailed off and she stared a Kaiba curled up in the corner, sitting on the floor, shaking.  
  
Tea took a few steps forward and cocked her head to the side as she stared down at him. "Are you okay?"  
  
Seto's eyes remained squeezed shut as he muttered quietly through clenched teeth. "I'm fine. It's almost done and-" Gasping a few quick breaths he banged his head back against the wall and then stood up, still shaking slightly, but better than he was. Still looking at the floor as he straightened his shirt he started, "Okay, sorry. You can-" He stopped for the second time and his pupils shrank as he fell back to the floor and clutched at his stomach. "Tea, please leave."  
  
She raised an eyebrow and crouched down to stare at his wincing face and his teeth chattered in his pale face. "You don't look so good."  
  
Seto shook his head and stood again where he supported himself on the wall while still clutching at his stomach. "Just. Leave. I'll be fine. I just need you, to leave."  
  
"Um." Tea blinked and stood up as well. "Are you going to be able to drive home like this?"  
  
An almost playful smirk came to his face. "Hey, don't worry about me. Dreams don't hurt anybody. I just get through this night and then I won't have it again. It's just tonight."  
  
Getting a skeptic expression she watched him as he still stood there chattering and she couldn't help but get the feeling that he was lying about something. "Are you sure you're gonna be okay?"  
  
"I'll be fine. Just go." Seto cringed again and slid down the wall to be on the floor once more.  
  
Tea shook her head. "I'm gonna go ask Joey if he'll give you a ride home." She turned to leave and was just about out the door when she heard a heaving sound behind her. Turning again she say Kaiba with his head in the toilet, throwing up.  
  
Walking over she patted him on the back a couple times and after a little while he pulled away and flushed the toilet. Standing he went over to the sink and splashed water over his face while Tea continued watching him. Finally after he'd done that he turned to face her and gave a weak smile. "I'll be fine now. No need to get Joey involved. Maybe it was just the dip in the pool earlier. Caught a cold or something."  
  
Tea crossed her arms and shook her head again.  
  
Seto eyed her. "What?"  
  
Sighing she uncrossed her arms and shrugged. "Oh nothing." Flashing a quick smile she pushed him towards the door. "Now if you'll excuse me."  
  
Kaiba found himself shoved out of the bathroom and the door shut behind him. Glancing sideways at it he gave a half smirk. 'Same Tea as always I see.'  
  
****************  
  
Nine o'clock, still early in the evening and Seto had had enough time to fully recover himself. His daily dose had been taken for the day, and his dream was over. 'So I don't need to worry about it.' He gave a soft sigh and scanned his eyes across the still fairly large amount of people at the party. Just before he was about to drift back into thought, the perky voice that made him twitch reached his ears.  
  
"Kaiba! Like, get over here! We're gonna play truth or dare!"  
  
His reply was flat. "No."  
  
Rolling her eyes Aina came over and yanked him off of the chair he was sitting on the small group of people that had gathered. Half of the members of the party were still in the pool or off doing other things, so the little crowd that Aina had managed to force into the game resulted in Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Tea, Bakura, and a few other odd classmates.  
  
When she shoved Kaiba down next to Yugi in the small circle that was formed she smiled and took her own seat next to Tristan before opening in her chipper valley, "Okay, so we're gonna play truth or dare. First person I pick iiiiiiiiiis.." She paused and ran her fingers around the circle. "Yugi! Truth or dare?"  
  
Yugi thought for a moment and then replied, "Dare."  
  
An evil smile grew onto Aina's face. "Then I dare you too, like, dance around acting like a chicken while singing the muffin man song for like three minutes."  
  
*****************  
  
A few minutes later Yugi sat down and gave a little smile. "Well then, Bakura, truth or dare?"  
  
"Truth, I guess." He shrugged.  
  
Yugi nodded. "Who do you have a crush on?"  
  
Bakura paused and shrugged again. "Nobody currently."  
  
Aina rolled her eyes. "Well, like, that did us a lot of good. Let's try to ask, like, more original questions?"  
  
Yugi blushed. "Sorry."  
  
And so the little circle rotated around and Kaiba watched it all until finally it was his turn.  
  
Joey, the last person to be asked, looked over at him and grinned. "Okay Kaiba, truth or dare? Take ya pick."  
  
'I despise this game. It's just a stupid way to poke your nose into other people's business and to embarrass them, with an excuse to justify it.' "Truth."  
  
The blonde's grin widened and he rubbed his hands together. "Well then, here's what ya got to answer. When was the last time you went out in public and actually enjoyed yourself? And! Why did you stop?"  
  
Aina was about to protest that this wasn't a good question, but Joey stopped her, still with the grin on his face.  
  
Kaiba sat there with crossed arms and stared at the ground in front of him. "I'm not telling you."  
  
"Come on Kaiba. It's the rules o' the game. Ya gotta answer!"  
  
Seto sent a dead glare over at Joey before staring back at the ground and continuing flatly, "November 15th, seven years ago."  
  
Joey pressed forward. "Well, what happened?"  
  
Kaiba shook his head and continued to stare at the ground. "I'd gone out with Mokuba for the morning. We'd gone around town and had a small shopping spree. Candies, video games, what have you. For lunch we had ice cream cones. Mokuba got chocolate, I got vanilla. I always used to like vanilla because it was never too sweet and never too bland. Once we finished our ice cream Mokuba wanted to go back home, and that was it." He stopped and stared at them all with a blank expression. "That was the last time I enjoyed myself."  
  
"You didn't tell us why you stopped though."  
  
He stared back at the floor and closed his eyes. "You really want to know?"  
  
Joey pressed, "It's the rules of the game, ya gotta answer the full question."  
  
Seto flicked his gaze up to match with that of Joey's and he tied him in as he began to speak once more in his terse voice. "It stopped because when I got home I was given a little gift that I didn't enjoy too much. I doubt you've had the same feeling Wheeler. The feeling that you were wrong to give yourself a little happiness, even on a day when you should be the happiest person alive. But I was wrong Joey, I was wrong, and I've learned from it. That's why, and now I've answered your silly little question, happy?" The last word had a tone of mocking in it as he finally released Joey from his gaze and stood up. Turning on his heel he walked away from them and a soft churning boiled inside him.  
  
'Why did I do that? I should've just walked away in the first place. They never needed to hear about that. Now Tea's going to start thinking I have issues again and-' He stopped walking, already standing next to his car he froze. 'Why am I doing that? I don't love Tea anymore. I don't.. But then why-? In my dream." He shook his head. "No, it's just the night talking. I don't love her. My mind is just tricking me into thinking that I do. When the morning comes I'll realize how foolish these thoughts are and then it will all go back to the way it's supposed to be." 


	4. Sinking

Tea had been dropped off at her house at around midnight. And despite how exhausted she was she couldn't help but toss and turn in her bed as worry prevented her from any chance of sleep.  
  
'He was acting weird. Like, I dunno. But I mean he was practically falling apart. Did he say something about a dream? Maybe it was just some dream that freaked him out. I don't need to worry. It's not my problem.'  
  
She rolled over onto her side, then her back, and the to her other side. 'Why do I have to have such a guilty conscious!' Sitting up she stared at the floor and shook her head. 'It isn't my problem, but I feel like I should fix it. Why do I want to help that jerk so much?'  
  
Absently mindedly Tea started humming the song. 'And what was he talking about with that question? I wonder what happened that day. Arg! It's not my problem! I shouldn't be so worried about it!'  
  
Throwing herself back down onto her pillow she clamped her eyes shut and tried to force herself to stay still. 'I'm going to go to sleep. I'm not going to worry about it. It's not my problem.'  
  
*********************  
  
Seto woke up the next morning after a restless sleep. Putting a hand to his forehead he sighed and shook his head.  
  
'Well that did me absolutely no good.' Slowly rising he went over to his dresser and pulled out what had become his now normal outfit. The black pants, black sleeveless top, and the leather wrist guards. As he was snapping on the bracelets he started thinking again and he stared down at them. 'Why have I been wearing black? Black is for when people are depressed, generally. But I'm not depressed. I'm perfectly happy. Or at least I should be.'  
  
Kaiba smacked his forehead and then made his way onto the balcony. 'But I'm not. And I don't know why. It's probably just a passing feeling; it'll get better with time.' His mind continued to wander and he stared down at the water below. 'I never should have gone to that party last night. I never should have answered that question Joey asked. Why did I have to tell them about my birthday? It was just so stupid. At least they never found out what Gozaburo gave me for a present.'  
  
He propped his leg against the railing and rolled up the bottom of his pant leg to stare at the scar in the shape of a dragon with a KC in place of its chest.  
  
*****************  
  
"Hold still!" Gozaburo shoved the child's leg back down onto the table.  
  
"B-But it hurts." Seto squeezed his eyes shut in pain as the burning metal was placed back onto his ankle.  
  
The owner of Kaiba Corp gave an unmoving smile and pushed the red piece of metal into Seto's flesh a few more times before shoving it back into the fire to heat up again.  
  
The little one chanced a glance at the pattern that was being branded into his skin. He saw the small K and C that had already been put there and stuttered. "Wh-What does th-the KC st-stand for?"  
  
Gozaburo took the small piece of metal out again and pressed it back onto the skin as Seto gave out a small scream. "It stands for Kaiba Corp you dolt. Now stop fidgeting and be quiet or I'll give you something to yell about."  
  
"Y-Yes sir." He stared down at the floor and grimaced as the rest of the pattern was slowly, meticulously, and mercilessly burned into the raw skin of his ankle.  
  
***************  
  
Seto flinched a little as he remembered the feeling and then he rolled the cloth down again. 'They never found out. They never need to know.' He smirked a little. 'Now wasn't that a lovely birthday present? I got to have my foot burned off and limp around for a week.'  
  
He walked back inside and shook his head as he stared at the floor. 'I need something. I don't know what it is though. I'm just, not, happy, anymore.'  
  
Kaiba made his way out the door and down the stairs. Once reaching the bottom of them Mokuba came bounding up and gave him a hug.  
  
"Good morning big brother!"  
  
Seto just nodded and patted the top of Mokuba's head before heading for the door. "I'm going walking. Later."  
  
Mokuba was a little confused as to why his brother was leaving so quickly but he shrugged it off and smiled. "See ya."  
  
*******************  
  
Kaiba was walking down the street with thoughts going through his head and his outer presence getting more and more downtrodden as he went.  
  
'What's missing? I have everything. I don't have to worry about Mokuba, and he's really happy. That generally makes me happy as well, but now it isn't. The company doesn't have any stressful things going on right now; in fact it's been quite calm. And whatever this is, it's not boredom, because then I would just be sitting around doing nothing instead of walking like I am now. So what's missing? I don't know. I just need something. Maybe I should go buy some more cards, then I could make more decks or just add to my current ones. That's what I'll do. Duel Monsters has always made me feel a little better."  
  
*******************  
  
The small bell rang as the shop's door was opened and Seto stepped inside. He ignored the slight glare that Yugi's Grandpa sent him from behind the counter and picked up a couple of cards which he bought and without saying a word he left.  
  
As he was walking down the sidewalk back towards his house he caught something out of the corner of his eye. Turning to face the window he stared inside it and saw Yugi and his friends smiling and laughing about something.  
  
At this he felt his heart sink and he started walking away again. 'Why can't I be like that? Why can't I ever be happy?'  
  
*******************  
  
Tea stopped laughing for a second and blinked out the window. "Hey, is that.?"  
  
Yugi followed her gaze to the empty window and cocked his head. "Is that what Tea?"  
  
She shook her head. "Oh, nothing, I guess my mind is just playing tricks with me." A smile reappeared on her face and she looked back at her friends. 'That couldn't have been Kaiba.'  
  
********************  
  
"Stupid."  
  
Seto kicked the rock a few feet in front of him and took a few more steps to catch up with it.  
  
"Stupid."  
  
He kicked it again and watched it clatter away in front of him.  
  
"Stupid."  
  
Giving it a final shove he slammed it out across the street and saw it stop rolling on the opposite sidewalk.  
  
"It's all just stupid. I don't need these emotions right now. I just want to go back to the way things were."  
  
Shaking his head he ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. "Why do people always have to be so difficult? If they all would just forget the whole thing then it would be so much easier. But then again, it seems I'm the only one that seems to not be able to forget the past."  
  
He gave a frustrated growl and turned into the next store that came up next to him down the street. Skimming his eyes down the aisles he tried to busy his head with statistics of the prices until one item caught his eye.  
  
"I could use one of those." Kaiba stared at the riding crop and smiled slimly as he took the it from the ring it was hanging on and gave it a testing bend. 'Perfect, no blood, no long-lasting effects. Just a quick swish and strike only resulting in maybe a few bruises that no one will be able to see anyway.'  
  
He went to the front counter and bought it before heading out of the store again and making his way home as he looked at the item he had just bought. "No one can get upset with me for this. It's a normal thing, and as I said, it won't really hurt anyone. And as long as Mokuba doesn't know I have it then it'll all be fine. The kid would probably get worried, considering we don't have a horse, or he'd think we were going to get one. Which we aren't. So I'll just have to make sure he doesn't see it."  
  
******************  
  
Swish! Crack!  
  
Seto smiled as the stinging pain sank into his calves. Good, this was good, no one would see him, and no one would care. Now there was no reason for anyone to care, or have pity, or have any sort of emotions towards him. It was just a harmless pain that lasted a few minutes and then it was gone.  
  
Kaiba looked up at the clock and nodded. 'I got home at four, the game took half and hour so that was four thirty, I stopped working at seven, so that means I've been doing this for. three hours.'  
  
Smirking he brought the implement up again and down. He was trying to get the emotions out. Away from him and into something else, if he could accomplish that then everything would be fine.  
  
His dream hadn't fully come to him that night, and every time it showed any sign of coming he'd crack the whip over his legs until it went away. He would have rather attacked his head, but he couldn't get enough force that way. So he had to settle with the one area of his body that could be taken under the full blow, his legs.  
  
He couldn't see them, but he could feel them. His pants softened the sting slightly, and he hadn't changed that since he figured having a barrier could possibly prevent any bruising to occur. But the pain was still there, and he was enjoying every bit of it.  
  
No, cutting had exited from all of his thought process, suicide to go with it as well, but the plain fact of causing pain was still there, and very fresh.  
  
Depression, emotions, feelings of sadness, Kaiba didn't want those. But they sure didn't mind keeping him company.  
  
'I just want to be normal. I just want it all to be okay. Why can't it ever be fine? Why does it always have to be so complicated? Why can't it just for once be able to give me a few moments of happiness that I don't later learn to regret? Maybe I should just give up. Tea hates me. I hate her. I hate her friends. I absolutely hate her. She hates me, and there is absolutely no way in hell's chance that I love her. Because I don't, and if I did then I would just go out and tell her and not sit her and torture myself and.'  
  
Crack!  
  
'Don't doubt, just do. If I doubt myself nothing good ever comes out of it. I don't love Tea. I don't love Tea. I don't love Tea. I absolutely don't love Tea. I don't want to break down right now and call her. I don't want to go over there and tell her I love her. I don't want to hold her just one last time, give her one last kiss, remember how it used to be. I don't. I don't. I just don't. I don't miss her. I don't need her. I don't need anybody. We've decided this. It's already been made, set, put into play. I can't change it, and besides. I don't love her.'  
  
Crack!  
  
'Dammit! I don't! If I did then I WOULD march over there right now and tell her. But I don't. I don't love her!'  
  
Pausing, he looked at the crop that was gripped beneath his whitened knuckles and sighed.  
  
'Tea. Why can't you just come back to me? Give me one more chance. One night, that's all I ask. Give me just one night to remember, bring peace to myself for a few briefs moments. I promise I won't ask again. I need you now. I'm not happy. Nothing's working. Please Tea. help me.'  
  
Seto dropped his head into his hands and clamped his eyes shut resolutely; so as to prevent the salty liquid that was building underneath his lids to come out.  
  
'I just need one night, one more night where I can go to bed in peace. Just one more night where I don't feel like I'm being torn in two. Oh Tea. I'm so sorry.'  
  
Giving in to the wave of emotions that were taking over him he opened his eyes again and let the tears immediately pour out and drip down his face where they seeped into the rug.  
  
"Tea, I miss you. Come back. Please don't leave me Tea. I want you back. I want you back so much. Oh please just come back to me. I need you Tea. I need you. I can't survive without you."  
  
He took the crop in his hand and hurled it across the room where he watched it hit against the wall and drop to the floor.  
  
"I'm a wreck without you. I've even found a new way of punishing myself. That's what I'm doing. I'm not trying to drive the emotions out, or turn things back to the way they used to be. I'm punishing myself. I never should have let you go. I need you back. Please Tea. Don't leave me all by myself. I don't want to be alone!"  
  
Crawling up onto his bed he grabbed one of the pillows and curled up in a ball around it.  
  
"Tea. If there is anyway that you can hear me. Please, just help me. I don't want to be alone. I've been alone for so long. too long. No one ever tried to help me. You used to care. Why can't you still? If you can find it inside your gentle heart to forgive me. I beg you, please do. I'm lost. I'm confused. I don't know what I'm doing anymore, and I can't do anything to stop myself. Tea. help me."  
  
These last words barely escaped Kaiba's lips as a whisper and he hugged the pillow tighter as the tears that were trickling down his face soaked into it. And as soft sobbing shook his chest he buried his head in the item that he was curled around and slowly drifted off into slumber as he cried himself to sleep looking no more than a lost little boy looking for a place to call home, and wandering around blindly with no hopes to find one.  
  
((Sorry about the delay in posting. I've finally fallen into the thing where I'm no longer five chapters ahead of what is posted on the site. So I'll update as soon as I finish every chapter. Review please, and tankies in advance. Later!)) 


	5. Silence

Seto sat up the next morning and rubbed his hands over his eyes. Removing the sheets from on top of him he slung his legs over to edge of the bed and stared at the floor for a few moments as his body slowly caught up with the fact that it was time to get up.  
  
"Tea."  
  
The tears started resurfacing in his eyes and he wiped them off with his sleeve. 'No. Mokuba can't see that I've been crying. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm just fine.'  
  
Standing he dragged himself over to his dresser where he pulled out his dark outfit and changed before heading downstairs to the breakfast table.  
  
Mokuba was already there, happily munching away at a bowl of cereal and he smiled when he saw Seto in the stairwell.  
  
Kaiba gave a half-hearted smirk and went over to the kitchen counter where he grabbed the pot of coffee and started making the fixing for a cup. Finally setting it up he leaned back on the counter and waited as he stared at the floor.  
  
'I can't go over there. She must hate me. There is no way that she'll ever forgive me. I should just forget it. Go on with things being the way they are and stop fooling myself into thinking that I can change it.'  
  
His eyes narrowed and he curled his fingers into his palms. 'I can't give up that easily. I have to at least TRY. If I don't try I know I'll never forgive myself. And besides, even if she does turn me down it won't be that bad.'  
  
Turning he took the pot out of the coffeemaker and poured a glass for himself that he started sipping slowly as he leaned back against the counter once more.  
  
'Sure. It'll be just fine. Being rejected won't be bad at all. I can handle it. I can handle the fact that I'm doomed to be alone for the rest of my life with no one in the world to help me out except for myself. I'll be fine taking care of myself. It's not like I haven't already been doing that. I'm fine with my one shot of happiness being held just out of my grasp to taunt me for the rest of my life and to tear my heart out of my chest for a nice game of hackysack. Sure. I'm fine with that. Tea doesn't need to love Seto Kaiba. I don't need her. She doesn't need me. I'm going to be just fine. Just fine. No problem. I'm happy. Yes. Just perfectly, perfectly happy.'  
  
He raised the mug to his lips and took a sip of the warm liquid inside as the tears once again came to rim his eyelids.  
  
"Brother?"  
  
Seto snapped out of his thought process and looked over at Mokuba's concerned face and wiped his eyes with his finger before giving another halfhearted smile. "Just, um, burnt my tongue." The words choked out of his throat and he knew that it was very visible. So he took a deep breath and tried to smile again unsuccessfully. "I'm going to be back late tonight. Don't wait for me. You can get pizza or something for dinner if you want. See ya."  
  
He put the still pretty full coffee mug down on the countertop and turned away from Mokuba as he headed for the door and tried to bury the droplets in his eyes, but a choice few escaped and made their way down to drip off his chin. 'There's nothing wrong. I'm feeling great. good. fine. Everything is just fine. I'm happy.'  
  
******************  
  
After Mokuba had finished eating his breakfast he ran upstairs and pulled out a small book from underneath his bed. Taking the pen out of the binding he bit off the cap and started scribbling in it as he sat on his bed using his leg as a table:  
  
Hey Journal,  
  
It's me again. I was just downstairs and talking to Seto. I think something's wrong with him. Somehow I'm getting the impression that he was crying, but he won't tell me about it. He never tells me anything that might get me worried. I know he's just doing it so that I'll have less stress, but I feel helpless. Seto's always helping me so much and I can never really do anything for him. The last couple of days he's been walking even more than usual, going out early and coming back sort of late. I really think something is wrong. I just wish he'd tell me what it was. Awe well, there's really nothing that I can do. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens. If this just blows over then it'll be great, but for now I'll keep smiling and make him think I'm all carefree and happy. It never helps somebody to get sad when they're sad. And Seto tries to keep my life worry free. Later now, I'm going to go back and play Nintendo!  
  
********************  
  
The lump inside Seto's throat had firmly planted itself there as he let the crystalline salt particles dry on his face.  
  
'I can't cry. I can't cry. Only the weak cry. I'm not weak. I'm not weak. I'm happy. Yes, that's it. I'm happy.'  
  
He frowned and clenched his fists as he glared at the grass he was sitting on as another small drop sneaked out of his eye.  
  
'I'm happy. I'm NOT sad. I'm HAPPY!'  
  
Closing his eyes he shook his head and gritted his teeth.  
  
'No I'm not. I'm just so stupid, just so very stupid. I shouldn't feel this way. I don't deserve it. I don't need it. Tea doesn't want me. Tea doesn't want me. Tea does not want me. Get that through your thick skull Seto. She hates you. And you are SUPPOSED to hate her. If you can just get it into the stupid head of yours that you don't like her then you will be happy. Happy.'  
  
However much he had been telling himself that, trying to convince himself that it was really true. It stung and clawed at his heart.  
  
'Cards. I should get more cards. Those help. I gave the others to Mokuba anyway. Cards will make me happy.'  
  
He got up and brushed himself off before heading down the small hill he was sitting on near the baseball field. Wiping more fugitive tears away from his eyes he headed down the sidewalk towards the game shop.  
  
*****************  
  
"Hey Gramps! We're outta pop and I was wondering if you wanted me to get some.. more.." Joey's voice trailed off as he came out of the back and into the main store with an empty can of soda in his hand.  
  
Kaiba looked back over his shoulder from where he was about to go out the door and sent a mild glare at the blonde.  
  
"Um. hey Kaiba. What are you doing here?"  
  
Seto took a few cards out of his pocket and held them up before shoving them back and going out the door.  
  
Joey soon followed after and leaned over to look at his face. "Somethin' wrong dude? Looks like you've been crying."  
  
A low growl came from Seto's chest and he shook his head glaring at the sidewalk.  
  
"Um. okay then. You wanna talk about it?"  
  
'Yeah. Sure. Like you really care Joey. Just shut up and mind your own business.' He shook his head.  
  
"Are you sure?" The blonde raised an eyebrow.  
  
'Yes I'm sure!' Kaiba sent a death glare through his red-rimmed eyes and continued walking as Joey followed along.  
  
"Well at least SAY something."  
  
'No. I'm fine. I'm happy. Happy. I'm h-a-p-p-y, happy.' Another unwanted tear squeezed its way out of Seto's eyes, which he quickly wiped away. He opened his mouth to tell the blonde off but the words choked in his throat and he closed it again.  
  
"Earth to Kaiba? Hello?"  
  
'Leave me alone Joey.' He narrowed his eyes again and tried to burry more unshed tears as he gritted his teeth and attempted ignoring the blonde next to him.  
  
Joey, loosing his ability and tolerance of being ignored, grabbed Kaiba's shoulders and jerked him to face him. "Say something dammit!"  
  
'Leave. Me. ALONE! Just forget it Joey! I'm supposed to be alone. I'm happy this way. It's the way things works and the way they are supposed to be. So forget it and leave me alone. I. Am. Happy!' His narrowed eyes formed slits and he clenched his jaw tight.  
  
"Talk!" Joey gave him a fierce shake but was still rewarded by silence. Shoving the executive backwards away from him he threw his arms up in the air. "What is UP with you dude?!"  
  
'There is nothing "up" with me Joey. Everything is down. But you know what? It's not all that bad. I've accepted that I'm going to be by myself. So just but out and forget it. Here I'll even give you these to shut up.' Approaching the blonde he reached into his pocket and shoved his entire deck into Joey's hands before storming off down the sidewalk.  
  
"What the.?" Joey stared at the cards in his hands and turned it over so he could see the card faces. 'His blue eyes? Why did he give me his blue eyes?' Baffled and confused he stood there blinking for a few moments and then headed off after Kaiba again. "Kaiba! Kaiba, wait up!"  
  
Seto stopped and turned to face Joey who quickly caught up and held out the deck.  
  
"You forgot your cards."  
  
'No I didn't moron. There's no point to duel monsters. There's no point in anything. I'm just an empty shell with nothing to give to the world. Nothing at all.' Another tear managed to squeeze out of his eye and he didn't even bother with it. 'Take them. I don't care. I am nothing and I deserve nothing. I don't deserve Tea. She's too good for me. I am nothing to her. So please just leave me alone to be the pitiful worm I am. I'm happy this way.' Turning again he sent one last gaze over at Joey and left.  
  
*********************  
  
Joey walked back into the game shop with the cards in his hands blinking at them. 'I don't get it. He comes in and is buying cards, and then he goes and gives them to me. along with his Whole deck! What's up with that?'  
  
"Hey Joey. Where'd you go?" Yugi's voice piped up when he noticed his friend walking back into the room and his eyes went down to the cards in Joey's hands. "Where'd you get those?"  
  
Still half lost in his bewildered world Joey sat on the couch and blinked. "Um.. Kaiba was buying some cards, and like, he was upset. So I went to check it out and well.. look." He pulled the rare card out of his deck and showed it to his friends.  
  
Tristan's eyes spread wide. "What did you do? Mug him?"  
  
The blonde shook his head. "No, he, um, gave them to me. And I tried to give them back but he wouldn't take them." Leaning back on the couch he pondered. "It was kinda weird actually."  
  
Tristan snatched the cards out of his hand and shuffled through them. "Holy crap. This IS his deck. And what do you mean he just "gave" it to you?"  
  
"Ya know.. like the voluntary act of putting the cards in my hand and then walking away. Get it?"  
  
"But. Why?" The brunette raised and eyebrow in confusion.  
  
Joey shrugged. "Beats me. He wouldn't say nothin' either. That was the weird thing. But hey, anyway, now I gots me some great cards!" He snatched the deck back from Tristan and shoved it in his pocket with a grin.  
  
Yugi cocked his head curiously. "Joey, you aren't really going to keep the cards are you?"  
  
He shrugged again. "And why shouldn't I? He gave 'em to me."  
  
"Well. I guess so." His violet eyes fell to the floor and worry creased his forehead.  
  
"Yo, whatcha thinkin'? That I'm going to become some crazy possessed power hog? Nah, I'm just gonna use his deck in combo with mine. Then it'll all be the same. 'Cept I'm kinda juiced up. Then maybe I'll have a bit of a chance in a duel with ya Yug."  
  
Yugi gave a smile at his friend and shook his head. "No. It's not that. It just doesn't seem very much like Kaiba to do that sort of thing. We all know he's very attached to his blue eyes. It's just strange that he'd give them up so easily, that's all." He shrugged carelessly and smiled again before looking over at Tea. "Don't you think so?"  
  
"Huh? What?" Tea's head jerked up from staring at the floor to staring at her friends, obviously been lost in her own thoughts.  
  
"Did you hear ANYTHING that we just said?" Joey questioned.  
  
"Oh, um, not really. but I gotta go anyway. See ya!" Quickly getting up she left her three friends staring after her and Joey looked to the other two.  
  
"Did I miss something?"  
  
Tristan grabbed him in a headlock and messed up his already hopeless hair. "Knowing you you'd miss if this house fell down on your head."  
  
Joey tried to yank his head out unsuccessfully and then set to trying to stretch out Tristan's face instead in hopes to achieve freedom that way.  
  
Yugi just rolled his eyes. "You guys." He smiled and would have enjoyed the moment more if the worried look on Tea's face could've made its way out of his thoughts.  
  
********************  
  
"Brother!" Mokuba vaulted over the back of the couch and grabbed onto Seto's legs. When he received barely any reaction to the gesture he looked up at his older sibling. "Something wrong?"  
  
Kaiba gently unlatched Mokuba's hands from around him and shook his head to the question before heading towards the stairs.  
  
Mokuba's brow furrowed and his expression became more worried. "Aren't we gonna play our game?"  
  
Just before Seto disappeared behind the wall he shook his head again and then went away.  
  
"Um. okay then. I guess I'll. see you later then." The younger Kaiba talked to the open air behind his brother and then heard the doorbell ring. Breaking from his worried mood he ran over to the door and opened it.  
  
"Tea? Heya! What are you doing here?" His face smiled at the surprise of her. It had been a long while since she had visited.  
  
Tea looked worried and was wringing her hands distractedly and trying to peek glances inside. "Um, hey. Is your brother home?"  
  
"Sure! Come on in. I'll go get him." Flashing another smile he swung the door wide before running off the fetch Seto.  
  
*****************  
  
'I'm nothing. I'm nothing. I am nothing. I deserve nothing. I don't deserve anything. I'm just a pathetic, stupid, sniveling little shrimp. who deserves nothing.. But I'm happy with that. I'm happy. It's the way things are supposed to be because I am nothing. I deserve nothing. I am nothing.'  
  
Seto sat on his bed, leaning against the headboard as his legs curled into his chest and he silently drove himself further and further down.  
  
'Nothing. That's what I am. I'm a grimy slug and I deserve to be. I'm a microscopic flea put on this earth to be ignored and given nothing to live for. And I'm happy. I am nothing, and I'm happy with that. Life is the way it should be because I am nothing. I'm nothing. I'm absolutely nothing, just worthless pond scum that's good for nothing more than being pond scum.'  
  
He'd beat his legs for a few minutes, but had found that he didn't even have the heart for that. He didn't want to do anything except what he was doing now. Convincing himself of what he was, driving it into his skull until there was no other possible thing that he could believe except for what he was telling himself.  
  
'I don't deserve anything. Everyone deserves more than me. I'm just stupid, idiotic, pathetic Seto who only deserves to be pounded into the dust. I am nothing. I am nothing. I'm nothing. Absolutely nothing. I'm noth-'  
  
"Seto?" A muffled voice came from behind the door and Kaiba got up and opened it to stare down at Mokuba.  
  
Mokuba looked up at his brother's distressed face a moment and then at the floor. "Um, someone's here to see you."  
  
Kaiba shut the door behind him and wandered down the stairs without saying a word to Mokuba who went and disappeared into his own room.  
  
********************  
  
'Why am I here? I've told myself over and over again that it's not my problem. Oh well, just my guilty conscious. Once I see everything is fine I'll leave again. It was stupid to come over here in the first place. I know that nothing's wrong, and besides. It's not even my problem.'  
  
Tea twiddled her thumbs as she sat on the couch waiting downstairs. Until the somber figure came into view at the end of the stairwell and she flashed a nervous smile.  
  
"Eheh, hey Kaiba. What's up?"  
  
********************  
  
'Tea? Tea?! What is TEA doing here? Oh god. Oh my god. Seto you stupid idiot. Just leave right now. Tell her to leave. You're no good for her. She's better than you and you know it. Why would she like a pathetic insect like me anyway? There's no reason why she should. I was a fool to ever think I was even remotely good enough for her in the first place. But oh god. What is TEA doing HERE? Of all the people. of all the places. Why Tea? Why here?'  
  
********************  
  
'Why is he just standing there? He hasn't even moved! I mean he should at least have said 'hello' or something. Oh, he must hate me. I never should have come. What were you thinking you stupid girl Tea? Coming to Kaiba's house. Tcha! THAT was a good idea.'  
  
********************  
  
'She's staring at me like some sort of alien. I knew it. She still hates me. Of course, what was I thinking? Of course she hates me. I HATE myself! I HATE myself! God I'm such an idiot! Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!'  
  
********************  
  
Tea slanted her head as she saw Kaiba lean his head against the wall and softly start banging it. Breaking out of her frozen state she walked over and shyly took him away from the wall.  
  
"Um. you're going to give yourself a headache."  
  
She flashed a very small smile and then went to sit over on the couch and stared at the cushions.  
  
*********************  
  
'What? She CARES?! No. She doesn't care. I know she doesn't. It's just Tea being Tea and not wanting people to hurt themselves. Shit! I didn't mean to start doing that! Now she must think I hate her even more, and she must hate ME even more for hating her. Right, heh, what does she care about dumb old Seto Kaiba? She doesn't. I should just stop fooling myself and go back upstairs and let her get the hint that she should leave. Because I know she hates me, and if she didn't hate me then she would've said so and not just stood there gaping at me. Stupid Seto! Stupid Seto! Why did you ever think that she did in the first place?'  
  
Without noticing it his feet had traveled him over so that he was sitting down on the couch next to Tea and he was holding his face as he rested his elbows on his thighs. When he finally noticed it was when he felt a hand rest on his shoulder and he let go of his face to stare over at Tea.  
  
'What are you doing Tea? You know we're supposed to hate each other. Loathe each other. It's not supposed to work this way. I-. I-.'  
  
Falling back into his hands he shielded his face and tried to hide the tears that had started coming out of his eyes between his fingers.  
  
'Tea. Please let go. Please take your hand away. It's too painful. I miss you, and I don't want you to leave again. but I know it's for the best. Oh please, just leave me alone in my misery. I love you, and it hurts so much. It hurts so much to let you go.'  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
Seto nodded slowly. 'Please go Tea. I'm begging you. Find happiness with somebody who deserves it. not somebody like me.'  
  
"You sure?"  
  
Another nod. 'Please. just go. I am nothing. I'm worthless. I'm a pathetic worm who should be buried in all my solitude. I don't deserve to live. I deserve to die. I deserve to die. I am nothing.' Without realizing it he had moved one of his hands over the other's wrist and started sinking his nails into the skin.  
  
"Uh. Kaiba." Tea reached over and took his hand away from it. She was confused at why as soon as she did this he looked away and grimaced. "Oh sorry, did I hurt you?"  
  
'No. You didn't. I just. please leave Tea. I'm nothing. I'm no good for you. You shouldn't even be wasting your time on someone like me. I'm nothing. nothing at all.' Seto continued looking away from her and shook his head slightly before she turned his head back around and stared at his face worried.  
  
"You know. You don't look so good."  
  
'What do you mean I don't look so good? I'm fine. I'm happy. I'm happy being nothing. I'm no good for you Tea. Please just go. If you won't, I will. You deserve better than me. Angel's deserve the world, not what shouldn't even be alive.' Seto slowly stood from off the couch and took his hand away from Tea's sending her a tearful glance before heading back up to his room.  
  
******************  
  
"Um. well. Okay then." Tea stood up in confusion. 'Why isn't he saying anything? Not any 'hello', not even a 'go away', or a 'leave me alone'. Why?'  
  
Slowly developing more worry in her mind she made her way up the stairs after Seto a few minutes later.  
  
Knocking on the door gently she quietly spoke through the door.  
  
"Kaiba? Are you in there?"  
  
There was no answer so she opened the door a crack and peered in.  
  
"Kaiba?"  
  
The room was dark, very dark. Tea noticed this as she walked in. The curtains were drawn over the windows and the only way that she could make out the huddled form in the corner was by the shivering breaths coming from him.  
  
Cautiously stepping forward in the gloomy atmosphere she made her way over to him and kneeled down. "Um, Kaiba?"  
  
There was no response from him so she gave his shoulders a gentle shake. "Kaiba? Are you okay?"  
  
There was still no answer so she shook him a little harder. "Come on. answer me. Please?"  
  
Nothing.  
  
"Seto.?"  
  
She caught a glimpse of his body tensing and slid into the small space next to him in the corner. "Are you at least going to say something?"  
  
********************  
  
Kaiba shook his head and stood up. 'Please leave Tea. I am nothing. I deserve nothing. Not even your concern.'  
  
He started heading over towards the balcony and Tea followed him until he was almost through the door when she yanked him back and pushed him against the wall and voiced warily, "Kaiba."  
  
Seto's eyes locked into hers. 'What do you think I'm going to do Tea? Jump? I wouldn't do that to you. I'd never want to make you sad. I'd never do that to-.' He cupped his hand over the one she had on his shoulder and gave a longing sigh. 'I'd never do that to somebody I love.'  
  
*****************  
  
'What?' Tea stared at his hand over hers and blinked a few times then stared at his face. 'Seto. What wrong with you? I know something's wrong. But you aren't saying anything. I can't help if I have no clue of what's going inside that head of yours.'  
  
"Kaiba, please tell me what's bothering you?"  
  
'You're looking at me so strange. Like you need something and- Hey!'  
  
*****************  
  
Seto had scooped Tea up in his arms and was walking her out of the room and down the stairs.  
  
Upon reaching the front door he put her down on the outside and stared at her blankly.  
  
'Tea. You need to go. I can't have you here. It's too painful to even look at you knowing that I don't deserve it. Please just go.'  
  
He gave her hand a little squeeze and locked eyes with her for a split second before closing the door behind her and heading back towards the stairwell.  
  
******************  
  
Back up in his room he traveled over to his bed and lay down on it staring at the ceiling and shaking his head as his thoughts lingered on Tea. 'Angel's need no worries little princess. Don't waste your time on me.'  
  
((Okay, that wasn't especially the best last part. but hey ^_^ I tried! And it's a new chapter for you besides. Keep reviewing now!)) 


	6. Help

((Okay, sorry peeps for taking so long. School, volleyball, just got the works up so not as much time to type, not to mention a little spout of writer's block O.o But anyway, for the one review that said my chapter was getting kind of sappy. I only have on thing to say, if you dun like it, dun read it, and dun tell me about it. Just the little reminder of no flames, I wouldn't mind so much but I get paranoid that everyone else thinks the same thing. and that doesn't help. So ANYWAY, that's all I gots to say for now. Read on!. oh, p.s. a little forewarning, might be some sort of icky junk in this chapter.. Not the most original idea I've ever had, but it still might get a little, um, weird . ))  
  
Mokuba was sitting at the lunch table to next day eating the turkey sandwich his brother had made him. Looking up from his food he stared over at the older one who was leaning against the counter with his arms crossed staring at the floor.  
  
"Seto?"  
  
Kaiba's head came up and looked over at him so Mokuba continued.  
  
"Um.. The company called this morning. They were wondering what happened to you... Since, you like, haven't been working and stuff... And I was also kind of wondering, are you feeling okay?"  
  
There was no answer, just the resounding silence that had been drifting through the mansion for the last two days. After a few minutes Mokuba started getting fidgety and decided to go onto something else.  
  
"Well, um, anyway... Wanna play a game?" He flashed his best smile and pulled some cards out of his pocket. "I added what you gave me yesterday to my deck. I think it's pretty good and I'd like to try it out.. If you wouldn't mind that is..."  
  
Seto stared at him blankly and shrugged.  
  
"But brother... Why not?"  
  
Kaiba shrugged again and left to go back up into his room.  
  
Mokuba watched him leave with a distressed face. 'Why doesn't he want to play with me? I know!' Jumping up the younger Kaiba grabbed his coat and headed out the door.  
  
****************  
  
"Um. I'd like that one, and um. that one." Mokuba pointed out the cards under the glass case. He'd picked up a few common ones, but he figured that his brother would like the more rare, more powerful, ones the best.  
  
As Grandpa was ringing the price up there was a voice from the back.  
  
"Blue Eyes White Dragon in attack mode!"  
  
Mokuba's head drifted to the side as he tried to get a better view and caught a glimpse of Joey and Yugi dueling on the floor. Giving the money to Yugi's grandfather he took the bag and wandered into the room to stare at the game going on.  
  
Yugi looked from behind his handful of cards and smiled. "Oh hi Mokuba. What brings you here?"  
  
He returned the smile and sat down to look at the duel going on. "I just bought some cards." His eyes fell back to the duel. "So who's winning?"  
  
Joey smiled proudly. "Me!"  
  
"That's cool. With wha-" Mokuba's eyes locked down onto the current monster the blonde had on the field and they grew wide and then narrowed as he lifted his gaze again at Joey. "How did you get that?"  
  
"Oh, didn't he tell you? You're brother gave 'em to me."  
  
The younger Kaiba's eyes slitted further. "You're lying. Now give them back."  
  
Joey's expression became slightly confused. "But Mokuba, he gave them to me."  
  
"I don't care how you got them. Just. Give. Them. Back." Reaching forward he took the one card off of the field. "All of them. Now."  
  
****************  
  
Yugi was bandaging up Joey's hand and shook his head. "I told you, you shouldn't have kept those cards."  
  
The blonde winced and took his hand away once it was done. "Well I didn't know he was going to bite me. It's not like this happens to me every day ya know.."  
  
Yugi couldn't help but smile as he rolled his eyes. "Well, that's what you get for messing with a member of the Kaiba family."  
  
Joey glared at him. "Hey, you're supposed to be on my side."  
  
This was answered with a shrug and another smile. "It's the truth though."  
  
Letting the thing go Joey went onto other thoughts of moping. "We didn't even get to finish our duel.. And I was winning too!"  
  
Yugi rolled his eyes and patted his blonde friend's shoulder. "I don't think you would've been really happy if you'd won anyway. You should win with what you've earned Joey. You're a great duelist whether or not you have really rare cards or not."  
  
"Heh, thanks Yug."  
  
((sorry bout that seen, not the best.. but had to do something))  
  
***********************  
  
"Seto!"  
  
Mokuba came running into the house waving the cards proudly in the air.  
  
"Seto! Brother! I got something to show you!"  
  
Taking the stairs two at a time he burst into the little black hole that was his older sibling's room and flicked on the light switch. Making another little dash he launched onto the bed and bounced a couple of times as he gave a wide grin to the blank expression that was receiving him.  
  
"Guess what I got for ya?"  
  
There was no answer to him, but he continued all the same. Reaching his hand forward he shoved the recovered deck into his brother's face and smiled even wider. "I got your deck back! Aren't you happy?"  
  
Still nothing and Mokuba's expression sank some. "Brother... aren't you glad I got your cards back?"  
  
The head looked away from him and his heart sank a little more. "Big brother, are you okay?"  
  
No reply, no answer, just silence causing the small one's world to drop further. "Are you mad at me?"  
  
"..."  
  
Mokuba's soft crystal eyes tried to meet with the swirling orbs of the one sitting on the bed unsuccessfully. Crawling down off the bed he put the cards down on the stand next to it before slowly making his way to the door. As he opened it up he sent a glance back at his brother. 'I'm sorry Seto. I was only trying to help... I just wanted to be a good little brother to you...'  
  
*********************  
  
Tea walked out of Joey's late that night and waved back to her friends.  
  
"See you later guys!"  
  
Tristan and Yugi were going to sleep over, but Tea had to go home because her parents were going on another trip the next day and they wanted to spend as much time with her before they left.  
  
As she decided to take the long route home through the park, she was walking over one of the bridges when a shadowed figured stepped out from behind a tree...  
  
*********************  
  
'I should've said something... but the words... they just won't come out. I tried to tell him, but I couldn't... I hope he's not too upset. I should've just said something...'  
  
Seto had actually decided to go out that night ignoring the feeling that his dream would decide to come at the absolute worst time possible... But he needed some time out of the house.  
  
'Maybe I should just give up on this whole thing. Try to swallow what little pride I may have left and put up a fake act of happiness. I am nothing. I've established that. But I have no reason, and no right to drag others down with me... Why does Mokuba always have to be so worried about me? Why does ANYONE ever have to be worried about me? If they all would just ignore me and leave me alone then no one would be upset. They all would be happy... More than I deserve. But that's what I'll do... Force my self to look happy so that no one can tell the difference. Maybe I should just-'  
  
"HELP!"  
  
'What?' His head jerked up from staring at the ground and to his left as the cry reached his ears.  
  
*******************  
  
"HELP! SOMEBODY!"  
  
"Shut up!" A hand clasped over her mouth as the strange man ran his tongue over her ear and gave a vicious grin. As his other hand slowly worked away at undoing her braw underneath her shirt while he still tried to stop her from struggling.  
  
Tea tried to kick backwards with her foot but found that the man's leg wrapped around hers to stop its process and he did likewise with the other before she could even move it. Giving a sly chuckle he whispered into her ear.  
  
"What's a beauty like you doing out on a night like this? You should know better... Let me take you home to my nice warm bed and you can get nice and cozy there."  
  
All Tea could do was let out a muffled, high-pitched shriek as she felt the man pulling her backwards into the bushes.  
  
Breaking through the foliage, she was shoved down onto the ground as the man jumped on top of her and gnawed at her neck until...  
  
"Tea!"  
  
The last thing that entered her vision was the blurry form accompanied with a familiar voice before her head spun and everything went black. 


	7. Escaping Reality

"Tea... Why do you haunt me? Why does it seem that everywhere I go you come to follow me? Is it that I really want to be with you? Is it that my life isn't complete without you? My heart aches, but my head doesn't know why. None of this makes any sense. I never want you to leave me, but I feel like I'm holding a butterfly. Too fragile to keep, but too strong to let the wind sway its course... Please forgive me for all the wrongs I've done to you. Of all the people I've ever known, you were the most special. I'd hate to loose you... Maybe I'm just scared. Maybe I'm confused. But I know that I love you. I'm just afraid to let myself truly care for you since almost everyone I've ever been close to has left me. I've never admitted this to anyone, not even Mokuba, but... I really don't have any idea what I'm doing. I may always seem so sure, but I'm not. And of all the stupid things I've done in that past... Letting you go was the biggest. I know you can't hear me. I know that you're fast asleep and will be leaving soon... But I had to tell you. I had to tell you that, no matter what happens, and no matter how cold and selfish I may seem... I'm going to watch out for you, and make sure you're safe. Even if you find someone else to make you happy, I'll still take care of you. You may not even notice it, but I'm always going to be there for you Tea. I'll always going to come for you little princess..."  
  
********************  
  
"Mm... What?" Tea sat up groggily in her bedroom as the sun sent its blinding rays streaming in. Just as she was about to swing her covers off the chipper face of Yugi popped around the corner.  
  
"I see you're up. Feeling better?" Walking fully into the room he sat down next to her on the bed and gave a cheery smile.  
  
"Wha happened?" Rubbing at her eyes she tried to come back into reality.  
  
"You're parents asked me to pop over and keep an eye on you until you woke up. They had to leave for their flight so they couldn't stay. Do you want some soup?" Hopping up before he heard an answer he started heading for the door. "I'll get you some. Be right back!"  
  
Tea watched him disappear out of the room and blinked a couple times around the room as thoughts ran through her mind. 'Last I remember I was being attacked by that... guy, and someone showed up to save me.' Closing her eyes she tilted her head curiously. 'But who was it?' Leaning back onto her pillow she sighed and opened her eyes again. 'Whoever you are, thank you. I'll try to pay you back someday if I ever find you.'  
  
***********************  
  
"No..." Seto slammed the phone back down on the receiver for the umteenth time in the last hour as he leaned back in his desk chair. 'She's fine. I made sure she got to her parents house safe and sound. But, I should make sure...' Picking up the phone once more he hovered his finger over the keys. 'But what if she doesn't believe me? What if-'  
  
"No..." The phone went back down and he tapped his fingers agitatedly down on the desk top. 'There wasn't any real damage done. She just passed out from exhaustion, too much adrenaline, too much fear at once. But... I should at least check.' The item of choice went back to his hand and he got as far as the first three numbers before it returned to the receiver.  
  
"No..." 'She's going to be just fine. She only passed out, nothing more. A few bruises maybe, but nothing serious. Maybe I should just, though...' The endless list of doubts and whims passed through his brain, as he was oblivious to the small set of eyes watching him through the minuscule crack in the doorway.  
  
*******************  
  
"Doo dee doo dee doo..." Yugi hummed to himself as he stirred the soup on the stove.  
  
Ring. Ring. Ring.  
  
Reaching over he grabbed the phone and shoved it to his ear as he continued stirring.  
  
"Gardner's."  
  
"Hey Yugi!"  
  
"Oh, hi Mokuba, what are you calling for?... Oh, wait. Hold on a second." He took the soup off the burner and poured it into a bowl as he also placed it on a tray and readjusted the phone again. "Okay, so what's up?"  
  
"I wanted to see how Tea was, is she there?"  
  
"Yup." Walking up the stairs he put the tray down next to her bed and then took the phone away from his ear and held it out to her. "Tea, phone for you."  
  
"Mm..." Tea had since lied back down on the bed and started going back to sleep. Now she rolled over and took the phone from Yugi. "Hello?"  
  
"Feeling better?"  
  
She blinked a couple of times. "Um... yeah, guess so. Why?"  
  
"No reason. Thanks!"  
  
The heard the phone click and then the dial tone. Handing it back to Yugi she gave a little shrug and lay back down on the bed. "All done... Goodnight."  
  
Yugi smiled. "I'll leave the soup there for you if you want it. Sleep well." Walking out of the room he closed the door behind him and leaned against it. 'I wonder how Mokuba knew about Tea? Hm. Awe well. Maybe he was just seeing how she was in general. No biggie.'  
  
*******************  
  
"SetoSetoSetoSetoSeto!"  
  
Mokuba skipped up the stairs two by two and bounded into his brother's office where he jumped onto his older siblings lap with a big smile.  
  
"Seto!"  
  
Kaiba stared at him blankly and gave a small I-don't-want-to-deal-with-this- right-now sigh. "What is it Mokuba?"  
  
The grin grew wider all the same as Mokuba turned around on his brother's lap and looked over the screen to see what his brother was working on.  
  
"Oh not much." Minimizing the window that was up he opened up solitaire as he mentioned idly, "Tea's feeling fine in case you were wondering."  
  
"What?" Seto blinked a couple times at the back of the little one's head. "How did you-"  
  
"Later!" Mokuba hopped off his lap again and walked out the door with a smile still planted on his features.  
  
********************  
  
A few moments after, Seto smirked and shook his head. 'Thanks Mokuba.'  
  
Opening up the window on his screen again he finished the program before closing it again and shutting the computer down. He'd just started working again that day, and after a few well-planted excuses for his absence everything was running smoothly again. As he got up from his desk the solitary question that had been racking away at his brain ever since the night before resurfaced again.  
  
'Why do I have to be so worthless. and Tea has to be so perfect? Or maybe I should maybe just go by that whole beauty is in the eye of the beholder ruse.' He let a sigh escape his lips and got up to walk down the stairs and lean against the kitchen counter. 'I wonder where she is now?' Seto narrowed his eyes. 'I should just forget about her. But... I don't- I just- ... I promised her. And I'm going to keep that promise.'  
  
Getting up again he walked out the door and down the sidewalk in the direction of the game shop.  
  
*********************  
  
"So what are you doing tonight?"  
  
"Oh, not much. Serenity's comin' over for a visit so I figured we'd rent a movie or somethin'" Joey shrugged and kept staring at the TV as he answered Yugi's question.  
  
Tristan glanced from where he was on the floor. "Hey, can I hang with you guys?"  
  
The blonde shrugged. "Sure, why not? Glad to have ya."  
  
Yugi shrugged. "I can't come. Grandpa wants me to do some inventory." He rolled his eyes. "Awe well, it's only every once in a while. But I like the help when I can. What are you gonna do Tea?"  
  
"Hm.. I think I'll probably go shopping, cruise around town a bit." She smiled. "I haven't had my monthly dose of cash binging yet this month."  
  
Joey reached into his pocket and pulled out a little card and handed it to her. "Try this place, they got some cool clothes that you might like..."  
  
"Why do YOU have a card to a women's clothes store?" Tristan's face looked half afraid and half ready to break out laughing.  
  
The blonde sent him a death glare. "Serenity gave it to me ya nimrod."  
  
Yugi smiled and rolled his violet eyes. "Sure Joey."  
  
"She did!"  
  
"Sure Joey."  
  
"But she did!"  
  
"Sure Joey."  
  
*********************  
  
"Hm... Should it be the black top, or the red?" Tea held the new clothes over her body as she looked in the mirror. "I think... red." With a smile she put changed into it and then looked at her completed outfit in the full body image that replicated her. Knee-high black zipper boots with a short black mini skirt. Plus the selected scarlet tube top and a silver cross on a chain for her necklace.  
  
"Perfect!" With a happy bounce she headed down the stairs and grabbed the keys before she was out the door.  
  
*********************  
  
Seto leaned against the back wall of the nightclub. Okay, so it might have been a little weird for him to be here. But he'd walked around a little and had decided he needed to be around people. This was the closest revenue that he could think of, and the most likely for him to be able to just lean back on the wall and be ignored.  
  
The thing that surprised him though, was when Tea walked through the doors. He couldn't help but laugh. 'Tea's here. Don't the forces of fate love playing with my heart strings? Maybe she won't notice me...' His eyes wandered around the shadowed corner and he smirked. 'Very likely she won't. Awe well...' Crossing his arms he shook his head. 'We'll just stay here...'  
  
*********************  
  
"Mm... Zesty!" Tea took her first glass of punch out of the bowl. Of course she was feeling pretty thirsty after dancing around for an hour without getting anything to drink, so she took another few glasses and headed out once again to the dance floor.  
  
**********************  
  
'That's odd...' Kaiba's gaze had been filtering over in Tea's direction for most of the night. He didn't find it weird that Tea kept drinking lots of punch, but the thing that was bothering him now was that she seemed to be getting unsteady on her feet. Not a very likely thing to happen to someone who studies dance and can go for hours on end without getting really tired.  
  
His conscious sent him a pang to his brain to go find out what was happening so he left his corner and headed over to the punch table.  
  
Pouring himself a glass he took a sip and then sniffed it. 'Alcohol, how juvenile.' Throwing the rest of the cup into the trashcan he walked over to Tea who was talking to a group of guys in the corner and giggling like crazy.  
  
Seto took a step in next to her and put his hand on her shoulder while talking to the other males.  
  
"Excuse me. I need to borrow her for a minute."  
  
One of them folded his arms hautily. "Why should we?"  
  
A smile crept onto the CEO's face as he turned her away and started walking away to the other corner. "Because, I'm her boyfriend."  
  
*********************  
  
Reaching the corner he put either hand on her shoulder and stared into her somewhat hazy eyes.  
  
"Tea? How are you feeling?"  
  
She smiled and giggled. "I didn't know you were my boyfriend." Stumbling sideways she fell onto his shoulder and stared up into his eyes with another giggle. "I sure have a pretty boyfriend."  
  
'Oh my god you're wasted...' Rolling his eyes he put her arm over his shoulder and started leading her to the door while talking to her.  
  
"I'm going to take you home. Okay Tea? We'll get you a little more sober back there... I can't imagine what sort of a hangover you're going to have in the morning."  
  
Another silly giggled answered him. "I can hangover!"  
  
"Ack! Tea!" He tried to hold her up as she let her body go limp and then she smiled at him.  
  
"See? I good hangover!"  
  
With another roll of the eyes he pushed open the door and walked down the sidewalk some in the direction of the parking lot.  
  
"Yes Tea, I see that." He looked down at her and noticed her eyes dropping so he took one of his hands and gave her face a little tap. "Try to stay awake till we get to the house. You can sleep once we get there..."  
  
"Sleep is goooood."  
  
"Yes, sleep is good. But try to stay awake." He dragged her over to the passenger's side of his car and opened the door for her. Helping her to slide in he put on her seatbelt and then walked over to his side and turned on the ignition.  
  
***********************  
  
Pulling into the front driveway he got out and opened her door.  
  
"Tea? We're here. I'm gonna take you inside now, okay?"  
  
She giggled. "I like inside."  
  
"I'm sure you do..." Reaching his arm underneath hers he helped her stand and then inside the house onto the couch.  
  
"Now you just stay here. I'll go get you some water."  
  
Tea smiled at him. "I like my boyfriend..."  
  
A slim smile traced his face as he left to go into the kitchen.  
  
Opening up the cabinets he looked for a glass and finally found one. Another glass item caught his eye on the top shelf. Taking it down he looked at the bottle and smirked. 'Vodka...' His eyes wandered back to Tea who had since lied down on the couch and was giggling at the ceiling. 'Why do I always have to run into her everywhere? Why can't I just forget it all and-' He smiled and looked at the vodka again. 'Why not? It's just one night.'  
  
((BWAHAHAHAHAAA!!! ^_^;;; Sorry bout that... But doesn't this sound fun? And I love weekends, lots of time to type... Anyway, typing to more I go. Review! If any of you have suggestions of thing I should do then you can tell me in reviews =) I'm always open to some ideas... Later!)) 


	8. The Morning After

((Once again it is the weekend ^_^ Meaning I get to type! Okie, you all are probably DYING to know what happened with the lovely Vodka. so here ya go!))  
  
"Oh, my head..." Seto sat up with a throbbing pain pulsing through his temples and squinted around the unfamiliar room. "Where am I?" His eyes fell to a sleeping form lying next to him and spread wide. "Holy Shit!"  
  
He jumped back against the headboard and frantically glanced around the room again as hazy snatches of what he could remember from the night before flickered through his mind and he tried to recap.  
  
'Okay. I had a couple glasses of Vodka. Went back into the room with Tea. We talked some and then-...' His gaze fell again to the form and he winced. 'Oh crap. How could I be so stupid?'  
  
He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and grabbed his pants off of the floor. Putting them on he stood and headed downstairs to go sit on the couch.  
  
Moaning he grabbed his aching head. 'Oh my god. What have I done? How could I have let this happen?'  
  
*********************  
  
Ringalingalingalingalingalingaling!  
  
"Ow..." Tea sat up in bed as the high-pitched noise reached her ears and shot through her head.  
  
Ringalingalingalingalingalingaling!  
  
"I'm coming... I'm coming... Be quiet already." She fumbled with her hand over the edge of the bed and picked up the small black nuisance and put it to her ear. "Hello?"  
  
Ringalingalingalingalingalingaling!  
  
"Ow." Taking it away she opened it and pushed the on button before putting it back to her ear for a second try. "Hello?"  
  
"Tea?! Where's Seto?!" The panicky voice came from the other end and she cringed.  
  
"Not so loud..."  
  
"Oh, sorry. Where's Seto?"  
  
Blinking slowly she slanted her head lazily. "Why would I know where he is?"  
  
"Uh, because this is sort of his phone..."  
  
"Wha?" Taking it away from her ear again she looked at it and then put it back. "Why do I have your brother's phone?"  
  
An exasperated reply came back. "How on earth would I know? ...Hey! Does this mean you and Seto are back together?"  
  
"Um. No. Look Mokuba. If I see you're brother I'll give you a call... Later." Groggily she pushed the button and let the phone fall out of her hand and back onto the floor. Just as she was about to go back to sleep the door opened.  
  
*******************  
  
Seto stepped into the room and walked around it gathering up his items of clothing that were strewn around the floor while silently praying in his head.  
  
'Please don't wake up. Please don't see me. Please don't wake up. Please stay asleep. Please don't-'  
  
"Kaiba?"  
  
'Crap.' Sliding his shirt back over his head he tugged it down and gave her a nervous smile. "Eheh, hey Tea..."  
  
Tea sat up in the bed and pulled the sheet up over her front. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"Um... Picking up my stuff. Don't worry, I'll be gone soon." Grabbing his phone off the floor as well he headed out the door before she could ask him any more questions. As he traveled down the stairs and out the door he ignored the throbbing pain in his temples and dialed for a limo to come pick him up. Sitting down on the grass outside her front door he groaned. 'My head hurts.. I just got drunk. And I just slept with the one person whom I said I would never again have anything to do with. Great, just great. Excellent job Seto. Just peachy.'  
  
*********************  
  
'What in the-? How in the-? Why did he-? Why was he-? Huh?'  
  
Lost and completely confused Tea blinked at the closed door for a few minutes after he had left.  
  
'Kaiba? Was just here. In my room. In my house.' Her eyes fell across the scene of the rumpled up sheets. She in herself not wearing anything, and to top it all off she had absolutely no idea what happened, or how she got home for that matter...  
  
Of course it doesn't take that long to put two and two together. And she got the idea... Which was not a very comforting thing for Tea, The Almighty Angel of Chastity.  
  
'That didn't- We didn't-? No. It didn't happen. I'm just imagining things...' A smile grew onto her face as she got out of bed dragging the sheets around her as she went to her dresser and made herself decent. 'Yeah. That's right. I'm just making things up in my head. That wasn't Seto. It was just some figment of my imagination. Some other guy from a daydream.' She nodded fully convincing herself as she went on with her explanation to make sure it seemed true. Which of course it wasn't... But we all like to develop some sense of self in a situation that we utterly and completely don't want to believe happened. And as long as the story that is made up sounds logical enough, and there are only two people involved making it one word against the other. Who's to doubt you?  
  
'Last night I went to that party. And afterwards I got in a cab and came home. Probably just stumbled upstairs dead tired and ended up here.' The rest she wasn't even going to go into. It didn't exist in her mind, so she didn't care. Giving another nod with a little giggle to match it her face brightened as she went into the bathroom to fix herself up and to get a couple of aspirin so that she wasn't going to drag through the day. 'Yeah. That's it. That's what happened...'  
  
*************************  
  
Back at the Kaiba mansion however, as the limousine pulled up towards the front door and was opened and Seto got out. Things were not being shoved into a little box and ignored so that they seemed to be something else. It had happened, in a very real, and quite disturbing way the young executive to admit.  
  
If he had ever been planning for something of that degree to happen between them in the first place it would have been quite different. Something special... Not some cheap night from Las Vegas that was influenced by nothing more than a few shots of alcohol. He was very upset with himself for letting it happen that way. And very upset that he had given into the nagging temptation to create a convenient excuse for himself to think it meant nothing.  
  
'Childish. Stupid. Completely idiotic. Now what have we learned today? Don't drink. Don't do drugs... And don't go anywhere near your old girlfriend when she's wasted and vulnerable...'  
  
His fist met his own forehead in a frustrated gesture, which he immediately regretted as the pain shot through his head. Wincing he leaned against his own front door which he had managed to drag himself up against.  
  
'I'm such an idiot. I'm such a complete moron. I let this happen against my own will. I let my emotions take over my head and look what happened... Stupid Seto. Just stop thinking about it and remember that you don't need anybody. It's foolish to keep trying to lead myself down a path that is never going to turn out in my favor...'  
  
Twisting the doorknob he pushed inward letting himself inside where he pushed himself onward further to the stairs. Each step he took the throbbing went further through his head as he mentally harassed himself for being such an idiot. Upon reaching the top of the stairwell a small body launched at his legs and latched onto him, almost knocking Kaiba back down the stairs again if he had not managed to grab onto the walls.  
  
"Seto! WhatHappenedToYou? IWasSoWorriedWhenYouDidn'tComeHomeLastNightAndIThoughtSomeReallyReallyReally BadMightHaveHappened! YouDidn'tAnswerYourPhone! AndYouWeren'tAtWork! AndILookedEverywhereAndIHadNoIdeaWhereYouWereAnd-"  
  
Kaiba cut him off when he put his hand over the younger's mouth as the syllables pounded through his head. "Mokuba... Calm down. Everything is fine. There's nothing to worry about. Calm down okay?"  
  
The black head bobbed up and down vigorously so the hand was removed and the flow of words started out again in a much calmer sense. "So what happened? Where were you? Why didn't you call? Why did Tea answer you're phone this morning? Why didn't you leave me a message? Why-"  
  
Seto cut him off again as he unlatched the hands from around his waist and started dragging himself to his room. "I'm asking you to be quiet now. Let's just say you're brother did something that he's not very proud of last night and..." His eyes narrowed and his voice hardened in a threatening tone. "And I swear, if I ever catch you drinking... You're going to be grounded for the rest of your life. Understand?"  
  
Another vigorous nod from Mokuba.  
  
"Good." His eyes softened again. "I'm going to go take a shower now. See you in a bit..." With a slim half smile he opened his room door and disappeared behind it leaving Mokuba to grow a very big smile on his own face.  
  
Unbeknownst to himself the night's last comings had given Kaiba one big emotional boost. Just what the doctor ordered... And just what was making Mokuba grin at this very moment.  
  
Another very well known fact: kids pick up feelings very easily. And Mokuba of course was no exception, especially since that had basically been the only way he's been able to know what's happening with his older brother for his entire life. So just the fact that he knew his brother wasn't sinking into a little hollow was a comforting thought. And it lifted a load off of his shoulders as he skipped down the stairs and turned on his Nintendo to continue on with his insane world of button clicking with a light heart.  
  
((Well. I did it. Now you lovely people have another chapter that has been read ^_^ Hope you liked. And now. I'm going to ask you lovely people for help... Since I'm having writer's block, I need an idea of where Seto should run into Tea. I'm all out of idea's -.- Stupid brain of mine.. ANYWAY! Please give me reviews! Really appreciate it! Later!)) 


	9. A Bad Day

((Thank you for the inspiration people, and I am SO sorry for being so slow in writing. BLAME SCHOOL!!! Eheh, it's all the evil teacher's faults for weighing me down with hours of homework... But I'm gonna try my best to keep going as best I can. So here (finally) is the next chapter for you.))  
  
The next week, or the next Wednesday to be exact. And of course, it was another gorgeous summer day.  
  
Mokuba had managed to drag Seto to the park and he was running around in a sugar high frenzy, playing tag with another group of kids he'd managed to find.  
  
The older Kaiba had resolutely planted himself on a bench nearby and was setting to the task of rereading one of the books from the house for the five millionth time while keeping one watchful eye on his younger brother.  
  
'It's so easy for him to make friends. Even if he'll probably never talk to them again after this one day... He'll still have made them, met them, played with them.' He chuckled as he watched one of the smaller children trip over her own shoelace and get tagged so that she was stuck frozen on the ground. And Mokuba, with a smile on his face and a daring burst of energy rushed over to free her from this position, but as soon as he tagged her, he himself was met with a hand to his back, adhering him to the spot.  
  
'A pointless game with no logic whatsoever... But he enjoys it, so I let him.'  
  
With a shake of the head and a smirk he sent his gaze back to skim over the streaming lines of words that drawled on about this and that. It all sort of went through his head. He already knew it, and the only reason he was reading the book in the first place was so that he looked like he had something to do.  
  
"Tag! You're it!"  
  
Another young boy jumped away as the girl who had fallen earlier was tagged once again. With a smile she headed after him in a pathetic attempt, as she was much slower than he was.  
  
'What were the rules again? If you're tagged you have to stop moving. If someone else tags you again who is not "it" then you can run again. But how many times do you have to get tagged before you become "it"? Was it two? Three...?'  
  
The girl wasn't doing well at all. Almost everyone was just too fast for her to keep up with. Seto's eyes fell over to Mokuba who was taunting her playfully.  
  
"Hey Christa! Betcha can't catch me!"  
  
She scowled at him and made a dash over that he started running away from with a laugh.  
  
Kaiba smiled. 'Look at him. I know he can run much faster than that... He's letting her catch him. On purpose, but not obviously. That way she won't know and neither will the other kids, and there will be no reason for teasing that he likes a girl.' He chuckled at the thought. 'God forbid. What would he do if he liked a girl?'  
  
"I got it! I got it!"  
  
Seto's eyes averted from Mokuba to see a blonde vault over the bench in an attempt to catch a football that was whizzing over it. His foot however caught onto the back and landed him in an uncomfortable position upside down on the wooden piece of furniture, with the caught item in his hands.  
  
"I got it!"  
  
Joey held the football up triumphantly as he clutched onto the back of the bench with his legs so that he didn't fall on his head. Swinging them over sideways he made an undignified roll onto the ground still clutching the ball under his arm as he looked up from his back at Seto who was mildly glaring at him on the bench still with book in hand.  
  
"Oh hey Kaiba." He stood and brushed the dirt off himself before sitting back down normally on the bench. "Whatcha doin?"  
  
'Perfect. Just perfect. Why is it that every time I'm having even what might be remotely resembling a good day, HE has to show up?' "Reading." Shoving his nose back into the text he tried to prevent any further discussion from the blonde next to him, unsuccessfully.  
  
"What about?" Joey leaned over and read the complex title from the back cover and grinned. "Computers? Dude. You SERIOUSLY need a life."  
  
Seto's gaze narrowed as he cast his icy orbs over at him annoyed. "Did I ASK for your opinion?"  
  
He shrugged. "No. I'm just saying..."  
  
"Well just shut up."  
  
"Why? It's true."  
  
'Do you LIVE to torture me? Is that your purpose in life? To make mine miserable?' Kaiba could only give a low growl. He couldn't give an argument since what Joey was saying sort of was true. He did essentially live for his work, and to do anything else was just routine or Mokuba. "Shut up."  
  
This didn't help one bit however as Joey put his hand on Kaiba's shoulder and grinned. "Hey. I'm just being honest."  
  
"I said... Shut up."  
  
"It's not MY fault you don't have a life."  
  
"Are you hard of hearing? I told you to shut up!" Kaiba slammed the book closed and grabbed Joey's hand off of his shoulder to push his thumb into a particular part of the blonde's wrist to cause him a great deal of pain.  
  
"OwOwOw! Okay! Okay! Let go!" Joey tried squirming away but found it quite impossible.  
  
How much Kaiba just wanted to hold his hand right there forever, but his mind couldn't help but wander to Mokuba and so he released the blonde from his grasp and sat leaning back against the back agitated and also a little guilty for almost losing his temper.  
  
'Stupid conscious.' He glared at Joey. "You can leave now."  
  
"Yeah, yeah..." The blonde stood up and tucked the football under his arm as he clutched at his wrist that was still recovering in pain.  
  
Seto closed his eyes and shook his head before standing and started to walk off. "Tell everyone I said hi."  
  
********************  
  
"Joey! Hey Joey. What took you so long?" Tristan jogged over to his friend and stared at him. "Come on. How long does it take to get a ball?"  
  
"Oh. Heh. Yeah. Sorry." Joey tossed the ball over and started heading back to the group of friends. "Kaiba said to say hi."  
  
The brunette followed after him. "Oh, so that's it. Ran into your buddy, huh?"  
  
"Neh, shut it Trist. Let's just play some ball."  
  
********************  
  
"Seto!" Mokuba's head swung in the direction of where the bench was as he turned away from Christa, his new friend. "Seto?"  
  
There wasn't anybody there. Where had he gone? The young Kaiba glanced around for the familiar brown head, but there was nobody.  
  
"Brother?" He blinked a couple of times and then turned to Christa. "Um. I don't know where he went. Be back in a minute."  
  
Detaching his hand from hers he ran off towards the bench and looked around more. 'Where could he be? He was just here a second ago.' Mokuba's eyes fell to the small gang throwing the football back and forth and he ran over and tugged on the bottom of Tea's shirt.  
  
"Tea? Have you seen Seto?"  
  
She stopped and turned to face him. "Why would I know?"  
  
"Because you were with him the other day. So I figured you two were at least talking. So you haven't seen him, huh?"  
  
"No."  
  
Joey butted in as he tossed the ball to Tristan. "I saw him start walking off that way." He pointed and shrugged. "Not sure where he went though."  
  
"Oh, okay." Mokuba's nodded and ran back over to Christa who was patiently waiting for him back in the tag field where everyone had already left. "Hey. Sorry Christa. I can't come over since I can't find Seto. Could I get your phone number? Then we could get together some other time." He smiled and she nodded.  
  
"Okay. Here you go." Pulling a small little scrap of paper out of her pocket she scribbled on it with a small stub of a pencil she had as well and handed it to him. "Here you go. I gotta go now. Talk to you later!" Waving she ran off leaving Mokuba there all by himself.  
  
The younger Kaiba smiled and shoved the slip into his pocket before running back over to Yugi and the gang and he smiled as he latched himself onto Tea's hand.  
  
"Hey guys!"  
  
Tristan stopped in mid throw and looked down at him. "Hey Mokuba. What are you doing here?"  
  
Idly shrugging his shoulders Mokuba smiled. "Oh, just wondering if I could hang out with you guys this afternoon."  
  
Yugi shrugged. "Sure. I don't see why not."  
  
***********************  
  
A few hours later, after going and dwelling inside the deep inner sanctum of the company headquarters, Seto pushed back his chair from one of the many computers in the whirring room and sighed as he looked down at his watch.  
  
"I probably should be getting back. I have to make Mokuba dinner and-"  
  
His eyes grew wide before he closed them again and shook his head. 'I didn't. Oh please tell me I didn't forget him at the park...' Reaching into his pocket he turned it on, since it had been off while he was typing away by his lonesome, and he punched in his home phone. It rang for a couple of times but no one answered and the perky answering machine picked up with Mokuba's voice. "Hi, you've reached the Kaiba residence. We're not home right now, so please leave a message after the tone and we'll get back to you." And the tone sounded, and Seto hung up.  
  
Shoving the phone once again into his pocket he left everything as was in the room. It was too much of a confused jumble for anyone else in the company to make heads or tails of, their minds were too underdeveloped, and they might even end up deleting all the progress he'd made that day accidentally. But that didn't matter right now. He'd been stupid and made a mistake and he needed to find out where Mokuba had gone.  
  
Kaiba ignored the secretary's fluttered reminders to him about this meeting and that program and any other idea that some imbecile had come up on the way to work that morning while eating his daily doughnut. He just went straight past her and pushed out the double doors to break out into a run in the direction of where the park was.  
  
'He's probably still there. I can't believe I did that. How could I be so-'  
  
A black head appeared in the side of his eye as he dashed past the clear door of the ever-so familiar game shop.  
  
Skidding to a halt he took a few steps back and looked through to see Mokuba leaning against the counter happily munching away at some potato chips.  
  
'What?'  
  
Opening the entrance the small bell jingled and Mokuba turned around to face him. The younger Kaiba immediately jumped off of the stool he had been sitting on and gave his older brother a hug. "Hi Seto!" And then he went back to the counter to stuff more chips in his face.  
  
Kaiba took the necessary steps forward to stand next to his brother and tried to see where the general crew of Yugi was. "Hey Mokuba. What are you doing here?"  
  
The small smiled and didn't even bother looking up, as his tone stayed perfectly happy and not even the slightest bit hurt that he was forgotten in the first place. "Yugi gave me a ride so that I didn't have to stay at the park, and Christa's coming over and we're all gonna have a sleepover."  
  
Seto's gaze fell to him. "Were you planning on telling me?"  
  
Mokuba smiled. "I did. Left a message on your voicemail and also at home. I figured you'd get one of the two."  
  
The older couldn't help but get a slight pang of resentment at his little brother's smug tone. Was Mokuba mocking him? He knew he had been in the wrong on this one, but that didn't give him an exact right to be making fun of him for being slightly absent minded for once in his life.  
  
There was a shrug another chip went into the mouth. "I mean, of course it's fine. Nothing bad happened to me and I didn't want to bother you in your work, since I figured that's where you'd gone. If I screwed up your concentration you might mess up or something. Since you're so easily distracted and all."  
  
Seto clenched his fist tightly and his icy orbs glared at Mokuba. 'Don't you dare. Don't you DARE make fun of me.'  
  
Mokuba felt his brother tensing and jumped down from the stool with the bowl of chips in his arms and he started walking off from behind the house. "I'll see you tomorrow. Yugi's gonna give me a ride over so you don't have to worry about picking me up. I'm sure you're busy anyway. And I don't want to make you forget what you were doing before you noticed I was gone any more than I have to." A fiendish grin crossed his face. "Don't forget to finish those programs you were working on. You don't want to get distracted by us children."  
  
As Mokuba disappeared behind the door Kaiba's body began to shake in hot anger. 'Traitor.. You traitor. You bloody little traitor. You did this to me? You killed me, and now you make fun of me? You're just like Mom and Dad. You're just like Him.' His jaw worked to crush his teeth together as he tersely turned on his heals and jammed the door open. 'Of all the people.. Of anyone to do this to me.. It was yours Mokuba- yours that hurt the most. I've stuck up for you and protected you for all these years, and then just because I forgot you one day out of the countless others you go and turn on me. You filthy bagworm. You miniscule little piece of slime! How dare you cross me like that. How dare you! How DARE you!'  
  
Turning the corner of the block lost in his own boiling inferno he didn't notice as he ran smack dab into somebody. And of all somebodys, it was the one to make his day even better than it had been after progressing from Joey's first interjection... Tea.  
  
((MWAHAHAHAAAA!!! (Yes I'm sugar high) MWAHAHAHAAA!! I AM EVIL!!! ^_^ Don't you all just love me? Leaving you off there. And don't worry.. If any of you are at all confused right now then it will get further explained during the next chapter.. if I can ever get that one out O.o Anyway. Review more now ^^ )) 


	10. Running

"Oof!" Tea fell backwards to sit down hard on the concrete sidewalk. Rubbing at her head, which was the part of her body that had banged with the oncoming person, she mumbled agitated. "Hey, watch where you're going."  
  
When there wasn't any answer she looked up to see none other than Kaiba on the ground in front of her, since he had been knocked down as well. Sitting with his legs crossed and resting his elbows on his knees while he meshed his fingers in his hair and was staring at the sidewalk.  
  
'I hate my life. I hate today. First Joey, then Mokuba, now Tea... Does somebody up there hate me? ... Well fine. Fine! If they're gonna play their sick little twisted games up there and screw with my head then I'm going to screw with theirs. They want to take away all that's close to me and turn it against me and abandon me? Well let's see them try!'  
  
The next thing that happened took Tea completely off guard, as she found something unexpected pressing to her face.  
  
********************  
  
'What in the-? How in the-? What the heck?!' Smack!  
  
Tea's hand rather abruptly came to meet with Kaiba's cheek and she shoved him away.  
  
"What do you think you're doing you jerk?!"  
  
And Seto smiled. A very slim smile that barely appeared on his face before he folded his arms and closed his eyes in a recluse manner before giving her a low and toneless response.  
  
"Bitch..."  
  
"Bitch?! Bitch?!?!?!!" Tea jumped up off the ground in a fury. "You have the gall to knock me down, KISS me! And then you call me a bitch?!?!?!?!!!!"  
  
"... Yes." His eyes met with hers in the same flat way as his voice. He was pissed, really pissed, and what had started off as a good day had taken a rapid turn in the exact opposite direction and now? ... Now he wanted a fight, something that he could control and manipulate in his favor unlike the mess that seemed to be the rest of his life.  
  
"What do you mean 'Yes'?!" In any other situation Tea would not have thrown herself into hysterics quite so easily. But this was different, this was Kaiba. The exact person who had felt like up and dumping her over the phone with no good reason she could see, and then now all of a sudden kissed her? And then, to top it all off, he was insulting her right after the fact. 'What's his PROBLEM?'  
  
As the smile still remained across his features he stood as well and faced her. "I mean 'yes' by the fact that I am in fact calling you a bitch. You didn't seem to be sure, I should have figured as much... You're mind must be too small to comprehend such vocabulary..."  
  
This was too much and her eyes narrowed and she shook her head from side to side steaming. "That was low... That was just low..."  
  
And now just for the plain sake of making things worse, Kaiba moved onto the level of mocking. "Oh? Was that low? Is it possible that I hurt your oh so delicate feelings?" His face went flat and menacing. "Well I'm sorry. Maybe you'd feel like getting drunk again and going to sleep with some other poor bastard."  
  
"What?" Tea's face was lost. 'What's he talking about?'  
  
This only met her with more expressionless staring. "You're not telling me that you're possibly that stupid to think that it never happened? It was you in the first place who started getting all... all... THAT way!" From the brief moments he had been able to claw up from his, then intoxicated, brain, he could tell that she was in fact the one who made the first move in the physical sense. But of course he had mentioned to her that he was her 'boyfriend' in order to get her away from those others guys... But for now he was going to ignore all wrongdoings on his part. If she really didn't believe it happened then she wouldn't possibly be able to recall anything that he'd done, and if she tried then she couldn't deny that it happened any more... Either way he was safe.  
  
'That way, that way.. by 'that way' does he mean THAT way? But.. but that was just a daydream...' For the brief moment her pupils shrank in horror. 'Oh my god.'  
  
Her hand snapped up again to slap him across the face, hard.  
  
Completely unintentionally however she had managed to put her nails into her slap and therefore after her hand was away, she had left him five crimson gashes across his cheek. And seeing this her hands went up to her mouth in shock.  
  
"Oh my god... I'm sorry."  
  
***********************  
  
'Yes my little my little princess, you are sorry, aren't you?' His icy orbs pierced through her soul as he ignored the burning sensation that cut across his flesh. 'You're sorry for causing me such pain and turmoil when all of it really is MY fault and none of it yours. You're sorry that I let you go, cast you free, let you spread your wings and take flight and all you wanted to do was perch on my finger for the rest of eternity. And afterwards all you had left to do was hover around my head while I tried to keep you away but have secretly wanted to let you back in for the entire time... Well I'm just going to tell you right now and in full that I hate you. I hate you for being so beautiful, for being so kind, for being so caring, for being so absolutely perfect and constantly trying to brush me with your angelic divinity.'  
  
And at that very moment he couldn't help but shed a single tear from his inner pains.  
  
'Why am I so weak when I'm left alone to myself? Why do I have to resort to violence, or crying, or hurting those that I care for in my own sick way of trying to heal myself? Why?' He didn't know, wasn't going to know, and even if he could of... he didn't want to know.  
  
His orbs were still cast into hers however, and as he tried to hide the conflict of himself the though dawned on him that it wasn't working... at all. So as he was sitting there thinking she was picking up his emotional fragments... And he didn't want that.  
  
"Goodbye, Tea."  
  
Seto turned away and went in the opposite direction as he ignored his cheek and it felt like instead, his eyes were bleeding. The tears that were welling there swelled to cut his vision as he continued stumbling forward blindly in what he was assuming was the direction of his house... Since at this point the tears were far too many for him to see anything except blurry forms.  
  
One crystalline droplet crept out which he immediately brought his arm up to wipe away. When he brought it back down however he noticed to blood from his face and stared as more salty daggers poured across his skin to mix with the other crimson liquid before the backs of his arms went up again to try to bury them.  
  
'Go away. Leave me alone. I don't want to cry...'  
  
His feet kept their constant forward pattern as they dragged him forward until he made out a chain link fence that he'd have to avoid through his tearstained vision. Over which of course was a place which Seto had only been to once before in his life, since Mokuba wasn't a big fan of playgrounds.  
  
*********************  
  
A twelve-year-old sat in his room shoving various items of clothing and other odds and ends into a backpack. Today... he was leaving today. It didn't matter that the time was only three o'clock in the morning. What other time could he leave? This was when he was safe, when nobody was awake and nobody could catch him.  
  
As he shoved the last thing into the bag he zipped it up and slid it on before going over to his desk where he glared at the accursed programs that were floating over his desktop.  
  
"Stupid things..." He shut off the system and looked around the dark room one last time before he crept out the door and closed it as silently as he possibly could.  
  
Creeping down the hall a short distance he opened another door and slid through to shut it and banish the room into darkness.  
  
"Mokuba?" Seto made his way over to his little brother's bed and shook the sleeping form gently. "Mokuba, wake up."  
  
"Mm-hm, what?" The sleepy figure rubbed at his eyes as he sat up and blinked a couple times in the black room. "What is it big brother?"  
  
Kaiba uncovered him and pulled him to his feet to go over to the younger's dresser to get him some clothes as he explained things as little as possible. "We're taking off for a little while. Now as we're leaving I want you to be a very good boy and keep quiet, understand?" He placed the clothes in his brother's arms and then started pacing around the room impatiently. Seto wanted to leave NOW.  
  
Mokuba nodded and changed into the clothes before walking over to his agitated older sibling. "Where are we going?"  
  
The icy orbs cast over him and then ran around the room in a last check to make sure he had everything he could possibly need. "We're going out. That's all you need to know." Before Mokuba could ask any more questions he grabbed the younger's hand and dragged him out of the room and into the moonlit hallway.  
  
Seto checked underneath all the room doors from a distance. 'No lights. Good.' Then he quickly ran down the stairs still with Mokuba in tow, but before they emerged out of the stairwell he stopped against the wall and peered out. 'Nobody.' Dragging the small one behind him he made a quiet rush to the door which as soon as he reached it he slowed down. This door would be loud, not like the indoor ports that weren't sealed from the outside weather.  
  
Turning back he kneeled down to stare at Mokuba hard. "Brother, as soon as we're out that door I want you to run with me. Don't make any noise; I just want you to run. I'll explain all of this to you later, but right now I want you to listen to me and just do as I say. Okay?"  
  
There was a nod to answer him, and that was all he needed. Reaching over to the door he turned the knob slowly and pulled the door open even more slowly as the creaking of the hinges made themselves very audible in the echo of the mansion. He cringed but slid out of the small crack all the same with Mokuba behind him and closed the door in the same slow painstaking manner.  
  
Turning from the wooden object he faced the large lawn before him and gave his little brother's hand one tight squeeze. 'One... Two... Three...' "Go!"  
  
And he took off in a headlong run dragging the little one behind him. He inwardly wished that Mokuba could run faster, but there wasn't anything he could do about it now... And for the moment it seemed safe. There hadn't been any alarms that had gone off, no unexpected lights turning on, it had all just remained in the same still sleep of the night.  
  
Seto kept them running ragged until they were out of the grounds and a good ways away from the gates. As soon as he thought it safe he stopped and hid behind a tree by the edge of the road with Mokuba by him and he panted trying to catch his breath.  
  
There was a curious glance that came from the little one up at his older brother's abnormal behavior. He tried to keep his small lungs full of air but was jittering to run again at any notice. The paranoia of his sibling was making him panic himself, but he didn't want to say anything for fear of making any false noise.  
  
Kaiba noticed this and tried to calm down slightly. "It's all right Mokuba. We don't have to run anymore. We can walk." Grabbing onto the small hand he took of at a gentle pace but kept glancing over his shoulder. "Yeah, it's fine."  
  
After a few minutes Seto stopped walking all together since they'd reached where he wanted, at a bench with the desired sign reading: Bus Stop.  
  
Mokuba's eyes looked up at the sign and then to his brother. "Seto, where are we going?"  
  
The older shook his head. "We're just going to the park. It's not big deal. Don't worry Mokuba, I'll take care of you."  
  
This was a reassuring thought and the little black head bobbed up and down and was completely content when the actual bus pulled up and Seto dragged him on.  
  
The older Kaiba reached into his pocket to pay for the bus fee and counted the spare change. 'What?' His eyes spread wide as he counted the two nickels, three times, and four pennies in his hand. 'I swear I had more than this.'  
  
Seto held up his finger to the impatient bus driver and took his backpack off to dig though it. 'I know I had more than that. Where is it? Where'd that other money go?'  
  
"What are you looking for brother?" The small innocent gaze of Mokuba looked over him.  
  
"I'm looking for change. I only need six cents. I swear I had that money..." His hands continued digging through all the spare blankets and cans of food he'd rummaged together inside his bag.  
  
"Oh forget it kid. Just give me what you got and take your seat..."  
  
This was not met with a relieved 'thank you' however, but rather a defiant glare. "I HAVE the money. Just give me a minute..." There was a small clinking sound and he pulled out the desired nickel and penny which he pushed into the change slot and then yanked Mokuba down to the back of the bus.  
  
He didn't need anybody to give him a break on and he wasn't going to let anybody treat him easy just because he was young.  
  
Both he and Mokuba sat down in the far left corner and the younger rubbed at his eyes and yawned. It was still only quarter after three in the morning. Any decent human being would be asleep at this time of day. Seto needed Mokuba to stay awake though, at least for now, until they got to the park and he could find a safe place for them to hide for the remainder of the night.  
  
It didn't take the bus that long to reach the park and the two Kaiba brothers got off of it with the older leading the way.  
  
Seto led him to the small one behind him and climbed up the metal ladder of the jungle gym before him. Crawling across the wooden platform he waited until Mokuba came up before he ushered his little brother into a small tunnel between another platform.  
  
After that he crawled after him to sit next to Mokuba and he dug into his backpack to pull out a blanket that he'd brought along with him and he wrapped it around the younger's shoulders. Lying down himself he closed his eyes with a wave of relaxation washing over him as Mokuba lay down as well and he put his arm protectively over his little sibling. Right now, he was safe, and right now, no one could get him... He had nothing more to worry about, no more stupid programs, no more dictator crashing down on him to abuse his intellect and physical being. Life was good.  
  
And with that thought drifting through his mind he fell into a relaxed slumber, the most relaxed slumber he'd had in the last couple years of his life. And the last one he'd have for a while...  
  
((And that's another chapter for you ^^! It ended in the middle of a flashback, there's more coming for you ::evil laugh and rubs hands together:: You'll see... You'll see... Anyway! Keep up with the happy reviews! Later!)) 


	11. Coming Back

The next morning, as the to-be executive's lids lifted to greet the morning sun he noticed the small being was no longer underneath his arm and jolted upright to result in hitting his head on the roof of the tunnel and cursed under his breath.  
  
"Mokuba?" The concern in his voice was audible as he stuck his head out of the opening to see the very figure of choice on the ground with his hand clamped firmly in a much larger one.  
  
"Seto! Lookie who came to take us home!" With the blissful smile across his face, and him being only the naïve age of six, he was completely unaware of his older brother's predicament with the very man of whom which he was holding onto firmly. Gozaburo of course had no fight with Mokuba, and as such the only view the small one had was that he was the father he never had, or never remembered.  
  
Upon seeing the firm face Seto quickly retracted back inside the tunnel as his chest started to heave and fall rapidly. 'Oh god, oh god, oh holy god with shit and crap. Why? Why me? I thought I'd finally gotten away...' He scooted further backwards and took the blanket that was still spread out and shoved it back into his backpack. 'I'll just go out the other side. Run away, make a break for it, and he'll never be able to catch me.'  
  
But then he stopped, and another string of curses came to his lips. 'But what about Mokuba?'  
  
Pulling his backpack on he scooted forward again to pierce his gaze between the distance of him and Gozaburo. "What do you want?"  
  
Mokuba cocked his head and blinked a couple of times as he noticed his brother tensed, and rather, well, angry. "Seto, I told you, he's come to take us home..."  
  
This didn't grant him with the gaze of his older sibling however, but more just a terse order on the side. "Mokuba, I didn't ask you, I asked him. Shut up." 'Don't make this any worse for me...'  
  
Gozaburo gave a rather smug smile. "Come down here my boy. Mokuba's right, I'm just here to take you back home. To where you belong."  
  
'Bastard...' "Don't tell me where I belong!" He clenched his fists and despite how strong he was feeling, his body began to shake. Whether it was through his anger, or from his just plain fear of the man was a mystery... After all, this was his first attempt, his first defiant act. He had no idea what he was doing and there was absolutely no solid ground to stand on, especially with Mokuba already in his adversary's possession.  
  
"Oh come on now. I'm just here to take you home. Don't you want to go home? With your nice warm bed, some food... I'm sure you must be hungry. Wouldn't you like some scrambled eggs and bacon for your growling stomach? Now be a good boy and come down here. You know you want to..."  
  
Seto couldn't help but cringe. It was a tempting picture that was being painted inside of his head, but it wasn't what he was going to really get... Sure, he got to eat, but not in the homely way that this was being expressed. It was more of a tense situation with him silently placing the food inside his mouth and mechanically chewing as Gozaburo waited impatiently in the corner with his arms folded. Waiting for him to finish, so that he could give the next assignment, or look over the one that he's given two minutes ago that wasn't finished. After which generally... there came a beating.  
  
And the whole concept of a comfy warm bed was unimaginable. Sleep? That was a concept that Seto didn't understand. 'Sweet dreams' was not a phrase that entered his vocabulary. The brief moments of respite that he received always resulted over his keyboard in the ungodly hours of the morning, after which came more beatings.  
  
"All right... I'm coming." Reluctantly, and fully expectant of yet another beating coming his way as soon as Gozaburo had him alone at home, Seto made his way down from the play equipment and walked stiffly over to his adoptive parent with a hollow expression and half closed eyes. 'I'm doing this for you, Mokuba. I told you that I'd take care of you and that's just what I'm going to do... Even if it kills me...'  
  
**************************  
  
Kaiba snorted. "Yeah, and a lot of good that did me..." Walking around the metal fence he sat down in one of the swings and let his legs rest calmly against the ground beneath him as he rested his head against the chain.  
  
Okay, so maybe there was a slight possibility that Seto wasn't really mad at Mokuba. Just the simple knowledge of how many times the little one's mere spirit of being had kept him from killing himself during that whole ordeal.  
  
"But what do I owe him? That would have only made us even on favors, not tipped the scales. This last act would make it crossed, so he owes me, not the other way around... But then why-.. Why do I feel so guilty?"  
  
The auburn bangs came to shadow his eyes as he hung his head. "Yeah, I know... I've pledged myself to him and now, because he did one thing wrong, I'm turning back on that, and giving up." His chest rose and fell as a sigh escaped his lips. "Alright then, I'll apologize tomorrow, when he gets back home."  
  
Resting his cheeks in his palms a sharp reminder was made from his right cheek and he pulled his hands away quickly to stare at the crimson liquid that had appeared.  
  
"Oh... I'd forgotten about that." Bringing his right hand up gently he brushed across his face and closed his eyes. 'Tea... another person in whom I'm indebted to for life. She's saved mine, quite a few times actually, and now she's here to remind me again.. That life is pain, and all of us suffer.'  
  
He stood and rubbed at his eyes to hide where his former tears had been and started heading back in the direction of the game shop.  
  
'I've hurt her, and I can't live with myself knowing that I've left that. I can barely live with myself right now... In fact I don't want to live with myself right now, I'd rather die with myself right now. Maybe I should.. But we'll hold off our suicidal desires until later, and we're home alone.. all alone. God I wish I had that belt...'  
  
Of course the belt he was referring to was from his most recent reminiscing back into the corridors of his mind, the belt in which he'd come quite accustomed to. The thick black leather that had come to meet with his raw flesh almost every night of his young adolescents. And his wishing for the object was from his inner wishing for controllable pain instead of the fiery roller coaster that he was going to crash in hell one day.  
  
This twisted sense of vision was almost sickening to his stomach as he kept going forward until he came to the game shop door. The time had changed quite dramatically since he'd been there in what seemed like a few moments ago.. In his space out the sun had however, had plenty of time to set, and had been in that state of fashion for a good couple of hours.  
  
Without bothering to knock on the door he opened it and the small bell jingled. Yugi's grandfather, at the time, was in the back room and therefore had no idea that Kaiba had entered... he was grateful.  
  
Seto walked through the doorway in the back that lead into Yugi's living room, where in fact the very boy was with his friends and setting up sleeping bags. Nobody had noticed his entrance, and his gaze first locked onto Mokuba who was in the corner quite happily chattering away with Christa.  
  
Kaiba didn't have the heart nor the patience to deal with him right now, instead he let his eyes wander to Tea who was unrolling her sleeping bag. At this very point in time the young executive thought it would be in his best interest to announce his presence.  
  
"Tea, could I please talk to you for a minute?"  
  
At this point six pairs of eyes snapped up and silently locked to him.  
  
Closing his eyes Seto folded his arms and sighed as he flatly repeated the request once more. "I need to speak to Tea for a moment, could she please come outside..."  
  
With a frozen crank working it's way inside her brain Tea left off of her sleeping bag and stared at him. "Um, ... Why?"  
  
'I don't have time for this.. I just want to go home. Alright then, fine. Let them all laugh at me as I humble myself, I don't give a shit.' Lifting his lids, icy crystals formed their way inside his heart, preparing for the oncoming onslaught. "Tea, I came to apologize for insulting you earlier. I had no right to do that. And I'm sorry." Turning to the side with his hand placed on the edge of the doorway he gazed off at the floor. "As for the rest of you I apologize for my intrusion... And Mokuba..." His inner soul quivered and he closed his eyes in pain as his voice dropped to a low whisper. "I'm sorry that I wasn't a good enough brother for you..."  
  
Without bothering to find their reactions, and without waiting to think the emotions over that were playing with his head he left the doorway, and the soft jingling of the bell in the doorway was heard a few moments later.  
  
******************  
  
Home, the very destination in which Seto had reached at this very point in time. He ignored locking the door, he ignored fixing dinner, he ignored the work he'd neglected to finish on his desktop, and most of all... he ignored his better judgment.  
  
Walking into the bathroom upstairs he turned on the water, and cranked the knob all the way to the left side until it wouldn't go any further. Hot, he wanted hot, very hot.  
  
As he stuck his hand underneath the faucet and immediately recoiled his arm back as the sting touched his fingertips and he smiled. 'Good.'  
  
Taking off his shoes and socks he stepped into the shower and loved as he felt the burning liquid pour over his person and soak through his clothing.  
  
'Now this I can deal with. This I'm used to. Holy crap it hurts, but at least I can handle this.'  
  
Of course it didn't take long for the heat to reach and unbearable degree, and Kaiba knew, even if he didn't want to, that he'd have to remove himself from the shower. So stepping out he watched the steam rising off of his self and let a slim smile trace his lips as his head spun.  
  
'It's not permanent damage, just a one time thing... everybody needs a nice warm shower everyone once in a while right? Oh, who cares, this is good.'  
  
Walking out of the bathroom he left his shoes in there and his cloths stuck to him, keeping the burning feeling coursing through every vein in his body and his breathing started growing to a rapider pace as his body tried to cool itself down and react to the extremity of the temperature it was being forced to put up with.  
  
He cursed at himself for not having a stronger person, even though all considering, any other body that had been put through what he'd done to himself would have been no longer functional at this point. But Seto ignored that and just wished that he wasn't so weak, since that was what he thought himself, and he made his way down the hall to his room and collapsed down on his bed as colors skipped past his vision.  
  
Closing his eyes he tried to calm his breath but found it rather impossible as he was forced to clench down his jaw to avoid the urge to scream out in pain. So maybe he was going to wake up in the morning with third degree burns, but for now he was happy to dwell in his own little time warp back to childhood.  
  
Kaiba was peaceful this way, he didn't mind. This was what he'd become accustomed to for almost half of his life. Little did Gozaburo know that his abusive tendencies towards his trainee might actually end up causing the downfall of his company's greatest asset rather than the expansion of a wonderful new empire.  
  
Seto took his fist and placed it in his mouth to bite down on the knuckle trying to staunch the flow of tears from his eyes. 'Holy shit this hurts...' Taking a few more rapid breaths he pulled underneath the covers of his bed and hid underneath the fabric as light was taken from his view.  
  
His body began shaking and despite all else he felt sleepy, worn out. Taking his hand from his teeth he then yanked the blankets closer to himself and continued shivering despite how the burning of his skin was eating away at his insides.  
  
As such, so did the same feeling start taking over his mind and soul, burning, reeling, careening through a tumbling chaos, and in such moments of turmoil it's only natural to seek points of reference, close things that are endearing to us, and so was the very same as Seto began humming to himself softly as he shivered underneath his covers and his skin crawled.  
  
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are gray.. You'll never know dear, how much I love you.. Oh please don't take, my sunshine away..."  
  
This was one frail thread of peace he'd been able to maintain, and as he repeated it over and over again, humming ever so softly with the notes alluring himself into sleep, the pain didn't seem so bad, and his bleeding insides fell back into the recesses of his mind, and his breathing slowed as his muscles released all their tension and he took one last long breath before sleep overtook him entirely.  
  
*******************  
  
"Merry Christmas Mokuba..." Seto's soft whisper barely reached his own ears as he listened to the sounds below from the top of the stairwell. Work? Of course he had work to be doing, but for goodness sake, it was Christmas!  
  
"And I know exactly what my present it going to be too..." He rolled up his sleeves and stared at the red marks that lined his arms from the night before, so maybe it wasn't such a bad holiday. At least he got a break, even if it was a self-appointed one that was later going to be punished.  
  
With a heavy sigh he stood up and dry-eyed walked into his little brother's room to place a very small item on the pillow. It had a crumpled brown wrapping paper, something Seto had managed to smuggle from downstairs, and there was a small piece of paper that served as a card.  
  
Seto didn't know how he'd been able to do it every year, but Mokuba always got a present from him. He knew Mokuba always got him one as well, but he never got it. The lines he always heard from the stairwell were always the same, year after year, holiday after holiday. 'Where's my brother?' 'He's not feeling well.' 'Can I give him his gift?' 'Oh don't be silly; I don't want you getting sick. Here, let me give it to him for you...'  
  
And so it went, and so it would stay.  
  
Taking his leave from the room, Seto went back to the stairwell and listened for a brief moment in order to hear it starting.  
  
"What happened to Seto? Isn't he going to open presents with us?"  
  
"Oh I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you. He's not feeling at his best today, he has to stay in bed."  
  
Then leaving from that he went into his room and stared at his computer screen from a few feet away. How many was he supposed to write today? Fifty was it? Oh well, not like it mattered. Fifty programs, fifty belts, he was used to it.  
  
Making his way over to his bed he sat down on the edge and picked up a piece of toast that had been placed on his bedside table. Putting the food mechanically in his mouth he chewed on the cardboard. These were the only days that he got to eat in peace, and even then it wasn't peace, because he knew what would come later that night, or the next morning.. early.  
  
Sighing dejectedly he walked back to his desk and swallowed his toast before placing his hands on the keys and setting to starting the day's assignment. Maybe if he found some magical way to finish them before lunch he wouldn't get beaten that day... maybe.  
  
As that very hour approached he heard the joyful merriment enter a brief recess, and he knew what was coming next. Soon enough the knock on the door sounded, and he only needed to wait a second before there was the man of his torture standing in his doorway.  
  
"Well, well, well... It looks like my little bagworm decided to work today. How good of him."  
  
It was mocking. Seto heard it. Seto loathed it. He clenched his fists but held his tongue, seven long years had taught him that trick.  
  
He heard the steps measure leveling behind him and then felt the constricting grip set itself to his shoulder.  
  
"Only six? Six programs for a whole days work? My, my, what are we going to do with you? How about this, my boy... If you can answer this question I'll let you off the hook. Tell me, what is six times seven?"  
  
"Forty-two, sir." Setting his gaze of to the side he knew what was coming.  
  
This only caused Gozaburo to grin. "And does that sound like a good number to you?"  
  
"Yes, sir. It does sound like a good number considering it is the correct one."  
  
"Oh really then." The man spun Seto's chair around and grabbed both of his shoulders harshly and had a grin full of malice plastered over his features. "So I guess you don't want to be let off after all... Well if that's what you really want, I don't have any objection to it." Stepping back from the smaller the man took off his belt and coiled it in his fist as he glared down at the fourteen-year-old. "And since you like the number forty-two so much.. why not that many? With a few more, just for good luck..."  
  
Seto stood up and walked to the middle of the room bracing himself for his punishment, as he remained dry-eyed. There would be no crying, he would not show his tears to this man... No matter what his answer to the question had been he would have been beaten. It was rigged. If he said no; then he would have been wrong, because he would have been contradicting his own answer. He'd tried maybe, maybe didn't work. That only gave him more, for not being able to make up his mind. And yes...? Well yes brought him to this very spot. Standing there, and just waiting for it to come. If he tensed his body noticeably enough to have a firm resistance against the hardened leather, then Gozaburo would just wait until his muscles would force him to relax. And if he started out too soft, then it would hurt more than it had to.  
  
So in his learning's, what Seto had managed to learn from life in these passing years, he stayed the exact way he was from the moment he got out of his chair, to the moment he stood in the middle of the room. He knew that it was going to hurt, and more for the fact that Gozaburo had a way of timing it so, just as he was being lulled into a false sense of security, and it had been long enough to get the idea in a head that maybe the beatings weren't coming after all... That was when the man would strike.  
  
And so he waited, trying to dig through his mind to thoughts of Mokuba, reasons why he didn't grab the belt as it was swung and turn on the man with the metal of the object. One good hit in the temple and then his troubles would be all over. But what would that prove for his younger sibling? ... That he was just like the man. That he was a ruthless killer. And as such Mokuba would be afraid, and be in the same position as Seto was now. Since at the moment Mokuba had no idea what Gozaburo was really like, he didn't know the inner workings of the man's mind like the young Kaiba did. So this would be his first exposure to the whole ordeal, and therefore would give him cause to be afraid of his brother... Something unbearable.  
  
And as his thoughts were thus running off, so came the first blow.  
  
Grunting in pain he grimaced, but soon let his muscles untense again... If he didn't then it would just take longer before this was all over with. But before he could find his happy medium again so can the second blow, and the third. Being forced to fall forward on all fours he grasped his trembling hands at the rug as more strikes fell to his person.  
  
'Five, six, seven...' Seto found it almost calming to count them as he figured what fraction of the total he had reached. 'Eleven, twelve, thirteen...'  
  
His help to himself failed however as a sharp blow came to the back of his head and it jostled the colors before him. 'Eleventy, Twenty-ten...'  
  
"Now how many would that be? Hmm..." The playful manner of the tone was sickening. "My dear boy, do you know what number that was?"  
  
"Th-thirty-two sir." Seto had no idea, but he had to at least guess.  
  
"Oh, wait, Now I remember!" And a hard crashing blow met with the young one's spine. Causing him to fall completely to the ground.  
  
As that happened Gozaburo leaned down next to his ear and whispered gently to him. "Don't cross me boy. I know how you work. I own you, you belong here. Take my advice, and don't try to fight it. Maybe one day you'll even be worthy of these pitiful holidays, but don't jump ahead of yourself." Standing up he put his foot down on Seto's back and gave it a small push. "Nobody's going to come help you, so don't even try escaping your destiny."  
  
With that the older removed his foot, and took himself out of the room.  
  
Seto barely managed to hold his tears. 'Mokuba. Mokuba, where are you?'  
  
Shakily pushing himself up into a sitting position, he crawled over to his desk and climb up onto the chair before taking out the necklace from his neck and staring at the childish form of his baby brother. 'Alright... Yeah, okay... Merry Christmas Mokuba, it's more than I'll ever have...' And his fingers went to buttons, and the buttons were pushed, and the programs grew while the hope flickered as a little candle inside the young one's heart.  
  
*******************  
  
Later that night, much later that night, so much later that night that no humanly person would even THINK of being awake... Seto turned off his computer and snatched out the disk, before grabbing the stack of papers that he'd printed out.  
  
He'd done the programs, all fifty, and by hell Gozaburo was going to look at them.  
  
After the exit of his room he made his way down the hall to the end where his "father's" office was. Knocking on the door softly he spoke out.  
  
"Sir, may I please come in?"  
  
There was no reply from the inside for a few seconds and then...  
  
"Yes, come on."  
  
Twisting the handle Seto shyly slipped through the doorway and stood with the papers grasped shakily in his hands as he cast his gaze to the back of the big office chair, like in one of those classic mophia movies with "the boss", and he approached the desk.  
  
"Sir, I finished those programs that you wanted for today. And I was hoping that you might want to look over them, that is, if it's not too late already."  
  
Student to teacher, teacher to student.  
  
"Well boy, we'll just have to take a look see." Spinning his chair around he took the papers that Seto presented to him and then started flipping through the pages. After a couple of minutes the man stood up and walked to stand in front of Seto with a smirk.  
  
The next thing that he did however, was the most jarring thing that would ever happen in the young one's life... He hugged him.  
  
Seto felt the strong arms around his person and almost felt like crying. "Ex-excuse me sir?"  
  
As for the crying, Gozaburo was already a lost cause and he pulled away with a proud smile beaming off his face. "My boy, my boy, my boy... What a fine young man you're growing into."  
  
"Sir?" Lost, completely lost, Seto didn't have the faintest idea what on earth was going on.  
  
"Seto! These are brilliant!" Holding up the stack of papers he continued grinning. "This is the best I've seen out of you yet. Good job, Seto. Fabulous work."  
  
'He's- he's congratulating me?' "But sir, I don't think I-"  
  
"No, nonsense. You deserve a reward. How about this... We'll go downstairs and you can pick anything that you want to do, anything at all. How does that sound?"  
  
'It sounds like heaven, but I can't believe it's a reality.' "Do you really mean that sir?"  
  
Rumpling Seto's hair he grinned. "Of course I do. Now come on, it's late, we don't want to wait too long." Grabbing the younger's hand firmly he took him out of the room and down the stairs so that they were standing in the living room.  
  
Seto's eyes grew as he stared around the place, taking into consideration that he hadn't seen a Christmas ever since the orphanage, this was unbelievable.  
  
A towering Christmas tree had been placed in the middle of the room, while a few toy trains played around it. There were also a few still set ups with small figurines doing other such acts of merriment, skating, sledding, taking a carriage ride...  
  
Walking forward in a sereal dream, Seto walked over to the tree and looked underneath it was it was completely empty, turning around he faced the man. "Sir, could I please have my present?"  
  
Gozaburo cocked an eyebrow. "And what present would that be exactly?"  
  
"My present from Mokuba."  
  
"Oh." The man went silent for a few second as he stared apologetically at the floor. "I'm afraid he didn't get you one this year Seto."  
  
"What?" A bleeding arrow lanced through his heart, shattering all the bliss that surrounded him. "But I heard you, and him, he always... He couldn't have possibly forgotten..."  
  
"But he did Seto, he did."  
  
Earlier his own name coming from his father's lips had been pleasing, but now... Now it only hurt more. "Don't lie to me!"  
  
Gozaburo remained just as level however, "Seto, I'm not lying to you. He didn't get you a gift this year."  
  
"You- you have to be... He'd never- He's my BROTHER!" Clenching his fist he then sent a hard glare over at his father. "This, this is YOUR fault!"  
  
"Seto, son, don't be irrational. How could this possibly be my fault?"  
  
Too much, it was just too much. Had this all just been an act? The kindness? The congratulations? Had it all just been some ploy to make him drop his defenses so that he could have a dagger stabbed through his heart where he was most vulnerable? He didn't know, he didn't care, all he wanted now... Was that man dead.  
  
"Die you rotting bastard!!!"  
  
Loosing all sense of reality he had, Seto launched himself at his tormenter's throat. Gripping his hands around the trachea he shook as hard as he could.  
  
"DIE! DIE!! DIE!!!"  
  
He soon however felt the much stronger arms grabbing his wrists and pulling them off and him up off the floor so that his feet were dangling.  
  
This didn't stop his fury at all though, even if he was out muscled, outsmarted, and maybe out everything... He was going to bloody well kill this man before the night was out.  
  
Giving his legs a fierce kick, one met with a knee, while the other met with a MUCH more sensitive area.  
  
The grip loosened on his wrists at the moment just enough for him to get free, drop back to the ground, and shove his adoptive father to the ground. Which was soon followed after with him jumping on top of the man and pummeling his face with his fists.  
  
Taking into account that Seto wasn't his full size yet, but a fourteen-year- old is far big enough to be able to cause some SERIOUS damage when they have murder on their minds.  
  
"Die!" Punch. "You!" Punch. "Fucking!" Punch. "Bastard!" And as the next punch would have come Seto suddenly felt his arm held back and a pleading cry.  
  
"Big brother! Stop!"  
  
Seto tried to release his arm, but his younger sibling wouldn't let go.  
  
"No!"  
  
This only caused Mokuba to break out into tears and latch onto Seto's arm even tighter. "Brother, please! Don't hurt Papa anymore!"  
  
Fiery gaze turned from Gozaburo and then onto Mokuba where it extinguished. Stepping up off of the man, who was at the point teetering on the brink of consciousness, he then went over to the kitchen cabinet where he found the first aid kit.  
  
Mokuba never left Gozaburo's side but his eyes trailed along after Seto pleadingly.  
  
The older opened the box and grabbed a cloth, which he ran under some cold water. Then coming back to the spot he began dabbing gently at his adoptive father's forehead while talking to the crying being beside him.  
  
"Okay Mokuba, I'm sorry." Taking a deep breath he sighed and shook his head. "You probably should go back to bed... Don't worry. I'll take care of this and then be up soon. Everything will be fine in the morning..."  
  
Reluctantly Mokuba got to his feet and then slowly turned to head for the stairwell, but when he reached the bottom he stopped and put his hand against the wall. "Brother?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I love you."  
  
"Yes, I know... I love you too." Casting his gaze over at him he gave a quivering smile. "Sweet dreams."  
  
This made the younger smile as well and he nodded. "Good night."  
  
Seto watched Mokuba run up the stairs and then set to tending to the bruises that were forming on his adoptive father's face. This was his family. This was home. That flickering moment of kindness had scarred him deeper than he ever could have known... So as he dragged the man up onto the couch and covered him with a blanket he stared at him for a second before giving him a small hug. "Good night father..."  
  
*******************  
  
Kaiba tossed and turned in his bed as troubled emotions ripped at his heart and he mumbled to himself through fretted slumber. "I'm sorry Dad..."  
  
A smirking form stood next to him in spirit and then started heading towards the door. "Yeah kid, I know..."  
  
((Well wasn't that a little weird? But HEY! It's another chapter... Lol, sorry if it sort of wavered from everything, but it'll make more sense later. And I'm sorry that it took me two whole weeks to get this thing out . But you all know how school is, and how it is the ultimate of all evils... Well, anyway... Hope you liked! Review please! And I'll get the next one out as soon as I can ^^)) 


	12. Back to Earth

Things at the Motou residence had gotten quite interesting after Kaiba's intrusion that previous night. Mokuba had broken out crying, feeling so guilty for hurting his brother's feelings, and also since he was afraid there would be a blood bath at the house, based on the look in Seto's eyes. Tea had also done her share of having a fit, by grabbing onto one of the pillows and shoving her face into it as she threw herself down on the couch, and it had taken both Tristan, Joey, and Yugi all together to get her to move even the tiniest bit. After that Joey was having a spazz about how Kaiba had to go and ruin absolutely everything, and while Tristan was trying to calm him down, Yugi had his hands full trying to look after Christa who had started chasing Mokuba around, as Mokuba was running away from her muttering sadistic thoughts regarding what his brother might be doing right now, and that was making Christa cry. And while Christa was crying, Tea started getting upset again and buried herself back on the couch. Joey then went over to the couch and started whacking her with a pillow telling her to get over that jerk and get on with life, and Tristan was trying to stop Joey, and Yugi was trying to stop Tristan saying that as long as nobody got hurt it was fine, and then Mokuba was still running around like crazy thinking Seto was trying to shoot himself at home.  
  
And after about a good few hours of chain reaction after chain reaction, things started to get a little calmer. Mokuba had resulted in crying himself into an early coma, and Christa had settled down with him so they were both retired to their sleeping bags on the floor. Tea still hadn't moved from on the couch, and Joey now was in the kitchen making some weird concoction that involved WAY too much ketchup for anyone's own good.  
  
Tea, after driving all concerns she might have had about Seto from her mind, and a small bout of crying, she walked into the kitchen and leaned back on the counter with her arms folded as she wiped her eyes and kept a sideways glance on the blonde.  
  
As Joey took some frozen fish sticks out of the fridge and shoved them in the microwave he then put a few more seafood/fish related things to cook on the stove. Without turning to speak to Tea he was busy stirring one of the pots when he began flatly.  
  
"You know Tea, if he's that important to you, I don't see why you keep lying to yourself..."  
  
This comment surprised the brunette and she stared over at him curiously. "What do you mean Joey?"  
  
Joey sighed and shook his head while he kept stirring and still didn't look at her. "I mean Kaiba, you still like him, it's so obvious."  
  
"Joey... What are you talking about?"  
  
The blonde turned from the stove with an angry glare. "Tea, don't lie. You still have a major crush on him, or else you wouldn't have gotten so upset this afternoon."  
  
"I don't like him." Tea turned away from the gaze to stare off at the floor.  
  
Joey shook his head and went over to take the fish sticks out of the microwave, and walking back over he cut them into smaller pieces and then dumped them in the big bowl of ketchup he'd already made. With still the knife he'd used in his hand he leaned back against the counter and locked his russet orbs on her. "Tea, no offence, but right now if I wasn't your friend, I'd say you were a real bitch."  
  
"What?" Her gaze jumped up to glare at him. "What'd you just say?"  
  
"I said..." His eyes burned fire, "that you're acting like a total and complete bitch."  
  
Tea approached up to him in shock and anger with her orbs narrowed to slits. "Joey, I don't like Kaiba. So just SHUT UP!"  
  
"I'll shut up when you stop LYING to me!" Waggling the knife in her face threateningly, but unintentionally, he clenched his jaw. "So just stop with this STUPID act and tell me the truth!"  
  
"I AM telling you the truth you bastard! I don't love Seto!"  
  
This caused a smile to grow on the blonde's face. "Oh, you don't love SETO, do you?"  
  
"I didn't say that, I said Kaiba!"  
  
Joey shook his head still with the smile and waggled the knife again. "You said Seto. Oh-ho-ho, now what does this tell us?"  
  
"I said Kaiba!"  
  
"Oh shut it Tea." Joey put the knife down on the counter and went to get the scallops off of the stove, and as he was putting them in his monstrous ketchup bowl as well, the next thing that happened sent him into oblivion beyond all reason. Tea grabbed his shoulders and yanked him backwards to shove him on the ground and jump on top of him with her hands on his throat.  
  
"Joey, you idiot!"  
  
The blonde yanked her hands away and rolled her over so that he was pinning her to the floor instead of the other way around.  
  
"This is what I'm talking about! That jerk is converting you to violence and now you aren't even telling your friends the truth! Not even ME!"  
  
"What difference does that make?! I hate you Joey! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" She screamed at the top of her lungs and tried to struggle away but Joey held her firm to the ground and didn't say anything until she was forced to just lie still panting for breath, and she sent him a death glare. "I hate you."  
  
Joey's expression was hurt and pained. He didn't know what to do; here was his best friend, his close friend, Tea, who now because he was trying to help her out had tried almost attacking him.  
  
Leaning his face in close to hers he stared into her eyes and whispered gently. "Tea, please... Don't get upset with me. I'm just trying to help you out..."  
  
"I hate you!!!"  
  
Joey shook his head and the hurt in his eyes grew more. "Tea, come on, just calm down. Listen to me for a second!"  
  
She brought up her struggling again as tears formed in the edge of her eyes. "Joey, let me go!"  
  
The pain he could see she was going through lanced through him as well and before he could stop himself he found his lips meeting her cheeks a couple of times and he whispered in between. "Shh, Tea, shhhh... It's okay... It's okay..."  
  
Tea froze. Shocked, confused, angry, all at the same time, and if the fact that it was JOEY kissing her wasn't enough, she was actually beginning to find it quite enjoyable.  
  
Finding now that she could move her hands again she took them, and she ran her fingers through the blonde locks. And the next thing she knew, she and Joey were both in a kiss that neither of them wanted to get away from.  
  
It didn't last long though as Joey pulled himself away with a nail driven through his skull and back away from Tea up against the wall. "God, god, god... Holy shit, shit, shit... Tea, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that."  
  
Tea got up and walked over to him to wrap her arms around and give him a hug. "Joey, it's okay..."  
  
The blonde quick as he could pushed her arms away and locked gazes with her. "Tea, no, it's not. Now listen, you need to talk to Kaiba, NOW. I don't want to hurt you, and even if you aren't going to admit it, I think you still like him. Please, oh please just go talk to him, just for a little bit." Turning away from her he clenched his fist. "I'm going to go home for the night, but... As far as this goes...? It never happened, is that all right with you?"  
  
She nodded a silent understanding and he smiled to turn back to her and give a small kiss to her cheek. "Thanks Tea for understanding, now go talk to Kaiba. I'm sure he misses you, otherwise he wouldn't have come all the way over here tonight to apolagize for whatever he did."  
  
******************************  
  
And as such, that had been what brought Tea to the spot where she was right now. Standing on the steps of the Kaiba mansion, hovering by the door, contemplating whether to knock, or whether to just run away at this late hour at night.  
  
She had considered the fact that it was almost midnight, since Kaiba had stopped by at almost eight, and then with everything else... Now it was this time. Her mind had tried using the excuse that she didn't want to wake him up, but most likely she was figuring that he was still awake.  
  
Swallowing hard she clamped her eyes shut and pushed the doorbell once. There was no answer, so she pushed it again.  
  
Still with no answer coming from the inside she tried the doorknob and found the place open.  
  
Taking a few wary steps inside the dark place she heard some sounds from downstairs... Approaching the basement door she opened it quietly, and just as silently made her way down the stairs until she could just crouch down and be able to see what was going on.  
  
*******************  
  
Kaiba, after his last flashback, had once more had his other dream. The one that he had almost thought himself rid of, since it hadn't bothered him for what seemed like forever, but what were really just a few nights.  
  
The twist however this time, was that when he'd left from burying Mokuba in the backyard, there had been Tea. She'd just been standing there, watching him, and as he was about to go inside, trying to ignore her, she had come up to him, grabbed his arm, kissed his cheek and let a small tear trickle down her face as she said.  
  
"I miss you Seto, please don't leave me alone. I miss you."  
  
And so as the rest went on a fast forward, that last came back to haunt him, since when he had tried to hold her, tell her that everything was going to be okay. She then disappeared, slipped through his fingers and changed into a mist that when he tried to grab at it, ended up destroying her. And as he tried she kept crying out.  
  
"I miss you Seto, please, come home. I miss you."  
  
So now here at midnight, in the middle of the night, of every night that cursed him, he was walking around, pacing in circles as cold sweat from both mental fatigue and frustration built on him. Every couple or so cycles he'd stop at a wall and start attacking the plaster with his fists, cursing the very existence of the whole thing.  
  
After about maybe the hundredth circle around the room when he stopped to attack his wall, haunting images swept through his brain and he instead rested both of his hands against the flat surface and started shaking with a few hot tears running down his face.  
  
"Damn you all, damn you all to bloody hell. I was only trying to help when I dumped her. And now this is happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? I've told you that I miss her, that I want her back, that I NEED her back. But you all just have to go and take her away from me again. I haven't done anything! All I ever did was try to make things better. Alright, alright, so maybe I'm a stupid idiot, but at least I'm trying."  
  
Shaking his head a few crystalline droplets could be seen falling from his face to the finished floor bellow. Taking his arm he let the fabric of his pajamas soak up the salty liquid before he sat down on the floor staring up at the ceiling muttering to himself.  
  
"How many times have I told you Tea... I don't want to be alone anymore? I know you hate me. I've seen the way that you can't even stand being around me anymore. I must have hurt you too much for you to ever forgive me... But if I can find it inside me to forgive Gozaburo, even if it's too late now to say anything to him, why can't you forgive me this? Maybe nobody can really be forgiven until they're dead. Maybe that's the answer to everything, all right then, yeah, okay, I get the message. Maybe then you'll be able to forgive me all that I've done to hurt you, and I'm sorry, I'm so very sorry Tea. I love you, and I'll miss you..."  
  
Getting up from the floor his eye immediately locked onto Tea who was standing in the stairwell watching him and he cast his head off to the side and cursed. "Dammit, now I'm imagining things..."  
  
Tea, upon seeing that he saw her, found it best to come down from the stairwell and stand uncomfortably at the bottom. "Um... Hey Kaiba..."  
  
He let a sigh escape his lips and looked at the ceiling in a god-help-me sort of way. "Hey Tea..."  
  
"Well, you know... I just sort of stopped by, and I-"  
  
"At twelve o'clock at night? Nice try, but I think you're just here to drive me insane." Walking over he put his hand on her shoulder and smiled before flicking the ends of her hair. "You've decided to be solid for now I see, well, oh well, all's fair in love and war."  
  
Tea gave him a strange look but then walked away from him to the other side of the room. "So anyway, how have things between you and Mokuba been? He seemed really upset earlier..."  
  
Seto squinted his eyes at her. This wasn't how it was supposed to work. Tea wasn't supposed to talk to him about Mokuba, or anything really real, cause this wasn't real; he was just being his delusional self in the middle of the night. "Um, well, sort of fine... I'd guess..."  
  
"It didn't look like it was fine." She turned back to face him and walk over to stare into his eyes. "What's wrong Seto, tell me... What's wrong with you?"  
  
Seto turned away from her, avoiding the eyes, forever avoiding the eyes... It was too real, just too real for him to deal with right now. "Tea, I think you should go..."  
  
But he found that she came around again, to stand in front of him, and again lock into his icy orbs. "It's not that hard of a question Seto."  
  
He didn't break away, couldn't break away, but he saw something she saw in him that he knew she didn't like. It was back, that strange wall between them that was built from long kept emotions; his was back in place and made that small distance between them an abyss far beyond the comprehension of human life. "I- I can't Tea... I just can't..."  
  
She lifted her hand and gently stroked the side of his face as she kept staring into his orbs, there it would be, but then it would disappear. It was like he was holding himself back, but at the same moment longing to break free. The inner pain he was suffering tore her own heart and she wrapped her arms around him in a hug. It'd been so long, it'd been so very long since she'd been this close to him, been able to feel his body heat against hers and she whispered. "I missed you..."  
  
He chuckled dryly and shook his head, not daring to put his arms around her in fear that he was still just imagining all of this, it was just like his dream. "Tea... Please just go..." 'Don't torture me like this.'  
  
Tea pulled away so she could look at him and giggled. "And leave you like this when you're on the verge of suicide? Not likely."  
  
"I- I wasn't-"  
  
"Seto, I know you were... I heard you talking, don't lie to me."  
  
Guiltily his gaze went to the floor, but she brought it back gently as she lifted his chin. "Next time you get depressed, just try calling me, okay? Don't assume things. I'd never want you to die, and it would never prove anything to me." Taking her fingers gently she brushed a few bangs out of his face and softly smiled with a whisper. "Don't depend on yourself so much."  
  
He rolled his eyes, unable to take this all as true. "Yeah, like in your song right?"  
  
"Yeah, like in my song..." Tea smiled and took a step away from him. "So do you feel like talking about it? Or would you rather talk tomorrow?"  
  
Seto looked off to the side for a second and then came back up. "Let me just see something..." Coming to her he lifted her chin up and placed his lips against hers; pulling away a few moments later he smiled. "I think I'll talk tomorrow."  
  
Tea nodded and hovered on the lingering kiss with a smile. "Okay..." She sort of wanted to stay, but giving his hand a little squeeze she then let her arm trail off and released it before heading for the stairs. "I'll see you tomorrow Seto."  
  
Letting a smile trace his lips her nodded. "Yes, tomorrow."  
  
********************  
  
Tea came back to the sleepover a while later, everyone had already since gone to bed, and so she crept inside and into her sleeping bag with a happy smile on her face. She'd talked to Seto, her Seto, and she was going to talk to him tomorrow. 'Talk, we're going to talk...' She gave a contented sigh and snuggled into her pillow. Tomorrow was going to be a good day...  
  
((Sorry that took me so long... I'll talk to you people later! PLEASE review, thank you for the lovely other reviews all of you ^_^ See you later. I'll try to get the next one up as soon as possible!)) 


	13. Square One

"Hey Tea, you need a ride, or are you all set?"  
  
Tristan had taken up the role of carpool since Joey left. 'Which reminds me... I have to ask him about that.' Grabbing the keys up off the kitchen table he walked over to the brunette and waved a hand in front of her dazed face.  
  
"Hello? Earth to Tea... Anybody in there?"  
  
"Oh, what?" She snapped out of her daydream blinking. "Did you say something?"  
  
Tristan rolled his eyes. "Just wondering if you needed a ride home. But man, you've sure been spacey ever since you came back from- hey, where did you go last night anyhow?" Nobody ever told him anything.  
  
Tea looked away and mumbled something under her breath that he couldn't comprehend.  
  
"Mm... What?"  
  
Hey gaze came back to him annoyed. "Out. Okay? I just went out."  
  
He shrugged, "Okay, fine. It's fine with me. But back to where we started... Do you need a ride?"  
  
"I could take Mokuba home."  
  
Another shrug. "Yeah, but I'm offering. So I'm guessing you're staying longer then...?"  
  
"No, it's fine." She snatched the keys out of his hand and smiled sweetly. "Really, no trouble."  
  
Tristan's expression twisted in confusion as he stared at her. "Um... are you feeling okay?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine. Why do you ask?" The same sweet smile accompanied her face.  
  
"Stop that. It's creepy when you smile like that. I just thought it was weird that in all of about twelve hours you've gone from happy, to spastically sad, to angry-" He'd heard her and Joey screaming at each other last night, it was hard not to... "Then to just plain spacey, and now you're being this creepy happy like you know some dirty little secret." He then raised an eyebrow and stared at her quizzically, but with humor tinted behind it. "You weren't out getting laid last night... were you?"  
  
"No!" Tea's face burned a bright red, her mind had skipped over to Seto, of course, and it had been slightly related to what Tristan said, and the image from that she found to be embarrassing to be even thinking about.  
  
Tristan noticed her flush and this made him smile; it was always fun to playfully torture his friends. "Oh, sorry. My mistake. Of course, what was I thinking? It IS Tea we're talking about here after all..."  
  
"Heeeey, what's that supposed to mean?"  
  
He shrugged. "Nothing. Just that who in their right mind would want to screw you?"  
  
Tea put her hands on her hips and scowled. "I should be insulted! But... you know... I do know somebody, in their right mind, who WOULD want to sleep with me..." Her voice trailed off to a taunting low and that innocent smile reappeared on her lips.  
  
"What? Is this Tea I'm talking to? Our innocent little girl who would do no wrong?" His hand went over his mouth in a mock gasp. "Tea! I'm appalled!"  
  
"You think I'm kidding, don't you?"  
  
He dropped his sarcasm and smiled, "What do you think?"  
  
"I'm not though..."  
  
"Sure you aren't." The sarcasm popped right back in.  
  
"I'm not! Besides, it's not like anyone would even get in a miles distance of having you be their f-"  
  
"Tea!" Yugi had been hearing them from the other room for a little while, and had decided to come in just at that exact moment. His eyes were spread wide and staring at the beautiful brunette. Everything in the house had gotten scrambled beyond all belief, and now his innocent friend, Tea, had been having fights with his other friend, Joey, enough to drive both of them out of the house for a while, and one for the entire night... And now she was swearing at Tristan? 'Why is she acting like this?' He was running his violet orbs over her face, trying to figure her out, trying to figure out what angle, or what planet at least, she was coming from.  
  
"What?" Defensively she crossed her arms and frowned at him. "I'm just saying that no one would want to f-"  
  
"Tea!" Yugi covered his ears and shut his eyes. "Be quiet! What's gotten into you?"  
  
Tristan, seeing the potentiality of this no longer just being a playful back and forth argument that everyone would laugh at later, but instead a real fight, took a step in to calm the chaos. "Hey guys, come on. Just forget it. Why don't we do something else?"  
  
"It's HER fault!" Yugi pointed accusingly at Tea. "She's- She's- Tristan!" His face gave enough explanation, the kind that says 'Come on man, you know where I'm coming from. This is TEA we're talking about here. You can't possibly be siding with HER. She's being just plain nasty!'  
  
The brunette looked between either one of his friends. If he sided with Tea, Yugi's upset, if he sided with Yugi, then Tea's upset. "Um..." His head jam filled and his worries overcrowding him, Tristan did the only thing he could think of, and the one thing he could always do right... panic. "GottaGo! Talk to you guys later! Bye!"  
  
He bolted for the door and ran straight out of the house, leaving Tea there staring at Yugi, and Yugi there staring at Tea.  
  
Both of them were confused at what just happened, and Tea, still being upset with Yugi for getting hyped up over a little thing of just swearing, followed Tristan's example and went out the door.  
  
And that would mean that Yugi was left in the house, with Mokuba and Christa both still there, and him left without the car keys, and no driver's license upon himself either. So what had started out with the simple question to Tea "do you need a ride?" had blown out into the full- scale argument, and the original purpose of having Mokuba and Christa taken home was forgotten entirely.  
  
Yugi turned around and went back into the living room, where Mokuba and Christa were loyally sitting glued to the television, oblivious to it all. Sitting down on the couch next to them he set his eyes to the screen as well. 'If Joey wants to leave because of Tea, let him, he'll be back eventually. If Tristan wants to leave because of Tea, let him. If I want Tea to leave because she's being rude, let her... Mokuba and Christa will just have to go home later.'  
  
*********************  
  
Kaiba was sitting at his desk typing away at his computer as the language that only he understood rambled through the passages of his brain. There was so much to think about, so much to do, so much to avoid... Was last night real? Or was he just imagining it... Was Tea really there? Or was he just dreaming... Had he really forgotten Mokuba, dumped Tea, think he'd tried to murder everyone, go insane, come back, try to commit suicide, become a cutter, and become the sixteen-year-old CEO of a big multi- national company that depended on his every program and thought to survive, and if he made a single mistake his life would be left in ruin? Did his parents really die? Was Mokuba really born? Was he really just a five-year- old boy sitting home at his house playing video games while he sat on the living room floor and his mother was making chocolate chip cookies in the kitchen?  
  
It was all so confusing, and he was loosing his grip between reality and dreams.  
  
As his fingers flew over keys, he couldn't even begin to answer even the simplest question that was running through his head. Three words, and he couldn't find an answer. Who am I? He thought it sounded like some sad soap opera, but he didn't know. Was he Seto Kaiba, cooperate executive of Kaiba Corp? Or was he Seto, the little boy who just wanted to play his game?  
  
Program after program, business meeting after business meeting, annoying client, fixing problems, making sure salaries didn't overrun the company... His brain was multitasking all of this when it was halted by the doorbell.  
  
He gave a frustrated sigh and jammed his fingers down onto the keyboard. Then, getting up from his desk he left his office and ran down the stairs. 'Mokuba, it's probably Mokuba...'  
  
When he opened up the door he found it to be NOT Mokuba in the least and an uncomfortable swarm came over him.  
  
"Oh... um... hey Tea. What are you doing here?"  
  
She smiled at him. "You told me I could come back. Remember?"  
  
"Oh, right." It came out cold and flat as he turned away from her with the open door. "Come on in."  
  
Tea walked in the door and followed him into the living room where she sat down on couch and looked up at him still smiling. "So... How've you been?"  
  
"Fine."  
  
She cocked her head. "Just fine?"  
  
"Fine." His icy orbs didn't even bother fazing her as he held his hands behind his back and stared blankly at her face, but not really at her, much like he did at work... Looking through people.  
  
"You're acting kind of weird, is everything alright?"  
  
"Tea." He paused. What to say? What to say? He found this awkward beyond all human reason, and when he didn't feel like opening up... It was very hard for him to break that barrier. Here he knew he could, but his subconscious kept driving it into his skull. 'It's Tea, it's Tea. Forget about it. She's Tea. You dumped her, you don't get second chances with these things. She doesn't want you. She wants somebody else, somebody much closer to her...' "Why did you bother coming back?"  
  
Harsh, very harsh, the second it split his lips he knew that's what it was and he wanted to slap himself for it. 'Why did you bother coming back? Excellent way to try and patch things up you moron...' He saw her face twist and he looked away and mumbled. "Look, I didn't mean for it to come out li-"  
  
"Jerk!"  
  
Palm met cheek and his head shot right back up to stare at her. Putting a hand against the red skin he made sure she hadn't opened up the scabs from the night before and then bore holes through her with his eyes.  
  
"Gardner, I don't know what's gotten into, but that's the third time you've slapped me in two days. Now I can't tell you why, but you've changed. The Tea I knew five months ago wouldn't have dared to touch someone in such an abrasive way. And if you ever, I mean EVER, try to do that again... I swear, that it will be your last chance to do so." 'I've had my share of beatings, but none can compare to that of someone who's supposed to be caring for you.'  
  
Tea noticed the fire the was lifted behind his irises and she back up a little. "Seto-"  
  
"And don't call me Seto. Gardner, right now you've sent yourself away from me all the way to America for what I care. Maybe I loved Tea, but not this Tea. If you really were in my basement last night, and not just some figment of my imagination... Then I can't explain why you came, or what you were looking for. But right now, I was trying to apologize. And you slapped me. I've had cuts over my entire body, and I don't care to have anymore, thank you very much. Now either you could please leave-" His body had started quivering in a rage of torment for himself. "Or, or you can try to explain. But Gardner, you've lost yourself. You've crushed your own wings. I don't care if you don't, or ever did, love me. I'm not going to get anywhere near you until you find yourself again. I will not set myself up for abuse Gardner!"  
  
"Seto-"  
  
"It's Kaiba! That's all I am to you Gardner." His hand reached into his pocket and he pulled out one of those soft velvet boxes and jammed into her own palm and he whispered. "And that's all I'll ever be. Nothing more, nothing less. It's just Kaiba. You know him, and you might not hate him anymore... But that's still all I am to you. Just Kaiba."  
  
He turned away from her and walked straight up the stairs and slammed the door to his office. Falling down on the couch he buried his face in his hands and meshed his fingers in his hair. "Where have you gone my little princess? What have you done to yourself?"  
  
*********************  
  
Downstairs, Tea opened up the little velvety case that had been shoved upon her. As soon as she did her eyes went wide and her gaze darted from the stairs and back a couple of times.  
  
"Oh Seto..."  
  
Closing it again a little tear dribbled down her cheek. A ring, he'd bought a ring. She sat down hard on the couch, lost for words and she stared at the black shrine in her palm and pain coursed through her body. 'I'm sorry...'  
  
((Sorry that took so long. But here it is! Hope you people enjoyed it ^_^ More ideas should be coming out sooner. Hehehe! I'm so happy! ::hugs herself:: Ok, sorry.. But anyway. Next one should come out in two weeks or so I'm betting, it seems to be working that way.. Review please!)) 


	14. Getting Lost

((Okay, my lovely people that are going to get SO confused... This chapter is long, and as said before, confusing. It's only long because it's a HUGE dialogue for the most part. Hope you like it. And give me your feedback. If it's really bad then tell me what you're confused on exactly and I'll try to explain it in the next ooc chunk I give ya. Okay, ttyl. Enjoy!))  
  
How does it feel Kaiba? How does it feel to have everything you've ever wanted ripped out from underneath you in one fell swoop?  
  
"Leave me alone..."  
  
What? Don't feel like talking? Is little Seto afraid of the big mean scary man?  
  
"No, I just want you to shut up, and leave me alone."  
  
If you aren't afraid then why can't you talk about it?  
  
"There's no point..."  
  
Just like everything you've ever said. Why do you do this? Everything you do has to be analyzed to death. Why don't you just try and be normal?  
  
"Normal people are morons..."  
  
But at least they're happy.  
  
"Did I ASK for your opinion?"  
  
I don't know. Did you?  
  
"No."  
  
But you want to know what I think.  
  
"There's a difference."  
  
Oh really? And what's that?  
  
"You're opinion is worth nothing, what you're thinking has at least some basis for itself."  
  
And here you go again with the analyzing...  
  
"I thought I asked you to leave me alone?"  
  
You didn't ask, you ordered.  
  
"Is there a difference?"  
  
A big one.  
  
"Then what is it?"  
  
And now you want my opinion?  
  
"Sure... it's not like it matters anyway..."  
  
You're giving up again, aren't you?  
  
"Why shouldn't I? Mokuba's betrayed me; Tea's betrayed me... All of my dreams- it seems like their meanings keep becoming realities... I never should've bought that ring."  
  
But it was what you wanted.  
  
"I wanted it then. Now I'm not sure... I'm not sure of anything anymore..."  
  
You know, you have a strange pattern of going in circles.  
  
"But I always skip a step."  
  
Oh? And which one is that?  
  
"The one where I become happy again..."  
  
That's only because you don't need it.  
  
"And why do you say that?"  
  
I don't know. Why do you?  
  
"But I don't."  
  
Yes you do, why else do you think you skip it? You're mind doesn't consider happiness part of the cycle anymore. It's a program Seto, and why bother wasting your time with the unnecessary? It's not like happiness really achieves anything.  
  
"But then why am I so miserable?"  
  
Because it makes you happy.  
  
"It makes me happy to be miserable?"  
  
You're miserable because you're happy.  
  
"That doesn't make anything sense..."  
  
And you think it's supposed to?  
  
"No."  
  
Then why did you ask?  
  
"I was hoping it might."  
  
And that's what frustrates you.  
  
"What?"  
  
Things that don't make sense.  
  
"Well yes, but doesn't everybody?"  
  
Everybody who's trying to make themselves a machine.  
  
"And how am I doing that?"  
  
You want the facts Seto, and you're trying to live on them. It's like your computer, you give it programs, it spits out the data. The programs you give it are all set and true, no questions, just answers. Why do you think you're so confused, hm? It's because your life has too many questions and not enough answers. Because all of your answers would lead to happiness, and the one thing your mind does know is that happiness is a waste of time.  
  
"But I don't want that anymore."  
  
Are you sure about that?  
  
"Not exactly..."  
  
Then it's not going to change.  
  
"Just like Tea?"  
  
You depend on her too much.  
  
"I have no one else to depend on."  
  
What about yourself?  
  
"I don't trust myself."  
  
Then why are you listening?  
  
"Because there's no one else to listen to."  
  
So you go with the last resort... Good strategy.  
  
"You don't have to be sarcastic about it."  
  
Why don't you try getting some real help?  
  
"Like a psychiatrist?"  
  
If that's what you're thinking.  
  
"But they'd probably put me on drugs and send me to a mental institution. I don't want Mokuba to have foster parents."  
  
Are you sure that's not what He wants?  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Mokuba wants a family, Seto. Why do you think he idolizes you so much?  
  
"He doesn't seem to anymore..."  
  
It's only because you're abandoning him.  
  
"I'm not meaning to."  
  
At least you know you are.  
  
"It was an honest mistake."  
  
But one that could've been prevented easily.  
  
"I was trying to be a good example. What has fighting ever proved?"  
  
Who's stronger.  
  
"In what? Muscle strength? ... You don't need muscles as long as your know where you're going in life."  
  
Then why do you bother using them?  
  
"Because I like the power."  
  
No, you like the control it gives you.  
  
"Aren't they the same thing?"  
  
Power without a purpose has no control at all. Power with a purpose gives you control.  
  
"So then why do I want to stop?"  
  
Because you know it's wrong.  
  
"To have control?"  
  
No, to dictate it by your power.  
  
"So you're saying it should be more of a democratic system."  
  
Isn't that what the Five are in your company?  
  
"The one's who betrayed me?"  
  
They lost their heads.  
  
"And I've lost mine."  
  
Only because you don't want to find it.  
  
"How are you so sure of all this?"  
  
Because you are.  
  
"I am?"  
  
I don't know. Are you?  
  
"You make no sense."  
  
Am I supposed to?  
  
"I don't know."  
  
Then why are we talking about it?  
  
"Because it's something to talk about."  
  
Is that your reasoning for everything?  
  
"Sometimes."  
  
Only when you're being difficult.  
  
"And why shouldn't I be?"  
  
Because if you can't talk to yourself then you can't talk to anybody.  
  
"I can talk to Tea."  
  
Not anymore.  
  
"Any why not?"  
  
Because you don't trust her.  
  
"I do to some point."  
  
But not the point that you need.  
  
"Now you're being difficult."  
  
It's a talent.  
  
"Or rather a curse."  
  
One that you've brought upon yourself.  
  
"Not with an intention to."  
  
But there had to be some thought involved with it.  
  
"When I wasn't thinking clearly."  
  
When you were thinking with your heart.  
  
"I don't have a heart."  
  
Not one that you'll admit to having.  
  
"Could you please stop?"  
  
Stop what?  
  
"Accusing me of things that aren't true."  
  
You don't want to have a heart?  
  
"I used to."  
  
And why not now?  
  
"They hurt too much."  
  
But with all great loss comes great happiness.  
  
"I thought you said I couldn't be happy?"  
  
I said you didn't want to be. I never said it was impossible.  
  
"You're going in circles."  
  
I follow my master.  
  
"I thought we were supposed to be a democracy?"  
  
We're supposed to, but that doesn't mean we are.  
  
"How CAN we have a democracy without a legislature?"  
  
We vote on it.  
  
"On who?"  
  
On yourself.  
  
"That sounds more like a dictatorship again."  
  
But that's what you want.  
  
"I want to be happy."  
  
Is that what you really want?  
  
"I don't know. Is it?"  
  
It might be.  
  
"Then we'll just say it is."  
  
That's using a false statement for a base.  
  
"Which means we can prove anything."  
  
And you want to prove everything?  
  
"Only what matters."  
  
And what matters?  
  
"I don't know."  
  
Then what are you trying to prove?  
  
"Something to myself."  
  
We have all day. You're going to have to tell me.  
  
"I can't tell you because I don't know."  
  
Or do you not know because you can't tell me?  
  
"How on Earth would that work?"  
  
Do we have to be on Earth?  
  
"Unless you were in a space ship."  
  
Ah, but then a spaceship is always trying to recreate the earth in space, isn't it?  
  
"We'd die otherwise."  
  
Or would you really start living?  
  
"Death isn't living."  
  
You used to think it was.  
  
"I used to think Coco Puffs tasted good too."  
  
Don't they still?  
  
"I haven't had them."  
  
Then how do you not know?  
  
"I'm an adult now. I shouldn't be eating sugar filled nonsense."  
  
Since when is sixteen an adult?  
  
"Since a sixteen year old has a family to provide for."  
  
And is ignoring Mokuba providing for him?  
  
"I don't ignore him. I just have work."  
  
You know you work more than you need to.  
  
"I have nothing better to do."  
  
Then what about Mokuba?  
  
"He doesn't need me anymore. You saw how he treated me."  
  
He was upset, you would've acted the same way if you were his age.  
  
"I never talked back when I was ten."  
  
Because you were afraid.  
  
"Stop saying that!"  
  
That you're afraid? Why? Does it bother you?  
  
"Don't act dumb, you know it does."  
  
It's only because it's true.  
  
"It's a weakness."  
  
Humans have weaknesses.  
  
"My weakness is my pride."  
  
And you know this.  
  
"Yes."  
  
Then it's not a weakness.  
  
"And why not?"  
  
If you know it's a weakness then you can work to fix it.  
  
"But that doesn't mean I will."  
  
Pride is something you've already fixed.  
  
"How?"  
  
You've loved.  
  
"But I lost it."  
  
Then why did you bother showing Tea the ring? You know it hurt you.  
  
"It didn't seem right to keep it. It's not like I'm going to get married anyway..."  
  
But don't you want to?  
  
"I want a family."  
  
Then you want to get married.  
  
"Only if it's the right thing to do."  
  
Is jumping off a cliff the right thing to do?  
  
"At the time it was."  
  
But not anymore...  
  
"Yes. Not anymore."  
  
So you're over that?  
  
"Yes."  
  
But you still love Tea.  
  
"No?"  
  
Why are you asking me?  
  
"Because I'm not sure."  
  
Why don't you ask her?  
  
"Because she'd lie."  
  
Are you sure?  
  
"No."  
  
Then why don't you ask?  
  
"I'm afraid to."  
  
You just denied that a minute ago.  
  
"I know."  
  
Are you sure you know?  
  
"No."  
  
Then we're getting somewhere.  
  
"You make no sense."  
  
We've already established this.  
  
"I know."  
  
Then why are you saying it?  
  
"Because there's nothing better to say."  
  
You're going in circles.  
  
"We've already established this as well."  
  
Getting smarter I see.  
  
"No smarter than I was."  
  
Then you're pride is coming back.  
  
"It makes me feel secure."  
  
From what?  
  
"Pain."  
  
You love pain, you know it.  
  
"Pain makes me miserable."  
  
And being miserable makes you happy.  
  
"I don't want to be miserable."  
  
You don't want to be happy either.  
  
"I thought I did."  
  
You did, but now you don't.  
  
"Why can't I go back to wanting it again?"  
  
I don't know. Why can't you?  
  
"Because I'm trying to do too much..."  
  
And what is that exactly?  
  
"Raise Mokuba, be a brother, be a parental figure, be a human, try to decide whether I'm happy in life, try to rethink my whole frame of mind, have a love life, fix the love live, and figure out who I am at the same time."  
  
Forty-two.  
  
"What does that have to do with anything?"  
  
You've never read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?  
  
"I don't remember it if I did."  
  
So then you were human.  
  
"What do you mean were?"  
  
It's the answer to the universe life and everything.  
  
"What?"  
  
That's what forty-two is.  
  
"We're not talking about that anymore."  
  
Now we are.  
  
"You're trying to drive me insane."  
  
You already are.  
  
"But I don't think I am."  
  
Insane people don't think they're insane.  
  
"But same people think they're insane?"  
  
No.  
  
"Then how do you know if you are or not?"  
  
Somebody tells you.  
  
"Who?"  
  
Just somebody.  
  
"You're being vague."  
  
I'm being normal.  
  
"There is no normal."  
  
In some places.  
  
"Really?"  
  
No.  
  
"Then why did you say there were?"  
  
Because that's what you wanted to hear.  
  
"I want the truth."  
  
But can you handle it?  
  
"I can try."  
  
You need to see a psychiatrist.  
  
"I told you, no."  
  
You never said that.  
  
"I didn't?"  
  
I don't know. Did you?  
  
"I forget."  
  
So you ARE human.  
  
"But I'll never admit it."  
  
When you're alone you will.  
  
"But only then."  
  
It's at least a start.  
  
"After the gun shot five years ago."  
  
Better late than never.  
  
"Better never than late."  
  
Are you sure that's the logic you want to use?  
  
"If it'll make me happy."  
  
It'll make you miserable.  
  
"Then isn't that my definition of happy?"  
  
Not anymore.  
  
"It's changed that quickly?"  
  
It only took us six years.  
  
"It only took us finding Tea."  
  
The first time you saw her you didn't think so.  
  
"The first time I saw her I didn't love her."  
  
And what changed all that?  
  
"She cared."  
  
But does she now?  
  
"I need to ask her."  
  
Slapping someone doesn't seem very caring.  
  
"Then I'll kill myself."  
  
I thought you were over that?  
  
"I am."  
  
Then why did you say it?  
  
"It was just a thought."  
  
But one you'd never carry out.  
  
"In my next lifetime."  
  
If you make it that far.  
  
"I'm pretty sure I will."  
  
And are you happy about that?  
  
"About being sure, yes."  
  
Because you want control.  
  
"Because I want peace."  
  
Control is your peace?  
  
"Sometimes."  
  
If Tea told you to would you see the psychiatrist?  
  
"If she really thought that's what would be best."  
  
What if Mokuba told you?  
  
"He's too young to understand."  
  
Weren't you too young?  
  
"I had no choice."  
  
But you made yourself ready.  
  
"And almost killed myself in the process."  
  
You did kill yourself.  
  
"Only my inner child."  
  
Which is who you want to be.  
  
"But can't be anymore."  
  
You can raise the dead.  
  
"Heh, if only it were that easy."  
  
You miss your mom and dad.  
  
"They're rotting corpses. I don't need them."  
  
But you still want them.  
  
"But I don't need them."  
  
Needing and wanting are entirely different.  
  
"Needing decides what you want."  
  
So do you need Mokuba?  
  
"I guess not..."  
  
Then why would it matter if you got sent to an institution?  
  
"I'm afraid of what they might find out."  
  
You're afraid of opening up.  
  
"Because I'm afraid of getting hurt."  
  
You've already been hurt. You just haven't loved.  
  
"I loved Tea."  
  
You thought you loved Tea.  
  
"And why is it just that?"  
  
Because she never loved you back.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
She kissed Joey.  
  
"Wheeler?"  
  
She was lonely.  
  
"Does she love him?"  
  
No.  
  
"Does he love her?"  
  
No.  
  
"Then why did they kiss?"  
  
Because they're instincts told them to.  
  
"Instincts are for animals."  
  
Animals are happy.  
  
"I don't want to be an animal."  
  
Then you don't want to be happy.  
  
"Then are you saying Mokuba does?"  
  
Subconsciously.  
  
"So everyone subconsciously wants to be an animal?"  
  
You can generally tell. You see it in their personalities.  
  
"That sounds like something a psychic would say."  
  
And psychics are sometimes right.  
  
"But not always."  
  
They are human.  
  
"But they're pretending not to be."  
  
Just like you.  
  
"I'm not pretending."  
  
It's a game. You're playing it.  
  
"Then why do I keep playing it?"  
  
Because you keep telling yourself it's fun.  
  
"But it really isn't."  
  
Then stop playing.  
  
"But I don't know how."  
  
Then guess.  
  
"Is that really the answer?"  
  
There is no answer.  
  
"Then how can I go on?"  
  
It's chess Seto.  
  
"I hate chess."  
  
You used to.  
  
"Not anymore though?"  
  
You're really unsure of yourself.  
  
"I know."  
  
There isn't always going to be an answer.  
  
"I like to think there is."  
  
Stop thinking, start doing.  
  
"But how can I?"  
  
Wake up.  
  
"How can I wake up when the world is so dark outside?"  
  
Get a flashlight.  
  
"Something?"  
  
Somebody.  
  
"But I thought I wasn't supposed to depend on people."  
  
Not to the point when they're life is yours.  
  
"Have I really gotten that bad?"  
  
Why do you think you're parents kill you in your dream?  
  
"Because I was supposed to be back home with Tea."  
  
No, because you wanted to go back.  
  
"But why? I had a family."  
  
Had is the key word in that sentence.  
  
"Can't I ever have one again?"  
  
If you think that's what's best.  
  
"I do."  
  
Then do it.  
  
"But why?"  
  
Because you can.  
  
"You're starting to sound like me."  
  
I am you.  
  
"Then why do you keep contradicting me?"  
  
Because you contradict yourself.  
  
"If I know this then why don't I fix it?"  
  
Because you won't trust yourself to fix it.  
  
"I try to."  
  
You keep one foot on home base while trying to run to first. It doesn't work...  
  
"I'm trying to protect myself."  
  
They turtle who stays in his shell never gets anywhere.  
  
"I have a company to run."  
  
That's an excuse.  
  
"But a legitimate one."  
  
Legitimacy isn't always the best choice.  
  
"Like the chicken?"  
  
You still remember that joke?  
  
"It's a popular concept."  
  
But one that I'd think a CEO would have no purpose for.  
  
"I have sentiments, but not many."  
  
Not many that you remember.  
  
"So why did the chicken cross the road?"  
  
You've forgotten?  
  
"No. I'm trying to be happy."  
  
You're scaring me.  
  
"I scare myself."  
  
That's what I just said.  
  
"So you are me?"  
  
In a sense.  
  
"What sense?"  
  
It's called schizophrenic.  
  
"That's a mental disorder."  
  
One that you have.  
  
"But don't want to have."  
  
Not my problem.  
  
"Maybe I should see a psychiatrist."  
  
Definitely.  
  
"Are you sure Mokuba will be happy?"  
  
That you're gone?  
  
"Yeah."  
  
No.  
  
"He won't?"  
  
He loves you.  
  
"Then maybe I shouldn't..."  
  
He'll be worse off if you don't go.  
  
"But it seems so idiotic. After all of this to just break down and see a psychiatrist."  
  
They're there to help. It's their job.  
  
"Then I should leave it to the people who really need it."  
  
And you don't?  
  
"I don't think I so."  
  
You're unsure of yourself again.  
  
"I'm not sure of anything."  
  
Except that you need help.  
  
"But I don't want it."  
  
That doesn't mean you don't need it.  
  
"Leave me alone."  
  
Only if you leave yourself alone.  
  
"I'm not going to kill myself."  
  
That wasn't what I was implying.  
  
"Then what were you?"  
  
To get to the other side.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
That's why the chicken crossed the road.  
  
"I asked that a while back."  
  
You still asked it.  
  
"Am I really this confusing?"  
  
When you want to be.  
  
"I'm thinking that's all the time."  
  
You're the human puzzle.  
  
"Do I want to be?"  
  
You want to be solved.  
  
"And will I ever?"  
  
Never.  
  
"So why do I wish for it?"  
  
It's a dream.  
  
"One that will kill me."  
  
One that will save you.  
  
"How?"  
  
Ask Tea.  
  
"I thought I couldn't depend on her?"  
  
Not right now.  
  
"So what are you suggesting?"  
  
Take a vacation.  
  
"And what purpose would that serve?"  
  
It would give you a break. That's generally what vacations are for.  
  
"A break from what?"  
  
Life.  
  
"Isn't that death?"  
  
That's a sleep.  
  
"I heard that in a quote once."  
  
That you found in high school.  
  
"I'm still in high school."  
  
My point exactly.  
  
"What did it say?"  
  
'Thou fool, what is sleep but the image of death? Fate will give an eternal rest.'  
  
"Oh yeah, now I remember."  
  
Why did you find that again?  
  
"I was contemplating."  
  
Suicide.  
  
"Yes."  
  
You go back to that topic too much for your own good.  
  
"It's because I'm still not sure I made the right choice."  
  
So you aren't over it?  
  
"I'm over it to the extent where I won't do it."  
  
But you think about it.  
  
"Exactly."  
  
You're going in circles again.  
  
"It's what I'm used to."  
  
It's what you want to think you're used to.  
  
"Aren't I though?"  
  
You want to go home.  
  
"There is no such thing."  
  
Home is where the heart is.  
  
"And no heart means no home."  
  
You have a heart, you just need to thaw it.  
  
"You make me sound like Scrooge from A Christmas Carol."  
  
He at least got better.  
  
"He found a family."  
  
He found love.  
  
"I do love."  
  
But are not loved.  
  
"Is that my fault?"  
  
You don't allow yourself to be loved.  
  
"How do I do that?"  
  
Ask Tea.  
  
"I depend on her too much."  
  
I've already told you that.  
  
"But you keep telling me to ask her."  
  
Because she's the only one who knows.  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
Because she can read you.  
  
"How so?"  
  
It's your body language... She's afraid for you, and of you. You cannot love what you fear.  
  
"How can I fix that?"  
  
I don't know.  
  
"Then what help are you?"  
  
None whatsoever.  
  
"So then why am I talking to you?"  
  
Because you don't want to wake up.  
  
"And if I decided I did?"  
  
Then you would.  
  
"Then I decide that I do."  
  
You can't just decide, you have to really want it.  
  
"Everything always has to be the hard way doesn't it?"  
  
Only if you make it that way.  
  
"But I don't want to."  
  
But you need to.  
  
"I need to make my life more difficult?"  
  
You need to be happy.  
  
"You mean I need to be miserable."  
  
If that's the way you see it.  
  
"I want my mom and dad back."  
  
You sound like a five-year-old.  
  
"I could care less."  
  
So do you really want to be that immature?  
  
"I want the childhood I lost."  
  
You're starting to see it again.  
  
"But I'll never have it."  
  
As long as you believe that.  
  
"So I have to believe? Sounds like one of Motou's "Heart of the Cards" lines."  
  
You don't see the point in anything anymore.  
  
"Because there is no point."  
  
Does there have to be?  
  
"It would make sense if there was one."  
  
But there isn't, and that's what the real sense is.  
  
"Then the world needs to adjust."  
  
You need to adjust to the world.  
  
"Leave me alone."  
  
You don't like listening to advice.  
  
"Not when it's nonsense."  
  
So you're thoughts are nonsense?  
  
"No."  
  
Then why aren't you listening to them?  
  
"There's no point to it."  
  
Forget the points and just try living.  
  
"I am living."  
  
As a bodily function.  
  
"Is there any other way?"  
  
Ask Tea.  
  
"You're doing it again."  
  
It's because it's what you want to hear.  
  
"I've told you. I want the truth."  
  
Wake up.  
  
"Why?"  
  
Because you need to.  
  
"But I like this."  
  
Living out of reality?  
  
"I can breath out of reality."  
  
You can breath in reality as well.  
  
"Not as well as I can here."  
  
Tell her about it.  
  
"About what?"  
  
Why you bought the ring.  
  
"She doesn't need to know about my dream."  
  
But you need her to know about it.  
  
"You want me to tell her that I was dreaming of marrying her?"  
  
She wants to know.  
  
"How do you know?"  
  
I know that you know she wants to know.  
  
"You're talking in riddles."  
  
I'm talking how you'll understand me.  
  
"But I'm not."  
  
Then you don't understand yourself.  
  
"I know that already."  
  
So then try to fix it.  
  
"How?"  
  
Wake up.  
  
"You've already told me to."  
  
But you didn't listen.  
  
"What happened to our democracy?"  
  
The dictator lost his mind.  
  
"I want to find it."  
  
Then talk to Tea.  
  
"About what?"  
  
Everything.  
  
"Everything?"  
  
Yes.  
  
"What exactly is everything?"  
  
Everything. Start back to front and go front to back.  
  
"I'm not a book."  
  
You're a machine.  
  
"But I don't want to be."  
  
Then love a little.  
  
"I try."  
  
Not hard enough.  
  
"Is nothing ever good enough?"  
  
Not when you're only doing it because you're forcing yourself to.  
  
"Then how will I know that I really want to do something?"  
  
You'll smile.  
  
"That sounds too simple."  
  
It is.  
  
"So is it the answer?"  
  
Live with your questions, the answers will come.  
  
"When will they though?"  
  
When you're ready.  
  
"I'm ready now."  
  
You only think you are.  
  
"But then how do I know?"  
  
You'll never know. You'll just be.  
  
"I hate you sometimes."  
  
That's why you hate yourself.  
  
"Are you sure Mokuba doesn't need me?"  
  
He needs you, he loves you, but he needs other people in his life as well.  
  
"So I should try to push him away?"  
  
Just to the point where he makes some friends.  
  
"He's friends with Yugi."  
  
He's getting there.  
  
"So what should I do now?"  
  
Wake up.  
  
****************************  
  
Seto's eyes flickered open and he stared up at the ceiling above his bed.  
  
"How'd I get here?"  
  
Sitting up groggily he rubbed at his eyes and stared around the room. The last place he remembered being was in his office sitting on the couch, contemplating what had happened to Tea and whether or not he should just give up.  
  
He reached down into his pocket, since he was still fully dressed, shoes and all, and found that he pulled out the box he'd shoved into Tea's hands earlier.  
  
"What?" His eyes came up and he got out of the bed and opened up his door to listen to the silence of the house.  
  
"Anybody home?"  
  
He heard his voice echo back towards him in the hallways and then he closed his door behind him and ran down the stairs.  
  
"Anybody?"  
  
No one.  
  
"Hello?" His own voice still came back to him, this time as small and meek as it had come out and he walked over to his couch and sat down dejectedly with a sigh.  
  
"Alone..."  
  
You were expecting her to be here weren't you?  
  
"Yeah..." He stared down at the rug sadly.  
  
Then go find her.  
  
"But I drove her away."  
  
Then drive her back.  
  
A smile traced Seto's lips and he nodded silently. Standing up again he walked over to the door and left through it. Getting into his car he turned on the ignition and pulled out of his overly extensive driveway as he muttered to himself.  
  
"Nothing makes sense anymore... But I might as well join in with the madness rather than trying to stand up against it all by myself." 


	15. Pieces

"It's not that big of a deal, Yugi." Tea played her fork round and round in the spaghetti that was supposed to be her lunch.  
  
"But don't you want to know what he was thinking? I mean... Why? Do you think he's found someone else? It's possible... but Tea, oh, I'm so sorry."  
  
She sighed and put down her fork to look over at her distressed friend with a meek little smile. "Yugi... I do want to know what he's thinking, of course I do. But I don't think he's found anyone else." Her eyes wandered back down to the ring she'd removed from the box and slipped onto her finger, the wrong hand of course for where it was supposed to be, but it was there and he misty orbs flitted over the glittering gems. "He must have given this to me for a reason..."  
  
Yugi came over and sat down next to her. "I don't want to see you get hurt again, we all don't."  
  
"I know Yugi. I know..." Her voice trailed off into her other thoughts, back to their conversation. She had been so excited to go over there that afternoon, but it had ended in complete disaster. 'He seemed to be holding himself back... What did he say? That I've crushed my wings? That was sort of weird... I wonder what he's thinking. I wish I could just-' a warming thought of her stroking the side of his troubled head and telling him it'd all be fine and he could always tell her everything came to her head and she smiled with a longing sigh. 'He doesn't think I loved him, does he? I don't think so, or else he wouldn't have said that...'  
  
"Tea?"  
  
"Oh, what?" Her head came back up to cock at Yugi.  
  
"You just looked sort of spaced. Are you all right? I mean, if you need to talk about it..."  
  
"I know you're always there for me. But... I think right now I just have to go for a walk. I'll see you guys later, alright?"  
  
The spiky head bobbed up and down. "Alright, if you need to. Just, if you need help, we're here."  
  
She rolled her eyes and smiled. "I know, I know, you've already told me ten times. I'll see you later." And she walked out of the door of the game shop.  
  
Yugi's eyes cast down to the floor in a distracted fashion. "This has to be the most confusing relationship I've ever heard of."  
  
************************  
  
Seto drove up to park in front of her house and got out of the car to knock on the door and then crane around the side to see if she was in there. 'Is anyone home?'  
  
"Hello?"  
  
He knocked on the door and waited a little bit longer before he sighed, that would have been the easiest way... But of course this wasn't going to be easy for him.  
  
Getting back in the car he started heading for the game shop, guess number two. And as he pulled up in front he got out and opened up the door, Yugi was there, and the little head popped up, but before any words could come out of the mouth owned to the head Seto turned around again and went out the door.  
  
'Where could she be?'  
  
With a sigh he drove off to the park and got out of the car to start wandering through the endless pathways that he'd never spent the time to explore... This was all so strange. He knew he had to find her, but he didn't know what he'd do once he actually did find her. Tell her he still loved her? Tell her the endless nights he'd spent thinking about her and wishing life had been anything but what it had become? ...Or would he lie? He could tell her that it was all fine, they could work through this, talk a little. If they got back on the same page maybe they could get back together, and be happy.  
  
******************* "Seto! ...Big brother, it's me, Mokuba! ...Where are you?!"  
  
"Right here, Mokuba. I'm right here." He wrapped his arms around the small form and stroked the black head soothingly. "Just calm down, I'm right here..."  
  
Tears welled up in the small blue eyes and he grabbed onto his older brother's shirt and buried his face in it as he sobbed. "I thought I'd lost you. Where did you go? Why did you leave me, Seto? ...Did I do something wrong?"  
  
"No... you didn't do anything wrong, kiddo. It's me. I'm the one who did something wrong. But it's ok, I'm here for you now, I'm not leaving you again... ever." ******************** Kaiba grasped his fingers over the locket on his neck. Maybe it wasn't so bad. Maybe after all this time he'd just been fooling himself.  
  
"Tea?"  
  
Icy orbs had found the figure they'd been looking for, and slowly he walked up beside her, staring down at the ground. "Hey..."  
  
Her eyes blinked at him a second, surprised he was there. "Kaiba, what are you-?"  
  
"I'm sorry..." Stopping he grabbed her shoulder and turned her to face him, staring at her face. "I'm so sorry for all that I've done to you, Tea, and for all that I've put you through. Why do you put up with me? I've taken you in and stabbed you in the heart and yet you still come back the next day just to see me again... Why?"  
  
"I-... I don't know." Her lashes twitched up and down before she turned her head to the side and stared at the floor. "I didn't really think you were doing it on purpose... If I had known that you'd meant to-"  
  
"No... no. I never meant to, Tea. In all my life I never meant to hurt you." He bit his lip and dropped his hand to his side and took a few steps away, turning his back to her. "I'm just so screwed up. You have no idea what my life has been like... I'm not even sure if my being here does anyone any good, or if anyone would be better off without me... When you met me, you hated me. I didn't care, but now, if I could go back and change all that. I wouldn't be the same man that I was... But you can't change the past, which is something I've learned all too well. What there was cannot be changed no matter how hard you try, but, Tea-" Turning back around he stared at her, approached again and took her hand. "I don't want to ruin this. I don't think I have it in myself to ruin this... And you might say that it doesn't exist anymore, but-... but Tea. I love you. Please... take me back. Give me a second chance, a third chance, I don't even know what the number is anymore I-"  
  
Tea brought her finger and put it to his lips with a gentle smile. "Shhhh... hush, Seto, hush." She kissed him softly on the cheek. "Don't give up on yourself so easily. I know you're stronger than that and you know it just as well as I do... but Seto, I'm not sure you really need me, do you see?"  
  
Eyes filled with pain and he pulled away from her. "How can you say that? ...How can you possibly say that I don't need you? Do you know how I've been torturing myself?? Do you have any idea???" He grabbed her hands again and shut his eyes as he shook his head. "Please, just try, talk to me, anything... I need to be able to talk to you. I need to be able to touch you... Even if we're only friends it will be at least something. I'll keep to myself, I don't even have to say anything, please just don't ever think that I don't need you when that's anything but what I don't need..."  
  
Tea sighed and pulled her hands away to put them on either side of his head and lift his gaze up to meet hers, talking very sternly, but gently. "What do you want from me Kaiba? What is it that you need so badly that you'd throw away all that I knew you for?"  
  
"I-... Tea... it's- it's you." A smirk played over his lips, he knew how tragic this all must look. "It's you. You were the one who helped me, even if I was out to destroy myself you still clung on, that little piece of hope that I had long since abandoned... Don't you see? I have no parents, no older sibling, no aunt, no uncle, no grandfather to scream at when they do something that I can't stand... All I have is myself, and Mokuba. And Mokuba's growing up... you can see it too. He doesn't need me anymore; he can take care of himself... So who's left to take care of me? When I go to sleep at night who is going to be the one in the morning that I can say hello to and know that they'll accept me for who I am, faults or no... I need you there for me, Tea, for my friend... for, my, my fa-"  
  
She stopped him again by covering his mouth and nodded a silent understanding. "Alright, Seto. Alright. But if you go and give up on me again I'm not going to come back so easily again, okay? This is the last chance you're getting." And she removed her hand, stared. "Do you understand? I'm only one person."  
  
And he nodded, and took her hand and held it tightly. "I'm going to try my best, but promise me you won't tell anyone just yet. Is that fine? I-... I just don't think I can handle more than one person to worry over loosing you for... I have to remember what it's like not to be alone."  
  
Tea laughed and he smiled, and again he thought that maybe it wasn't so bad after all, and maybe all that'd he'd been through in his life was all just leading up to this... so that he could learn to be human again.  
  
"Alright, Seto... alright. I'll give you that, now you just go home and call me later tonight, you look like you're going to cry."  
  
Kaiba smiled and let go of her hands. "Yes Tea... I'll call you." He gave her one last smile before he turned and walked away from her... maybe it wasn't so bad...  
  
((WOW! Hasn't it been long enough people? *counts on fingers how long it's been since she last updated* ...Wooooow. That's a while. 3 months of so O.o REALLY sorry people, lol. Just hope you're happy with the fact that my fingers have broken free of their cobwebs. ^_^ and who said that being sick was bad for you? *counts again* ... just wow. Well, we hope you enjoyed this chapter. FINALLY got them back together... was it worth the wait? Hope so. Later people! Glassy isn't dead after all ^_^)) 


	16. Almost Normal

"Seto?" Mokuba knocked on the door softly, he'd heard soft mumbles coming from his brother's room for most of the night, and he didn't know what it was. It had been a while since Seto had taken any jobs late at night, and he couldn't think of anybody that his brother would be talking to... Tea had pretty much become a non-existent character in the young Kaiba's life, and he knocked on the door again. "Big brother? Are you in there?"  
  
Seto, he sighed. Whispering quietly into the phone. "I have to go now. Can I call you tomorrow?" He smiled at the response and nodded. "Sleep well." And he hung up. How many hours had that been now? To say the least it had to have been three or so. With a contented air hanging around his person he got up off of the bed and open the door. "What is it, Mokuba?"  
  
"Were you talking to someone?" The gray eyes stared up at his brother curiously, trusting.  
  
"Yeah..." The elder Kaiba patted the black hair. "Now go back to bed, kid. Sorry if I kept you up."  
  
Mokuba was about to object when he saw the expression on his brother's face. He wasn't looking for argument. And the younger one nodded, figuring that Seto would tell him eventually who he had been talking to for so long, and he went back into his room and shut the door, quietly whispering behind it. "Goodnight, big brother."  
  
***************************  
  
Tea laughed as she came downstairs that morning, brushing her hair as she hummed quietly to herself. It was a curious thing how just one conversation could put her in such high spirits, and she'd dressed herself to look utterly fabulous. A pastel rose tube top and a short black mini-skirt was all she needed to have her body appeal itself to the opposite sex at its finest, and today she was going to gloat. She'd put on a necklace of a small silver angel that rested just above where the tube top began, and her boots were taller than normal, black leather.  
  
"Lovely morning isn't it?" She spoke to her mirror image as she looked at one of the hanging glass frames on the wall. Turning away from it she skipped the last couple of steps in a leap and landed with a twirl, exuberance oozing from every pore on her body.  
  
"Hm... I wonder what I should do today?" Stopping a finger rested on her cheek thoughtfully and then the pondering expression lighted up. "I know! I'll go surprise Seto."  
  
All too happy with the idea she checked herself in the downstairs bathroom one last time to make sure that she looked absolutely stunning, and of course she did, and then she left from the house. It took all of her possible restraint to keep from skipping down the sidewalk; it was that wonderful to be alive.  
  
****************************  
  
Deciding to go to work today instead of staying home, Kaiba was sitting at his desk, having arrived earlier in the morning at the usual ungodly hour of the morning that he got up. His fingers were already buzzing over the keys when he heard the first buzz on his intercom for the day.  
  
"Mr. Kaiba, there's a woman here to see you. Should I let her in?"  
  
He sighed in annoyance and kept typing, only taking one hand off of the keyboard so he could push the button in order to respond. "Name please?"  
  
There was a pause and then a somewhat off reply. "She won't give me a name, sir."  
  
"Then what are you bothering me with this for?" It seemed absurd to be interrupted with some girl that wouldn't even have the manners to give a name before she was let into his office.  
  
Another pause awaited his response and then the answer was just as unsure as the first. "I'm afraid that she won't leave, sir."  
  
"Call security then." He didn't want to put up with this incompetence. "And if for some reason they don't come then come up with something yourself. It's not my job to-"  
  
"Hi Seto!"  
  
Kaiba froze and looked over at the black intercom on his phone. "Tea?"  
  
He heard a soft giggle. "Depends, can I come in now?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
In almost an instant the door was open and Tea came over to sit on the edge of his desk with a beaming smile. "So how are you?"  
  
His expression was confused, she looked overly happy, not to say it was a bad thing, it was just slightly unnerving. "Fine."  
  
"Just fine?" She leaned over further on the desk, practically begging for his eyes to look at the necklace that was dangling, but he stubbornly held his gaze away from the spot. Not entirely sure she hadn't had some sort of stimulant this morning, though that didn't seem like something that Tea would do... but still. She did seem to be so extremely enthusiastic that it led to suspicion.  
  
"Yes... just fine. How are you?" His fingers had stopped moving but he saved what he was working on, keeping in note that he had a meeting to go to at nine o'clock and he didn't want to miss that.  
  
"Wonderful actually. It's a pity to hear that you aren't doing any better than just fine. Anything that I can do to help?" Tea had hopped off of the desk and came over to be standing next to him, smiling sweetly with her arms folded behind her back.  
  
He folded the screen down of his laptop and turned his chair to face her. "I think I'm okay with being just fine, Tea, thank you though." Seto got up put the chair between himself and her without really thinking about it. "What made you decide to come down here?"  
  
Tea laughed sweetly. "I just wanted to stop by and see how you were doing. And since you obviously don't seem to be doing any better than 'fine' I thought I might kidnap you for the day."  
  
Kaiba sighed, and shook his head. That nervous tinge had allowed itself to dissolve and he met his eyes back at her. "I'm afraid I can't, Tea. I have meetings today and I have to go to them. If you wanted we could possibly do something later tonight. Would that be fine with you? I'll take you to dinner."  
  
"But Seto..." Her voice trailed off and she pouted, she'd gone to the bother to make herself look fabulous, she wanted him to spend more than an hour or two with her today.  
  
"I'm sorry, Tea, but I can't just drop my work to go wander around with you for the day. Believe me, if it was possible I would. But I have a company to run."  
  
"You're not going to get all business oriented on me again are you?" She still hadn't let up her pleading expression and she leaned one knee down on his chair so that he could stop fretting with it in his hands.  
  
He shook his head. "Of course not, Tea. If I was going to do that then you wouldn't see me until at least a week from now. I have plenty of work that I could make for myself but I won't."  
  
"But you can't just take off this one day to be around with me?"  
  
"No, Tea. I can't." She didn't seem to be getting the idea into her head, but he had to make it clear to her. He was glad that she was here and that she wanted to spend time with him, but she had to understand that he couldn't just abandon KaibaCorp because she wanted to come rescue him from the world of hard drives and motherboards for a day. "But I promise that I'll come pick you up at your house as soon as I can, alright?" He hugged her over the back over the chair, inhaling the sweet scent of her as she hugged him back and then he pushed her back lightly. "Okay then?"  
  
Tea finally conceded and nodded in response. Hopping out of his chair she kissed his cheek and winked. "Just make sure that you don't leave me there all night."  
  
"I won't." With that reassuring knowledge in mind he watched Tea leave the office with a wave to him and as soon as she disappeared behind the wooden frame and shut it he sat down with a sigh and put a hand on his head as he pulled up the screen of his computer again. Clicking open the windows he smiled gently. 'Well that was interesting... I just hope that she doesn't try to come take me away from here everyday. If she does then I won't manage to get anything done...'  
  
"Mr. Kaiba, it's time for your meeting, sir."  
  
His eyes looked over at the clock and he got up, straightening his clothing just for the pure sake of trying to get himself back into a working mode entirely. "Thank you. I'll be there shortly."  
  
((YAY! It's not dead yet ^^ Okay. I'm sorry people again for not updating in so long. And sorry also if I made the characters warp a little, it's hard when I haven't written in so long, and I was being lazy and didn't want to go back and read 12 chapters to get back in the mode so I just read the last one... I figured you people would be happier with a new chapter that was slightly funked than none at all but my head straight, hehe. Anyway. Summer's coming soon!)) 


	17. Midnight

((People aren't checking on my story anymore since it hasn't been updated in so long . Gerf. Oh well. Not that I blame you people for hating me since I'm an irresponsible author... but I actually wrote another chapter and it hasn't taken me a couple of months...))  
  
Tea sighed as she dropped her coat lazily on the floor as she walked in the doorway. Seto had needed a little more breaking down at dinner, and he still had too much of a distance for her liking. 'But he's getting there.' The smile that came to her face then was almost sadistic, but she shook her head quickly. 'I'm starting to think like Mai...'  
  
The phone started to ring and she went over to it, wondering who would be calling this late. "Hello?"  
  
"Tea! Hi. What happened to you? I've been calling you all day and you never showed up."  
  
She gasped and put a hand to her mouth. "I'm so sorry, Yugi. I totally forgot."  
  
The reply on the other end seemed disappointed, not that she could blame him. He had been forgotten about and probably waited at the movies for hours, knowing what Yugi was like.  
  
"It's okay, Tea... I understand. I mean... yeah. You must have just spaced... Don't worry about it..."  
  
"Yugi, I'm really sorry." She couldn't believe she'd forgotten about her friend just for a day of shopping and then dinner with Seto.  
  
"It's fine, Tea. It's fine... I-" He paused, she heard the tone of excuse in his voice. "I have to go now. I'll see you tomorrow, alright?"  
  
Tea nodded. "Okay, Yugi. See ya." She hung up. Knowing his last statement had been more of a formality than a wish, she sighed. 'I really didn't meant to forget about you, Yugi.'  
  
Trying to life the weight from herself she went upstairs and looked at some of the new clothes she'd bought. 'Maybe I should stop by at Yugi's and try to cheer him up.' She smiled. 'Yeah, that's what I'll do. I'll go cheer him up tomorrow.'  
  
She ran back downstairs and grabbed the phone book, running her finger down the V's, muttering to herself quietly. "Valentine, Valentine, Valentine... AH! Valentine!" She smiled and pushed in the number, listening to the ring on the opposite end before a voice became present.  
  
"Hello, Mai speaking."  
  
She leaned back on the wall. "Hey, Mai."  
  
***********************************  
  
Kaiba came back into the mansion and ran upstairs. He hadn't meant to let things go so late... Knocking on Mokuba's door softly he opened it. "Mokuba?" He saw his little brother sitting at the computer with about five different instant messaging windows open. Seeing that his younger sibling was oblivious to his presence the elder Kaiba came up behind his brother. "What are you doing up so late, kiddo?"  
  
Hearing his older brother Mokuba tensed just slightly and pushed a button on his keyboard and all the windows immediately shrank, and he spun his chair around and he smiled. "Hi, Seto."  
  
Kaiba raised an eyebrow at the sudden hiding of the screens, but just mentally logged it away, so as not to arouse suspicion, before he let the slight inquiry slip off his features. "Shouldn't you be in bed?"  
  
Mokuba looked over at the clock. "Oh, well... maybe." He turned off the monitor and got up to go to his dresser.  
  
"You did get some dinner, didn't you?" Seto let his eyes follow his younger sibling.  
  
A nod answered him. "Yeah, I ordered in some pizza." He stopped opening his drawer and looked back at Seto with a slight hint of worry and guilt in his eyes that he quickly hid behind a smile. "Goodnight."  
  
"Don't you-"  
  
Mokuba cut him off before he could finish. "No, I think I'm alright getting myself in bed." He smirked softly. "I am almost thirteen, big brother."  
  
"I know, Mokuba. I know... Sleep well then." The elder left the room then and when the door was shut behind him a shadow of worry came into the back of his mind. 'What is he hiding from me?'  
  
Seto shook his head, remembering it was almost midnight... Maybe he was just worrying over nothing. If Mokuba was trying to hide something then he had a right to, it was his room, and his big brother had no reason to be invading. But it still worried him. What would there be to hide?  
  
This question hung over him as he walked away from Mokuba's room and headed for his own. It was probably just because he was tired, his mind was making up things to fret over that they didn't need to worry about.  
  
But it still bothered him slightly, and he opened the door and shut it behind him, walking over to his bed he collapsed down on it. He'd left work a little early today so he'd have to make up for that tomorrow... So he might get home late again if Tea wanted to see him again, which considering her mood, she would. If Mokuba was up when he came back then he might question him a bout it a little more. It was troublesome that his brother was still awake when he thought that they'd had the agreement that his little brother was in bed by ten o'clock.  
  
With a hard sigh he shut his eyes. It didn't do any good to worry about it now, if it bothered him too much then he'd ask Mokuba about it then. Now what he had to do was sleep, and not think about any of this or he wouldn't be able to and he'd be no use to anyone tomorrow.  
  
*****************************  
  
Mokuba waited in his room until he heard the sound of Seto's feet not moving, signifying that his big brother had gone to bed. That was when he went back over to his computer and turned the monitor back on. Opening up the now blinking windows he sat down and typed:  
  
Sorry, parent came in. What were you saying?  
  
((And there we go. PLEASE people, I'm being of the sad little begging sort and wishing you people to forgive me for being evil person and not updating T_T I didn't mean to. I didn't mean to be a bad person... Anyway. So sorry. Hope this makes up for it a little at least...)) 


	18. Why

((And now you people get to know what Mokuba is doing finally.))  
  
In Seto's dream he was talking to Tea, just like they had been at dinner they were both sitting there making up conversation about what had gone on in the past while, anything that had changed... But then the oddest thing happened, when she opened her mouth, all he heard from her was wringing. He blinked.  
  
"Are you alright?"  
  
She coughed, but it just came out in short beeping noises. And before he could ask again if she was fine he jerked awake, still heard the ringing. Looking around the room to reorient himself, he then realized what it was, and he reached into his pocket, having fallen asleep in his clothes and he pulled out his cell phone, rubbing at his eyes.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Is this Seto Kaiba, brother and legal guardian of Mokuba Kaiba?" The unfamiliar male voice came from the other end.  
  
Seto nodded. "Speaking, may I ask who's calling please?"  
  
"This is officer Dunbar, I'm calling about your brother."  
  
The elder Kaiba's brain started going into a frenzy and got up off of his bed. "Yes...? What is it? Is he alright?"  
  
"Mokuba is fine, Mr. Kaiba, but I'm afraid we found him next to the drug store with a couple of his friends. We'd appreciate it if you could come down to the station. Your brother refused to call you himself."  
  
Auburn hair was brushed quickly and he changed into some clothing that was less crumpled as he talked. "Yes, I'll be right there." He waited for the officer to hang up the phone and then he hung it up himself and slipped on his shoes. Questions were running through his brain as quickly as he could think them up. What had Mokuba been doing out of the house so late? Did it have anything to do with him hiding those windows on his computer screen? Why was he down at the police station now? If nothing had happened to him then why would his guardian be needed?  
  
Kaiba shook his head, he'd find that out once he got down there, for now he could rest assured with the fact that Mokuba was healthy, but just down at the police station and they'd get things sorted out once he was down there.  
  
******************************  
  
It had taken approximately fifteen minutes for him to get down there, and he'd come up to one of the officers and asked where he was supposed to go, and they told him.  
  
Seto walked into officer Dunbar's office and sat down as the man beckoned him to.  
  
"I'm sorry for having to call you down here so late. But I figured that you'd rather sort it out now than have your brother be help in one of our cells for tonight. Mokuba is the only one that we know of with a guardian however, the rest of the boys seem to be without legal caretakers." The officer leaned over his desk slightly and rubbed at his mustache. "You're probably wondering what charges are being put against your brother though. Would you like me to tell you?"  
  
Seto nodded. "If you would please."  
  
"We found him and his friends smoking some pot, also known as marijuana. Which by law is illegal to be in the possession of, if you weren't already aware of this."  
  
Blue eyes just stared at him in disbelief. Mokuba? With drugs? ...He'd never done anything that would cause Mokuba to turn to drugs for relief. Well, it was a possibility that he had, but not recently. And he'd always told Mokuba that he could come talk to him if he had a problem, but why would he turn to drugs? And illegal ones at that...  
  
Considering that most drugs that people got high off of were illegal he wrote off this last thought process as exempt from the data. He shook his head. The police officer must be right though, after all, it was his job, and marijuana had a definite smell to it. The sickly sweet sent that was none too pleasant to the senses.  
  
But why? He couldn't accept the fact to that Mokuba, of all people, had done something illegal. Something illegal like that, and then gotten caught at it. It was probably good that he got caught at it... this was different than anything Seto had ever done. Though his he learned to regret but they were hidden away along with the rest of his past.  
  
"Could I please see him?"  
  
Seto got up and followed the officer to the small temporary cell that they were holding Mokuba and obviously who were the other boys that had been down there. The CEO wasn't surprised to find that most of them were older, around his own age in fact, but not from Domino High. He'd never seen them before, and by the look of most of them they had dropped out of high school to try the mediocre living on the streets.  
  
"Big brother! Wh-what are you doing here?"  
  
The eyes suddenly became colder, even though the expression on his little brother's face was that of distress, he now knew why. That hint of worry that he'd seen a few hours past had the same fear and guilt inside of it. "I could ask you the same question."  
  
Mokuba blinked at his brother, he'd seen that expression before, but never had it been directed at him exactly. The indifferent, flat gaze made him feel all the more smaller, all the more horrible for having hidden something like this from his brother... and it had been going on for some time too. A couple of months perhaps, but Seto hadn't known, he'd been too concerned with other things like the company and such to think that his little brother might have been doing something wrong.  
  
"I-... I-..."  
  
"Be quiet, kid..." The normal affection in the tone had disappeared, and the sad pain was crushed inside of Seto's spirit, he left it there to hobble around... He wouldn't care for it.  
  
Looking over at the guard Seto went over and whispered to him quietly, asking what the options were for Mokuba. The officer said that they would be willing to let him off on bail, but it would be kept on the records that he'd been there before and he wouldn't get off so easily next time. The elder Kaiba nodded, and then whispered something quietly to him.  
  
Seto then looked back over at Mokuba, the same monotone expression on his face. "You're staying here for the night. I might come to get you in the morning, depending on whether I think you've learned something from all this. Don't count on it though."  
  
CEO turned away from brother. He walked out of the station without looking at anyone, talking to anyone... Just when life started to get good again it had to shoot him in the back where it hurt the most, where he hadn't seen it coming from. Mokuba had done drugs. He could accept this fact. He was fine with the actual action of lighting up the joint and smoking it. He was fine with the fact that Mokuba had been with older people, people he had no idea who they were and that probably were not decent to be around. He only had a problem with one thing. Why had this been hidden from him?  
  
He loved Mokuba with all his heart, and he trusted him to be a responsible young gentleman and to take care of himself. This had been an ungentlemanly thing, with awful people, not to mention older, and illegal to top it off. And if it wasn't bad enough he hadn't even told anyone about it, but gone out of his way to hide it, and done a crummy job at that as well. Mokuba would just have to learn. Maybe staying in a jail cell for a night would help him to realize that if he did this again then that would be all that he was left with.  
  
"I'm sorry..." Seto couldn't help but blame himself partially for this. He must have done something wrong when he attempted to take on the role of both parent and brother. Maybe he shouldn't have left Mokuba alone so much, or maybe he should have kept a more structured environment. But wouldn't that have made his little brother miserable? Yes. He knew it would have. The result would not have been this however.  
  
Kaiba sighed as he got back in his car and drove off, not planning on going home. He was going to go to work, but he made a promise to himself. He wouldn't stop talking to Tea; he wouldn't stop talking to Mokuba. If anything he was would keep an extra eye on his little brother and a little less of a watch on Tea.  
  
When life gives you lemon, stab it with a knife and squeeze out the juice into your eyes until you're blind and can't see the hell that it is anymore...  
  
((TA-DAH! There we go you spiffy people. And yes, I know it's a little screwy for Mokuba to have gone and done this... I think I'm corrupting my own story some. *sobs* Neee... bad Glassy. Ok, anyway. Hope you liked it despite that badness of it.)) 


	19. Mended

Seto had invited Tea over the next day, planning to have a talk about how he was going to have to spend more time with Mokuba. To say the least, Tea wasn't happy.  
  
It wasn't that she didn't understand, it was just that she couldn't see why he couldn't spend time with both her AND Mokuba... She would never get it.  
  
The other option Kaiba gave her wasn't something that she'd expected either, he asked her to marry him. He had said that that way he could try to come up with a family environment for his little brother, and he could probably spend more time with her.  
  
But Tea refused.  
  
She wasn't prepared for that kind of commitment, what with how their relationship had gone from extreme to extreme since it even began. In fact she had gotten so freaked out by the proposition that she left the house.  
  
Later that night Seto had called her on the phone, and they'd had a talk. Kaiba had put a lot of thought into the topic, how it would work with the company, how it would involve Mokuba... everything. Tea just seemed to think this was "dating," and not anything serious. That had bothered Seto when he heard it, but he could get past that. The thing that he couldn't get past was how little thought Tea had put into anything of the sort... and for the first time she just seemed to him, really... well, immature.  
  
To him, Tea seemed to have no thought for the future, just living in a day- to-day basis, dating for the sake of dating. The fact that they seemed to be compatible didn't mean anything to her; it was just nice. She didn't think he was "the one" or anything like that; he was just Seto Kaiba, her boyfriend.  
  
The fact that she had flat out refused him, not even considering it, like it was some alien concept that would have her murdered... it hurt. And he asked her if it was him, she said no, that it wasn't. She'd told him that right now she wouldn't get married to anyone.  
  
Cooperate Executive Officer of the Kaiba Corporation looked at Tea Gardner, high school student and fickle teenage girl. And as his icy gaze had stared across the room at the wall vacantly while he was on the phone, he wondered why he hadn't seen it. Was the only reason he'd become so attached to her was because she was the only person there? And he was merely looking for human interaction that could not be obtained within the family?  
  
He was. It hit him flat in the face that he was. After all, what did he and Tea have in common? He ran a multi-billion dollar corporation; she focused on getting her grades above a C. He could beat anyone when it came to computers; she didn't even know what OS stood for. He took care of his little brother as a role model; she was an only child with overprotective parents...  
  
In laymen's terms, there was absolutely NOTHING that he could place that they had in common except that they were both lonely and looking for someone to fill that hole. He was looking for commitment because he'd never had that kind of solid base to come from. But if he and Tea did in fact get married, how would she help? She'd probably expect him to act more, quote unquote, "normal." Also known as running around with other teenage guys and going to parties... That simply wasn't him. And would she set a good example for Mokuba? Most likely not. With her reaction on how he needed to spend more time with his little brother, would she even let Mokuba get an equal share of time when they were married?  
  
Originally he thought that they could, but looking at it from a third person perspective changed it.  
  
In the end, Seto made the decision that they should break up... for good. He knew how, he'd been happily single before any of this had started. He'd taken a taste of the normal life; it just wasn't for him. He needed his computers, his company... everything that Kaiba Corp stood for, and everything that Gozaburo had trained him to be. That was what he had been honed into, a business executive, and to put it very frankly, that's what he was good at. It didn't meant that he couldn't spend time with his little brother, or that he couldn't reminisce about menial things on some occasions... All he needed to do was accept who he was. And this was it; this was who he was. Seto Kaiba of Kaiba Corp.  
  
As for the loss of Tea in the household? Mokuba was okay with it, because for the first couple of months, Seto spent a lot of time with him. As it had turned out, Mokuba had never actually done the drugs. He was just with the people, and that was the first night he'd ever seen them doing drugs, he didn't even know that they did that.  
  
The event was soon decided to never be talked about again, and Seto slowly sealed himself back over. It was healthy for him though, after so much confusion, a little bit of normality was refreshing.  
  
And so he returned to his work, staying up late at night and refining programs while he lived off coffee. The household fell back into place, almost as if nothing had ever happened to change it. Though now both brothers had grown to understand each other a little better, even as they grew apart when around each other. Mokuba getting older just meant that he didn't need as much of the parent as he just wanted the brother to be a brother.  
  
One night while Kaiba was sitting in front of his laptop, he heard a soft knocking on the door and looked up.  
  
It was raining outside, the storm had been going for quite some time, but it hadn't gotten too serious. Seto wasn't highly surprised, though, when he saw the black bush of hair come through the door.  
  
"Big brother?"  
  
Looking back at the screen he began typing with the smallest hint of a smile crossing over his lips. "Yes, Mokuba?"  
  
"Could I sit in with you for a little bit? ... I can't sleep." He came over next to Seto and looked at him with his grayish blue eyes, still tinged with admiration and innocence, ever after all this time.  
  
The smile grew to a smirk and the CEO nodded. "Sure thing, kiddo."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
Mokuba went and lay down on the couch. Looking over at Seto he smiled to himself softly and shutting his eyes after the next flash of lightning came, he whispered quietly to himself so that only he could hear, something that he'd thought of a long time ago when he and his older brother had just left the orphanage... that was when it had started anyway, but he'd never finished it.  
  
"Good things come to those who wait. Seen unknown and known too late. Through and through and thick and thin, Closer than brothers, better than friends. Kiss me goodnight and go off to bed I know you don't sleep, but just rest your head Not that it's past and I've seen it so long Don't forget I'm still here, you don't have to be strong. The world may have ended, but that doesn't mean me. Since when did the end apply to eternity? So keep your eyes open, and don't drift away, Waiting needs patience; forever and a day."  
  
~Fin~  
  
Welp, that's it people. Sorry if this last chapter ended up kind of short, but you wouldn't believe how hard it was... I'd like to thank all of my lovely fans for sticking with me so long, through all those long dry spells without updates, lol. Anyway... Hope you have a great rest of the day, week, month, year... anything. I might post now and again for other things, hehe. ^_^ Luv ya guys. !Adios! Ja'ne! Bon voyage! Abiz! 


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